"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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What do I do?

wtopher

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Hey DJs everywhere,

I've been seeing this girl for 2 months now. We're both 15 years old.

She's nice, she's amazing, and I'm happy with her.

Recently, we've been talking about our relationship, if we were official, and she tells me that I'm too special to risk at the moment, and that it's too soon from her last breakup. She was kinda overlapping her ex and me when we were first seeing each other.

But I understand, and I've been giving her time and space.

I know for a fact that 3 other guys like her, and I get jealous easily. How do I know if she's committed to me, if she wants to be with me? If she's not seeing other guys? I really like this girl and I don't want to miss her.

We've already started 2nd base (touching) physically, so I wonder about her commitment emotionally.

Thanks.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Rhoto

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Oh boy...

Best way to gauge her feelings - make her jealous. Start spending your time with other girls.

But if this chick does like you, she will want to be committed...now.

Think about it - WTF does "too special to risk at the moment" really mean?

She doesn't want to stay attached so she can be free to do whatever she wants with whomever she wants. Think about it dude - she was hanging out with you and her ex at the same time. What does that say about her values and yours?

My opinion - Cut off the contact. No text replies, no phone calls that last for more than 2 minutes, no IMs, facebook any of that sh1t.

Whatever she asks you - "Are you mad at me" "Did I do something wrong" or whatever your only response should be - "No." And DROP the conversation. Do not show emotions, don't say things like "I really like you and want to be with you." They backfire, tried and tested.

You're 15 man. Have fun with girls, don't be some needy chump that will torture himself for one measly pair of tits and a vagina. And I appreciate that you like her, having a girl around that you can kiss and touch is fun, but remember, there are tons of them out there and you don't know what makes you happy until you know a lot of them.

Focus on school and getting into a good college.
Focus on joining clubs and learning how to dynamically interact with a lot of people.
Focus on becoming a better man.
 

wtopher

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Thanks Rhoto.

She keeps saying that it's too soon from her last breakup. That's all she keeps saying if the subject pops up.

I'll take your advice and stop sending messages for a bit.

She doesn't go to my school, but my friend that knows her and goes to her school says she's hanging around with this guy. A lot, nothing sexually and such, just he hangs around with her a lot.

Thanks for your help,
wtopher.
 

wtopher

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Oh, and I hang out with a bunch of female friends. I don't want to make this situation into a game though.
 

Rhoto

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wtopher said:
Thanks Rhoto.

She keeps saying that it's too soon from her last breakup. That's all she keeps saying if the subject pops up.

I'll take your advice and stop sending messages for a bit.

She doesn't go to my school, but my friend that knows her and goes to her school says she's hanging around with this guy. A lot, nothing sexually and such, just he hangs around with her a lot.

Thanks for your help,
wtopher.
Again, stop caring man. And if you mean "for a bit" it should be a month at least. If not the rest of the school year.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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dj_jazzybrad

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Hey man, I was just in the EXACT same situation. I got jealous easily, and the girl that i was seeing who didnt want to be "official" was chilling with other guys, trying to make me jealous on purpose. I hung with other girls, and she started being a total b!tch to my friends who were girls that i was hanging out with, so I nexted her. She's been trying to contact me, but i've moved on and it was a good decision. Probably not the outcome you're looking for, but it helps and it showed me that she definitely wasn't right for me.

I've definitely learned a lot from her.
 

wtopher

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I ended it with her. Thank you very much. You all have helped me out a lot.

wtopher.
 
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