Fruitbat
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- May 3, 2013
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- 3,307
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So, serious question and well considered replies appreciated.
Having read a lot of Pook, and others, one of the key topics is about not making women the sole focus of your life and the validator of your self-esteem.
Many times we think we have this nailed and only a breakup or rejection can empower waves of self-limiting dejection. Despite all ones efforts, it seems our validation is hard-wired.
Years ago, I had a plate who had to leave to pursue a career in a new city. I felt the pain and so did she as we were very fond of each other. However, we knew it couldn't work.
This, I coped with. However, I noted when I was seeing her, the fear of losing her to another man was absolutely insurmountable. She herself was not what I feared, losing her to another was what I feared.
So, this is an interesting aside. However, the question is:
How do you make your life project the focus and tune out the rest?
Given women offer immortality, is this hardwired into our brains?
How does one develop the perspective to concentrate on goals rather than a harem or a woman?
The irony that the focus on goals creates the harem itself, but what perspectives can lead a man there?
Having read a lot of Pook, and others, one of the key topics is about not making women the sole focus of your life and the validator of your self-esteem.
Many times we think we have this nailed and only a breakup or rejection can empower waves of self-limiting dejection. Despite all ones efforts, it seems our validation is hard-wired.
Years ago, I had a plate who had to leave to pursue a career in a new city. I felt the pain and so did she as we were very fond of each other. However, we knew it couldn't work.
This, I coped with. However, I noted when I was seeing her, the fear of losing her to another man was absolutely insurmountable. She herself was not what I feared, losing her to another was what I feared.
So, this is an interesting aside. However, the question is:
How do you make your life project the focus and tune out the rest?
Given women offer immortality, is this hardwired into our brains?
How does one develop the perspective to concentrate on goals rather than a harem or a woman?
The irony that the focus on goals creates the harem itself, but what perspectives can lead a man there?