You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
In creating initial interest, all of these things certainly matter. While confidence is grand, it only can come into play after the first perception has been made. Let's take two extreme examples, a bum and a politician. The bum is dressed in rags, with a weather-beaten face and a smell that would make a dog sniff his own butt. The politician has a $4999 suit with the latest in lapel styles, and smells slightly of soap and an expensive, designer cologne. The bum has confidence, the politician doesn't. And the winner is????Originally posted by lao tzu
Your car doesn't matter, your clothes don;'t matter, your ****adoodle doo don't matter. Are you confident? Are you you? If they don;t like it so be it. God dang it find a clue.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Don't get me wrong, but I think YOU are the one who doesn't get it yet. There's no doubt clothes DO MATTER as well as your looks, but those things are just NOT ENOUGH.Originally posted by lao tzu
You still don't get it.
IT DOESNT MATTER. IF you are not butt ugly, then it doesn't matter. Be you, be funny, don't try to impress, don';t funking think, feel, use the force. But still be the best you you can be and always strive to be better. Women love it and if they don't funk em. BE you and you will get what you want, treat em like your buddy, but demonstrate your sexual power.
Just talk to them and engage them, everywhere all the time and it will all become second nature.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.