"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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What do I do?

andreus

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OK, I've been going out with my girlfriend for a few weeks. She's great; nice, funny, and really hot. I really like her, but I only like her; I'm not obsessed or anything.

However, she's sort of been getting upset lately because its always her that is asking me out. She is always the one who calls and makes plans. I know that is something I can work on, but what exactly should I do? Is this a bad thing?

Thanks for any help!
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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SenorSuave

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Well, if you aren't too attached then it shouldn't be much of a problem. But here's a nice idea. Setup a "date" with her somewhere out of the ordinary. For example, go to a book store (Borders, Barnes and Noble) and browse through. Go through the self-improvement section and point out books of areas she needs help with (it's more of a c and f thing here) or, if you have created enough attraction, go through the Karma Sutra books and tease her about different positions she should try with you.
 

andreus

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Well, I always act a little c + f with her (I've never had trouble not being AFC and stuff). However, I feel a little uncomfortable that she doesn't think I like her as much as she likes me. I just planned a couple of dates for us to make her happier.
 

mxylplk

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don't worry too much why you feel that "you only like her." Have fun with this courtship. As for her being upset that she always makes the plans, simply surprise her with one of your own. It doesn't have to be costly. Go for a bike ride together, go to the beach, get some lunch from a take out or from your own place and have a picnic somewhere then later sing something to her (if you're musical), or go for ice cream.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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