"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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What do I do?

andreus

Don Juan
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OK, I've been going out with my girlfriend for a few weeks. She's great; nice, funny, and really hot. I really like her, but I only like her; I'm not obsessed or anything.

However, she's sort of been getting upset lately because its always her that is asking me out. She is always the one who calls and makes plans. I know that is something I can work on, but what exactly should I do? Is this a bad thing?

Thanks for any help!
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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SenorSuave

Don Juan
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Well, if you aren't too attached then it shouldn't be much of a problem. But here's a nice idea. Setup a "date" with her somewhere out of the ordinary. For example, go to a book store (Borders, Barnes and Noble) and browse through. Go through the self-improvement section and point out books of areas she needs help with (it's more of a c and f thing here) or, if you have created enough attraction, go through the Karma Sutra books and tease her about different positions she should try with you.
 

andreus

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Well, I always act a little c + f with her (I've never had trouble not being AFC and stuff). However, I feel a little uncomfortable that she doesn't think I like her as much as she likes me. I just planned a couple of dates for us to make her happier.
 

mxylplk

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don't worry too much why you feel that "you only like her." Have fun with this courtship. As for her being upset that she always makes the plans, simply surprise her with one of your own. It doesn't have to be costly. Go for a bike ride together, go to the beach, get some lunch from a take out or from your own place and have a picnic somewhere then later sing something to her (if you're musical), or go for ice cream.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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