Wanted: Your Most AFC Move

[Paul Owen]

Wow.

I have been there dude. With this one chick I:

Talked to her on MSN for hours, about her past, her days spent shopping, her friends (the most boring individuals from what I could tell) and a million and one other things that would normally cause me to slit my wrists to escape the sheer tedium

Agreed with everything she said. I even professed my love of children to get into her good books (in reality my hatred of kids is I think pretty much unrivalled).

Bought her loads of presents (I think one of the last things she said to me when it all ended was 'Lets just be friends. Thank you so much for all the wonderful presents'. C*nt).

Complimented her all the time. Always told her she was the most beautiful, intelligent person in the world. (In reality I can see now that she is an average looking, spoilt, boring, conceited **** with not an original thing to say).

On top of it I asked one of my female friends for advice. She basically told me that the best way to get into this girls knickers (heart I was thinking at the time) was to 'kiss her arse'. In other words just suck up to her like the little puppy I was being.

I told her I loved her after going out with her once IRL. (By the way I met this girl in real life, not on MSN- but I talked to her exclusively on MSN for about two months).

So I acted like a ****ing *****. Its not even about being a man you know. Its just about having some ****ing dignity. I will NEVER, EVER go through that again. For what its worth I'm a pretty bad man now if I do say so myself so its all good.

 

[Oxide]

live and learn, eh guys?

 

[Rahul]

This one takes the cake...

You guys had some pretty good ones, especially the guy with the journal, but I think I might be a contender for first place...

Ok, so I asked this girl out at the end of senior year (last year) and I had this crush on her for 3 years (ever since she transferred to our school sophomore year). I always wanted to ask her out but I was always too shy, too afraid that I would get rejected. She was an 8 and if she lost 5 pounds she would have been a 9. What I did to protect myself was that I avoided any ******d signs that I was interested in her at all. I was really funny in highschool and I was very much an individual, even though I chose some of the wrong friends at the start (loosers) I became really popular over the last two years. I was always really sure of myself in all other areas besides chicks and I guess I made it seem like I was "in demand". Well lo and behold, when I asked her out she revealed that she had strong feelings for me over the past two years but she always thought that I hated her. Well when I was finally in the game I did everything completely wrong and my complete inexperiance with women totally fvcked me over...

Here are a few examples of some of the mistakes I made:

Her: So how many girlfriends have you had in the past?
Me: You're my first, I've never really had the confidence to approach a girl...
Her: Wow, I thought that you would have had tons of girlfriends...

Me: (on her phone answering machine) Hey...It's me...Sorry...I dont know what to say...Sometimes I think that the reason I can't talk to you is because...You're on a different level than me...sometimes I don't think I'm good enough for you...

In addition to this I would call her everyday and talk for hours, she would always be the one to end the phone conversation, and we never got into anything sexual.

As you can probably guess she was incredibly attracted to me at the beginning and then towards the end everything just started coming apart. I didn't know why because I thought that by worshipping her and treating her as a goddess I would "win her love" and she would be mine forever. I completely ironed out all of her faults in my mental image of her because convinced myself that she was perfect, even though she was far from it. I had myself convinced that I would never find another girl like her and that I should hold on for dear life. Finally the dreaded LJBF bomb was dropped on my fragile, weak, ***** heart. As a last ditch effort I called her begging to be let back into her life, and when that didn't work this is the letter I wrote her:

Andrea (name changed of course),

It’s been a few days and I’ve had some time to think. I’m sorry but we can’t be friends, I hope you understand. I need to move on with my life and being friends with you would make it much more difficult for me. Even though you said it in the nicest way what you said still hurt, and you need to understand that when you break someone’s heart you can’t just go on living life as normal and pretending that everything is ok. I know you never meant to hurt me but it hurts whether you meant it or not. If we were to be friends I’d never get over you. To you I’d be your friend but to me you would always be the girl I never got to hold or kiss or let in on all my inner stirrings. Your voice, your smile, your laugh, they would always remind me of my failure. I need closure and for me closure means that I can’t see you or talk to you. I need time to sort myself out and find where I stand.

Maybe you think I’m over reacting, after all we never went out. But I had so much more invested in this then you did and I don’t think you can imagine how bad it feels. When I asked you out and you said yes that very first time, three years of bottled up emotion came out. I’ve wanted you since the first day I saw you and just when I’ve finished unpacking all of my emotional baggage I’ve come to realize that it all has to be put away again.

I was a fool to ever reveal my emotions but feelings are a weakness that we all possess I guess. Every time you caught me staring, every time our eyes met just know that I was thinking of what I would say if I ever got enough courage to talk to you. I’m a fragile person Samrah and this wound will leave a mark to be sure. I feel like a child again, lost and completely powerless to keep my hopes from being destroyed. Only now it’s worse because not only do I have shattered hopes to deal with, but also shattered dreams and aspirations.

I hope you understand, and for what little time I’ve known you I think you will. I can’t be your friend because I didn’t get into this for friendship. Please don’t call me; I just can’t deal with this right now. Maybe someday when do eventually get over you, when the years have finally healed me, maybe then. Until then just know that I would have loved you. I came just short of loving you but I didn’t, because love has to go both ways, it cannot be just given or just taken. I’m sorry for this and other things, I just didn’t want to leave anything unsaid.

Goodbye.

Isn't that the most pvssy bull**** you've ever read? Whenever I read this I just sit in disbelief at how much of a pvssy I was, well never again...

 

[lynx]

Four years ago, in my AFC days, I had a one-week love affair with a woman who was spending her vacation in my hometown. The whole time we were together, she was caring and sweet. We had amazing sex the whole time. I didn't act clingy or needy while we were together that week. Before she left, she said she wanted to stay in touch with me and that she would be back in a few months for another vacation and that I could come visit her whenever I wanted. As soon as she left, I sent her a very romantic e-mail. She replied to my first two e-mails, but her tone wasn't as romantic as mine. When she didn't reply to my third e-mail after two weeks, I sent her another e-mail asking her if I had acted too sentimental. She said no, not to worry, and that she would send me a letter. After six weeks of not hearing from her, I wrote to her in a casual tone. She didn't reply so I sent her another e-mail asking her to write. Then I sent her another e-mail apologizing for asking her to write to me!!! After about four months of not hearing from her, she sent me an e-mail in which she said something along the lines of, "I had a great time with you, but let's leave it at that. Nice memories. End of story, blah, blah, blah. Good luck. You deserve good things."

I was really hurt, and I realized that it was better not to write to her anymore. I wanted to, but I didn't. Luckily for me, I was seeing another girl the whole time I was acting all AFC towards this girl who rejected me through her cruel e-mail. With this other girl, I actually acted less clingy and less sentimental, and I never lost my cool. After a few months, she did break up with me when she realized that I didn't want anything too serious. By then, I had had enough sex with her, anyway, and I wasn't attached to her.

The lesson I learned was: When a chick really likes you, she'll stick around for a long time unless you start acting clingy and insecure.

 

[naoi deag se deag]

One of my coworkers at the pool I lifeguarded at is the hottest girl I had ever seen (I know, don't dip the pen in the company ink). We flirted like crazy when I first starting working there, but then gradually she stopped being interested in me, probably because I never made any kind of move on her. So one day, I go in to start my shift, and she's just getting off. So I tell her, "Please stay, we never get to talk anymore" and she makes some excuse about having to go to a birthday party, so I tell her, "I'll pay you your wage to stay for a few hours." So we chat and have kind of a forced conversation, and she finally leaves, saying, "I want my money next weekend." So I smile at her, thinking she's joking.

I see her the next weekend, and she asks where her money is.

So I go to the bank and withdraw it for her.

 

[Oxide]

^^^ that was beautiful. it made me cry.

wait, no it didnt

 

[assasin]

Oh man, well I've done plenty, from practically stalking a oneitis through to sending this one girl I'd made out with whilie drinking 2 letters a day for a week.

But here's the biggy. I was still a virgin, just moved into my first place, and below me lived this HOT blonde from south africa. She had the looks, the body and the accent to die for.

Any-how I'd chatted to her, C+F and everything, just because I happened to be on a high after just getting promoted at work. I was feeling good, and forgot to be intimidated by this girl. So a little later she invites me down to her room where she's having a few drinks with her friends. I got quite drunk, smoked some weed and we decided to go to an indian restaurant.

That's were I got too drunk, and had to go throw up in the bathroom. Now this hot girl FOLLOWS ME IN THERE and starts trying to kiss me! I wouldn't let her because I'd just been throwing up didn't think it would be pleasant.

Saw her the next day and tried for a kiss, which she refused. So, ok - lesson learned, drink to moderation or it screws your game. Not too AFC so far.

Here's the kicker though. A month later she comes back from a night out, and has about 10 friends with her. Music going, I decide to go down and join in. She seems pleased to see me and I'm fitting in really well with these friends of hers. She introduces me to one guy who she announces she's planning on bedding that night, but he's VERY drunk and starts throwing up, before passing out.

So now she's turning her attention to me, and as we're dancing close, she whispers in my ear "I want to **** you".

And I replied:



"err... what?"



(hangs head in shame)

Never got another chance.

 

[Oscar Wilde]

Well, I was a pretty bad AFC - cost me a few months of my life when I didn't end my last relationship soon enough because I didn't want to hurt my GF! That spurred me on to AskMen/DocLove & finally this site!

I don't really have all that many bad AFC incidents, because I spent so little time trying it on with women (because I was CRAP)! I'm sure I missed a load of opportunities though, but luckily didn't realise or don't remember them! I don't anymore because I always assume the sale!

I think my worst AFC incident was when I was 16, on student exchange in France. There were about 50 of us, 25 guys, 25 girls, and the same numbers of French.

Who knows how, but of all the Irish guys at the disco on the last night of the trip, I scored with the hottest French girl there and started making out with her outside. Was good fun that night but nothing too serious (she was only 14).

When I got back home, I started writing to her, the worst kind of AFC sh!t possible, in French (I was practising too - what a nerd, eh?). I told her that I missed her, and couldn't wait for her to come over here (on the return leg). I sent about 4 or 5 letters. She never replied.

When they did come over, she avoided me like the plague, and me in my stupidity didn't realise it was on purpose. Finally her friend had to come over to me halfway through the week and tell me that she wasn't interested. In front of about 15 people...

Gimpage!

Oscar.

 

[Helter Skelter]

My worst AFC moment is most of my life, but I'll try to pick the winner.

There was this girl I worked with who I ended up idolizing. Yes, I idolized her. I think that's worst than oneitis in my opinion. I havn't seen that word used on this board before, but it's fitting.

Anyway, I pretty much figured she was my soulmate an at some point we would finally get together. This went on for 10 years, so I got to hear about all her boyfriends and she would tell me all the stuff they did together. Told me I was like a brother to her too.

She eventually left the job so I had flowers sent to her and I left with it some of the lyrics to that Bette Midler song you know the one "you are the wind beneath my wings" bla bla bla. Just about the gayest song I can think of.

So basically I wasted 10 years of my life on this girl who went off to get married after that..

Now I deserved to be biitch slapped for that.

 

[John Juan]

the first few "loves" of mine really had an AFC-pro on their hands... here's a few highlights:

- joined the HS track team so that I would have the "opportunity" to meet this HB8. she gave me yellow flowers for my birthday and LJBF. she pretended that someone had just kicked a baby when she overheard someone suggest that the two of us should go to prom together.. that one hurt.

- when i first got some, she quickly put me into friendzone. then i'd write songs about how much pain i was in and send her tapes. one time i even ripped up a bunch of pictures of us together and sent them to her, thinking that would change her mind. hello stalker!

- actually had the nerve <gasp> to ask out this girl i had major hots for in college! after our initial coffee date, we would talk on the phone for hours with me, she go for dinner with me, go for hikes, walks, all minus kino. i'd pay for a lot of things. she'd tell me about her english prof who she was (now, looking back) obviously f*cking. mysteriously she didn't have time half the time for us to hang out.. always got the face turn or the kiss on the cheek, and was always kept outside the gate of her apartment... but i kept plowing ahead full AFC speed away for a good eight months..

many years pass of more AFC behavior and me getting married to <then unmercifully divorced from> a 4.5 b1tch from hell. ...

- then the last girl i really loved... now this was the one that brought me to this site.. couldn't figure out what had gone wrong. all of a sudden she just dumps me. we seriously fell for each other, but looking back my AFC ways eventually got in the way. I'd tell her i love her all the time, then she'd less frequently return it, then one day i heard her telling a friend over the phone (who i had not yet met) that i was a "nice" guy.. translation... soon to be LJBF material.. :-( at any rate, i'd buy her flowers all the time, take her out to eat, buy her pets toys and treats, write her love songs, and here's the best one: i was sick as a dog one night, so i go to the grocery store, BUY MYSELF medicine, but also make sure to BUY HER FLOWERS <in addition to more condoms, haha.. at least i had that aspect right >

as you can see, i had a lot of pain to learn from.. am doing much better now thx to everyone here and sosuave.com

maybe all those combined get me into the AFC hall of shame.

-jlc

 

[Ded_Skin_Mask13]

When I was in 7th grade I went looking for the girl's house for 2 hours, even knocking at places she obviously wasn't in.

I found her house, and talked to her some and got a hug and what not. And this was after she rejected me a week before.

DAMN!!!!!! I totally regret doing that.

OH WELL. Now come to think of it, she wasn't so pretty.

 

[Blowfish]

My Worst AFC moves...
Acting Desperate, telling my problems to them, annoying them, calling them all the time, I didn't have a reason to love a girl hahaha... oh! The Mr. niceguy bullsh!t

Now a bunch of girls think Im a low life desperate f@gg0T. But I'll prove them all wrong, I'll prove to them that I ain't that kinda dude anymore, even if it kills me...

 

[McKindley]

You guys think you were AFC. You don’t know the definition of the word.

Senior year of high school. I had already been rejected by the head cheerleader (I don’t know what my overweight, marching band ass was thinking.) My best friend asked me to go with her (yes, my best friend was a girl that had silently LJBFed me YEARS before.) She didn’t want to go with her boyfriend (who was a college drop-out that worked in a gas station) because he had used to go to our high school (and was really popular) so she knew everyone would pay attention to him and not her.

So I take this girl to prom. the tux, payed for everything, the whole nine. All she paid for was a dress she got for 7 dollars at a thrift store. After the prom I didn’nt even ATTEMPT to make a move, because her boyfriend so happened to be a good friend of mine. I was a master AFC, I had actually introduced them. At the after party instead of trying to mack on the girls I knew had gone stag, I debated physics with some nerd because I thought hitting on girls would “not be appropriate.”

Needless to say, at the end of the night I dropped her off at the gas station where boyfriend worked (he worked third shift) and they had sex in the back room while I drove my AFC ass home.

 

[Evo]

i liked this girl last year and i was one of the BIGGEST AFC (AAHHHHHH thinking about just disgust me) *but currenly in BC working to become a dj Thank God *sigh* and my close friend who i kno this girl from spend the night over along with another girl and this lil boy (their mom r very close to eacher other) the next day i was checking stuff out and so happeneds to be near where the girl lives ( i wonder y) and my friend (his is like a bro to me) calls me and ask me to come to her house to pick up the lil boy and take him to school for him and i said to her house "yes" i was at her house for like 10 mins and end up spending a whole day with this annoying boy cuz, i was taking him to school and back home while my bro(so much for being a bro, using me ) get to stay at her house all day cuz i just did his job for him (he was the one who was supposed to take that lil kid to school) AAHHHHHHH i can believe i have him use me so i can see this girl for 10 mins i wish someone could have beat me up that day for the stupid AFC i am.

 

[Demon of the Fall]

OK... I think this will be the worse, not so much because of the AFC things I did (don't worry, there were a lot of them) but because this girl was mine before I even knew it. All I had to do is reach my hand and get her... Oh and btw, this is my first post here, I'll interduce myself later on


So here I go, bare with me, it might be long... It was the start of the 11th grade, I just moved to a new school and though I was the biggest anti-social nerd back home, I actually got to a good start over there and were enjoying my life. So this girl comes along. She was beautiful, I mean totally stunning but oddly enough I didn't care about her that much. Probably because all the guys I knew wanted her and I had other things to do such as getting used to living in a different country.

Of course all the guys trying to pick her up fail horribly (one of them being my best friend, and the best natural DJ I have ever met, but I'll mention him later). So yeah time goes by and I spend my lunch breaks playing guitar on the floor's balcony. And this chick starts to show interest in me. She's being all flirty and **** and asks me if I could come to her house and teach her how to play. To this I reply with a smooth "I can't teach you, you don't have a guitar" to which she replies with "no, just show me how to hold it, you know, sit behind me and hold my hands"(!). Of course being the AFC I was, I didn't really get what she ment (Or maybe I did, I just didn't have the balls to do it)...

Anyways, time goes by, and she's all over me. We sat next to each other at the bus, she used to sit on me and be extremely touchy and flirty. At one point this guy from the bus tried to hit on her, so she tells him "DOTF is my b/f" and proceeds to hug me and hold me. To make this short, the girl was all over me, giving me the biggest signs one can possibly want but I did nothing. Then like the AFC I was, all of a sudden I decided I was in love with her. So the ritual began, I wrote her SMSes, told her best friend I really liked her (very dumb move), called her all the time etc. And while she responded well at start, I never actually did anything. Hell we both been drunk this one night and she sat on my lap and I didn't even get the guts to raise my hands and hold her...

Anyways, time goes by and my best friend comes to the equation. Like I said, this guy is amazing, at first we all thought he was a loser, but after a few months when he got all the hot chicks from school including the ones who turned him down when he just came (probably cuz he couldn't really speak English at that point and he had this geeky German metality). So anyways, "my girl" starts to fall in love with him, he didn't do anything because he really hated her... But slowly do I start to realise that the only reason she's hanging out with me is to be close to him. And yet, while realizing this I don't do anything because hey, I figured out that if she's around she might make a move or something... God was I pathetic. A typical day would be like:

Me calling her: hey would you like to go play pool or something?
Her: Ah not really...
Me: Ok... Cus some of us though about playing and I really want you to come along beacuse I realy enjoy your company and blah blah blah...
Her: Oh. Who's going?
Me: Well its me, someone, someone, best friend and someone.
Her: Oh really? When are you guys going?!

Yeah... OUCH. So at one point at least I got some of my dignity back and I stopped talking to her. Though I constantly thought about her. If there is one event in my life that forced me to want to change is this one. I guess all of us have an achilles heel, well this chick is mine's. Its all good though, the harder the fall the more you learn from your mistakes.

 

[MVPlaya]

Originally posted by DMotUJ de Florida
Wow, some good AFC moves here!

However, I won't be outdone that quickly http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/smile.gif

The first chick that I was infatuated with, when I was 17... that will be one lesson in AFCiness I won't forget soon (though sometimes I wish I would).

I thought this girl was an 11 (even though she was a 6 - 7)... forget putting her on a pedestal, I had her on the damn Empire State Building!

One day she told me that she thought my hairstyle was old, two hours later I had a new hairstyle.

We were in a store... she looked at a hat and said "that's a pretty cool hat." 5 minutes later the hat was on her head... she didn't even have to ask me to get it for her.

These two were only minor examples of my shining example of AFCiness. Here's the one that takes the cake though...

One day she and I were talking, and she tells me that she's always wanted to bytch slap someone. Of course, I eagerly volunteer. Just thinking back to that slap she gave me, my cheecks still sting.

And the worst part - she tells all our friends that I let her bytch slap me - AND I WAS PROUD of it because she paid attention to me!!!

(Excuse me for a minute while I take some heartburn medicine... I'm getting indigestion thinking about it all http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/smile.gif

And to add icing to the cake...

I had initially told the girl that I liked her, and was promptly LJBFed for my efforts. I was persistent though, and got her to be interested in me (she even told my sister that she imagined us doing the wild thing).

However, needless to say, I blew it major time with my AFC behavior.

Oh well... live and learn.

Master of the Universe

ARE YOU $H!TT!NG ME? No disrespect, you are, after all, the embodiment of all that is divine and a continual source to our humble tribes, yet we were under the impression that you were a good who fell down from the skies to help us mortals, not a mortal who moved up.

Anyhoo? How old were you? Not even my MOST AFC OF AFC moves resembles that by even 1% percentage point. I can say I have bought women stuff they wanted, but to just volunteer to be slapped by her and her friends is just beyong me.

Anway, you're a mudda $#!*ing pimp now so just remember the past and enjoy the present.

 

[B9]

ROFL, I am cringing as I read this thread!

Aiken's has to be the saddest story and would take the prize, if not for the fact that MotU was actually PROUD of being b1tch-slapped! LOL, congrats, MotU!

Mine: I had the oneitis bad for this chick (a 7) in my class. She liked me a lot, but of course I never did anything about it and stayed in the friendzone. Anyway, we were having lunch one day and she was complaining to me about how she didn't have a boyfriend anymore and how her ex sucked! I know, I know.....

My solution? I set her up with one of my best friends also from my class! Christ, I had to get over it by ignoring the hell out of them, lambasting my friend for being such an AFC pushover to her and trivialising her whenever I had the opportunity. Didn't help me to get over her of course (if only I had learned to transplant this attitude to other women, but no...). So, when they broke up, she came running to me of course. And my reaction? Sure, I'll be your support in this time of need.... Well, that did mean that I could stop ignoring my friend though (sheesh, talk about being an emotional pisshead....). Of course, I was helplessly friendzoned from that point on and they did get back together. Well, I got over it eventually, by getting a new oneitis for someone I barely knew and saying yes to buy her a drink only for her to walk away as soon as the glass was empty (never buy drinks for girls). A few weeks later, a HB 9 made the most blatant attempt tp get in my pants (you can read about this AFC ****-up in another thread like this here) and that was when I decided this had to end and I found this site.

My friend and the former oneitis are still together to this day.... I still hang out with my friend though I hardly ever see her. When I do run into her at the rare party, she tends to follow me around like a moth to a flame. She's alright, but by now, it kinda annoys me as it is disturbing my DJing.

 

[Cassidy]

I've been reading through this thread and laughing, but all of you guys are amateurs compared to me when it comes to being an AFC. I'll post my second most embarrassing AFC experience because the most embarrassing is enough to reduce grown men to tears...

I was 15, and this pretty girl (about an HB7, but I thought she was an HB9, LOL) asked me if I liked her. Now, I only vaguely knew her, as we went to the same high school and everything, except she was in the grade below me.

Now, she had such a nice ass, but I figured I'd play hard to get, so I asked her what it would mean if I did actually like her. She said that it would 'bring us closer'. At this time, she also had a boyfriend.

As she said this, images of her being my f*ckbuddy flew about my head. What happened in reality was actually quite far from this...

I admitted that I did like her, and what ensued was a brief existence of feeling her up and the suchlike, but she would never accept to come out with me on dates outside school. That p*ssed me off.

I thought, in my best AFC way, that the way to persuade her to come out with me was to get her a gift. Or gifts.

In return, I found out that she broke up with her boyfriend and got a new one, all in the time that me and her were 'fooling around'. She didn't bother to tell me this, and still enjoyed the attention I was freely lavishing upon her.

This led to me getting angry and doing the most DJish thing I'd ever done in my life. I cut off all contact with her. That was also about the time I found SoSuave.

About a month or two after I'd NEXTed her, she started going up to my friends and telling them that she really likes me and went out with her second boyfriend 'by mistake'.

Confused b*tch.

I still don't speak to her. She still has a nice ass, though.

 

[Skel]

I use to make love song tapes and give them to girls. GOsh it hurts to think about it still.

 

[WrEcKLeSS2000]

Well WORST AFC MOVE...I wrote a sort of a love letter to this girl a few years ago...!!!! ughh...Do I even have to continue....Also...I called this girl up who i never met that was a couple years older than me...cause I got her number from someone anyway...I started lying saying I was older than I was and one day i told her truth about my age....haha... BAD MOVES!!!!!