So I am a manager and she is an employee that I have to supervise. She had a boyfriend for a long time and we always flirted, but they ended it and now she is on the rebound. We flirt now more than ever but I'm not sure how to ask her out. It's against work policy to date another employee, but I've never been one to follow rules too well anyway lol. How can I ask her out?
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Want to ask out coworker..how?
- Thread starter dice
- Start date
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Iceberg
Master Don Juan
You already have a somewhat friendly relationship with her. Just invite her out for drinks and see where it goes.
Asking a person out doesnt necessarily have to sound like "Want to go on a date?"
It's more like "Let's grab a drink."
Throughout the course of the night, you can try to escalate some kino and see if she's receptive.
Asking a person out doesnt necessarily have to sound like "Want to go on a date?"
It's more like "Let's grab a drink."
Throughout the course of the night, you can try to escalate some kino and see if she's receptive.
email - it's the best way. I've dated lots of girls from work. Try to get her personal email using company email if she starts replying.
Beware though - I had one girl start dating another guy from our office after I broke up with her - it drove me crazy and really made me depressed to hear her giggling in his office.
Beware though - I had one girl start dating another guy from our office after I broke up with her - it drove me crazy and really made me depressed to hear her giggling in his office.
WhitePimp
Master Don Juan
I got fired for dating a coworker. It truly sucked, and I felt horrible losing my job over something as stupid as a workplace fling. Plus, you're her supervisor which is massive NO-NO...it's got harassment all over it if things go south.
Unless your job is easily replaceable, just be friends and that's it. I understand the thrill of getting some workplace strange, but if your company has a policy against it, then it's not worth the risk.
*if you're going to go through with it, do like Iceberg said and just ask her out for a drink after work; every post-work drink with a chick always ends up with a hook-up
Unless your job is easily replaceable, just be friends and that's it. I understand the thrill of getting some workplace strange, but if your company has a policy against it, then it's not worth the risk.
*if you're going to go through with it, do like Iceberg said and just ask her out for a drink after work; every post-work drink with a chick always ends up with a hook-up
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
Jeffst1980
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 22, 2008
- Messages
- 834
- Reaction score
- 131
Better start sending out your resume, while you're at it.
Fred_Scuttle
Don Juan
- Joined
- May 17, 2011
- Messages
- 105
- Reaction score
- 45
if you value your job, don't dip your pen in the company ink.
oneboy21
Senior Don Juan
A Big No-No for dating co-workers
she may be using you right now for some rebound, so don't do it.
If you really want to impress her you can arrange a get together with all your colleagues at a bar or any place and you can run your game.
No Emails please, they can be dangerous, no IM's too.
If she asks you out that's a different story.
she may be using you right now for some rebound, so don't do it.
If you really want to impress her you can arrange a get together with all your colleagues at a bar or any place and you can run your game.
No Emails please, they can be dangerous, no IM's too.
If she asks you out that's a different story.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.