Walk away

[Foe]

So been seeing this girl for about 6 months, shes my type and I proper like her. Shes non commital, wants to maintain her independance and "just wants casual". Ok so be it. She has this guy living downstairs with his misses, shes pretty average, he's got potential but they have been together for 15 years so they are LTR as F. I go over one time and they are all having drinks, the girl I like is wearing this hot as hell pair of skintight pink short tights. Im watching her in front of this guy and his girl and thinking there is no way in hell he's not noticing this.

Anyway they break up, I saw this girl on Friday and we see each other about once every two weeks or so. We have fun as usual and i notice the girl is living downstairs but the guy is not, must have moved out. Im in a bar last night and this guy comes up to me, he's a friendly type and tells me I should walk away. I say why, he wont say. Im drunk and he goes off into the carpark. So Im stewing on this, get pissed off and run to the car park and corner him ready to get violent to be honest. He wont say a ****ing word.

Anyway, I look at his facebook this morning and he has her pinned in a thousand photos they must hang out quite a bit. Tell me he isnt working on his own agenda.

 

[Novice1]

Sabotage?

 

[ThisIsSparta]

Tell me he isnt working on his own agenda.

What difference does it make to you?

If it isnt him, its the next guy.

That woman is a hoe, she is for the streets and you would fight over her?

 

[BackInTheGame78]

It's obvious she is fvcking other guys with her wanting to be casual. Ready to get violent because you are dating a fvcking ho?

Get real.

Listen to this song on repeat until it gets through to you:

"shes a ho, D how the fvck you know...
every time i see the ho shes with a new negro...
shes the type of ho thats bound...
to wear shorts up her ass when your friends come around...
shes the kinda ho that'll make you cry...
the kinda ho you have to call before you come by...
so why do you wanna kill when she says no more...
you aint the first to be dumped by a goddamned wh0re...
crazy motherfvckers fighting over hoes
stealing for their asses and jumping out of windows...
if a ho wants out i let her sinky ass go
cos ima let a ho be a ho"

You gotta let a ho be a ho...

 

[Divorced w 3]

A question you should ask yourself is, what have you done in this situation to make her think she’s anything but a casual hookup for you either. If you are doing the drink and casual hookup act, you would be deluded in thinking that she would look at you as a serious partner. Did you catch feelings in a situation where there was a mutual contract that nothing was serious?

I’ve dated a few women that had phases like this prior to meeting me and they turned out to be ultra submissive. You’re leaving something out here, most likely.

 

[Divorced w 3]

It's obvious she is fvcking other guys with her wanting to be casual. Ready to get violent because you are dating a fvcking ho?

Get real.

Listen to this song on repeat until it gets through to you:

"shes a ho, D how the fvck you know...
every time i see the ho shes with a new negro...
shes the type of ho thats bound...
to wear shorts up her ass when your friends come around...
shes the kinda ho that'll make you cry...
the kinda ho you have to call before you come by...
so why do you wanna kill when she says no more...
you aint the first to be dumped by a goddamned wh0re...
crazy motherfvckers fighting over hoes
stealing for their asses and jumping out of windows...
if a ho wants out i let her sinky ass go
cos ima let a ho be a ho"

You gotta let a ho be a ho...

Double standard.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Double standard.

In what way?

 

[Divorced w 3]

In what way?

If he was noncommittal and had a few women on rotation, nobody would bat an eye. In this instance, she’s got him on rotation and it’s an issue? Or to quote Jay Z - men shouldn’t be jealous, that’s a female trait.

 

[Bigpapa]

I’ve dated a few women that had phases like this prior to meeting me and they turned out to be ultra submissive. You’re leaving something out here, most likely.

Most likely the guy she wants is keeping her in rotation / ignores her and she keeps the op around because she likes his attention

it could have been worse, like the op just being kept in a platonic state

OP should take things as they are and stop pushing for an LTR as she clearly does not see him more than an option. If an LTR would happen it would happen because she settled with him and this again does not leads anywhere good down the line

 

[BackInTheGame78]

If he was noncommittal and had a few women on rotation, nobody would bat an eye. In this instance, she’s got him on rotation and it’s an issue? Or to quote Jay Z - men shouldn’t be jealous, that’s a female trait.

Exactly...if he isn't OK with it then walk away. No reason to be getting mad and trying to get upset with a dude for letting him know

 

[Divorced w 3]

Exactly...if he isn't OK with it then walk away. No reason to be getting mad and trying to get upset with a dude for letting him know

I had this happen once. I was out with my boys and we met a two set and the guy that tagged along. Guy who tagged along was hanging off of the hot one and ended up telling me that her apartment was a revolving door of men. So what did I do? Doubled down on that girl who ended up jumping on my hips later that evening. You can guess where that went from there. It’s all about how you perceive the situation. OP needs to step back and see it for what it is.

A couple months later, I saw her at the gym working out with her fiancée.

 

[Clockwerk50]

I have so many questions. What is the relationship between the couple downstairs and this girl? Why did a 15-year relationship end so quickly? Do they do this often? And why are you so emotionally invested in what this guy has to say to you instead of asking this girl?

Look, I’m sure you’ve received enough information about female behavioural theory. All I’ll say is that I hope you have a plan for how you’ll handle things if you decide to end it, if she ends it, how to handle the breakup depending on how it ends, or if you both eventually end up in an LTR. Understand what you’re getting into. You’ve been seeing her for six months, so you should consider all these possibilities, especially if you can’t have sex constantly without getting emotionally attached.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I have so many questions. What is the relationship between the couple downstairs and this girl? Why did a 15-year relationship end so quickly? Do they do this often? And why are you so emotionally invested in what this guy has to say to you instead of asking this girl?

Look, I’m sure you’ve received enough information about female behavioural theory. All I’ll say is that I hope you have a plan for how you’ll handle things if you decide to end it, if she ends it, how to handle the breakup depending on how it ends, or if you both eventually end up in an LTR. Understand what you’re getting into. You’ve been seeing her for six months, so you should consider all these possibilities, especially if you can’t have sex constantly without getting emotionally attached.

OP already knows the truth. He is just mad because the man telling him made him face a reality he doesn't want to

 

[Foe]

To be honest its been a few days and its left a really sour taste in my mouth. I cant think of a good explanation other then she's told him something or he's seen something that I wouldn't be ok with. Either way I'm over it. Im not going to call her again.

Also she rings me up after I tell her about this BS and you should have seen her. Worst convo ever, rings me with nothing to say, shes flat as, pretends to small talk. After about 5 mins of this Im like OK.....And...... Then she says "Oh, do you want to talk about what whats his name said"? Im like "nah not really". Then she started asking questions about how the conversation went, what was said etc etc. In hindsight she was paranoid as. Something fishy is going on and Im bailing.

 

[obelisk]

Consider the sour taste a really inexpensive wake up call. You caught feels not her. Find the good sense to walk away because you chose to. Plenty of other women like her out there.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

To be honest its been a few days and its left a really sour taste in my mouth. I cant think of a good explanation other then she's told him something or he's seen something that I wouldn't be ok with. Either way I'm over it. Im not going to call her again.

Also she rings me up after I tell her about this BS and you should have seen her. Worst convo ever, rings me with nothing to say, shes flat as, pretends to small talk. After about 5 mins of this Im like OK.....And...... Then she says "Oh, do you want to talk about what whats his name said"? Im like "nah not really". Then she started asking questions about how the conversation went, what was said etc etc. In hindsight she was paranoid as. Something fishy is going on and Im bailing.

Too invested in someone you shouldn't have been based on what she had earned.