"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

Trash talking ex

Rawksteddy

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 29, 2019
Messages
47
Reaction score
24
Age
34
I was hanging out with some random chick. And she was asking questions about my ex. And I trash talked the ex. Then we added each other to Facebook. And they’re friends. Lol. This situation could lead to a lot of drama. Should I just block the ex??
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

GioWolf

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 7, 2020
Messages
213
Reaction score
448
Age
45
Trash talking an ex means she did something to anger you, which may demonstrate lower value. If you are a high value man, women don’t do things to anger you. It also means she’s still on your mind and pining over her. If you were over her, you wouldn’t care what she did.
 

Rawksteddy

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 29, 2019
Messages
47
Reaction score
24
Age
34
Trash talking an ex means she did something to anger you, which may demonstrate lower value. If you are a high value man, women don’t do things to anger you. It also means she’s still on your mind and pining over her. If you were over her, you wouldn’t care what she did.
Bro she cheated on me
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

Read more...

BackInTheGame78

Moderator
Joined
Sep 10, 2014
Messages
16,874
Reaction score
19,110
I was hanging out with some random chick. And she was asking questions about my ex. And I trash talked the ex. Then we added each other to Facebook. And they’re friends. Lol. This situation could lead to a lot of drama. Should I just block the ex??
Dumb move. Never trash your ex, it makes you look petty and can do nothing but ruin your chances with a new woman. There is no positive outcome from doing so.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

RickTheToad

Moderator
Joined
Apr 21, 2018
Messages
6,603
Reaction score
5,138
Location
Bridgeport, CT
I was hanging out with some random chick. And she was asking questions about my ex. And I trash talked the ex. Then we added each other to Facebook. And they’re friends. Lol. This situation could lead to a lot of drama. Should I just block the ex??
You should never trash talk an ex. You just say it never worked out and we just drifted apart. You wish her the best and hopes she finds what she's looking for. You know why? Simple, she can internalize this and thing well, if we do not work out, then this dude is going to bad mouth me to others too.

Get it?
 

Visionist

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 27, 2016
Messages
837
Reaction score
876
Age
38
Girls also look at you in terms of your value and how you will affect their value.

All girls cheat, or want to cheat, but practically all of them want to pretend to be "good girls".

She doesn't want you spoiling her image down the line when she monkey branches from you. Image is everything to women. The idea that they are less superficial than men is grade AAA comedy. All they have is their image. Men have hobbies and pursuits.
 

Black Widow Void

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 24, 2010
Messages
2,153
Reaction score
3,796
. It also means she’s still on your mind and pining over her. If you were over her, you wouldn’t care what she did.
That’s your fault. You became unattractive to her. She wasn’t yours, it was just your turn.
@Rawksteddy


I see that you are a bit newer here. Don't let postings like the above give you the wrong impression about most forum members. Unfortunately, there's always going to be a few members that feel helpless in their own lives... and so they reach for the most overused canned-phrases and offer no actual constructive criticism (for a person with a low-self image, this offers them some quasi opportunity to feel 'empowered.')

Back to the subject:
Speaking about an ex on a current date isn't a good idea. This sub-communicates to the new date that you are still affected for the former gal. Also women are typically vanity creatures and crave recognition (this includes the ex that still had/has you as a social media friend .. and the current girl you've mentioned).

As far as women that cheat--- sometimes women are habitual cheaters and if their previous 'boyfriends' accepted this behavior, and as a result, they are more prone to do it again. Sounds like you put your foot down with the ex and demonstrated that you weren't willing to look the other way.
 

Baibars

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 14, 2020
Messages
540
Reaction score
559
Age
32
Location
Germany
Because you were not man enough for her devotion and loyalty.
Yes, thats the reason in her eyes but he was not fully responsible for all of her actions. He is responsible for his own live and if he allows cheating.
Even if he was man enough she could be a person that would cheat sooner or later. Being a man guarantees not lifelong devotion and loyalty from a particullar girl.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Roober

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 2, 2016
Messages
2,372
Reaction score
2,120
I often take the high road with exes, coworkers, family and friends... Regardless of what they have done to me in the past. Talking trash is the result of harboring anger and resentment, which means they are renting real estate in your heart and mind. And this is rent free. I do not approve of anyone looting anything from my hard work, especially the real estate in my mind.

It does nobody any good, and often just makes you look bad in the process. Think about it. It is absolutely pointless, other than momentary relief of frustrations or a bad mood.

I will admit that I do slip sometimes in moments of frustration, but get back on track once I recognize my weakness.
 

Rawksteddy

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 29, 2019
Messages
47
Reaction score
24
Age
34
@Rawksteddy


I see that you are a bit newer here. Don't let postings like the above give you the wrong impression about most forum members. Unfortunately, there's always going to be a few members that feel helpless in their own lives... and so they reach for the most overused canned-phrases and offer no actual constructive criticism (for a person with a low-self image, this offers them some quasi opportunity to feel 'empowered.')

Back to the subject:
Speaking about an ex on a current date isn't a good idea. This sub-communicates to the new date that you are still affected for the former gal. Also women are typically vanity creatures and crave recognition (this includes the ex that still had/has you as a social media friend .. and the current girl you've mentioned).

As far as women that cheat--- sometimes women are habitual cheaters and if their previous 'boyfriends' accepted this behavior, and as a result, they are more prone to do it again. Sounds like you put your foot down with the ex and demonstrated that you weren't willing to look the other way.
I guess deep down I’ve left the door open for some sort of reconciliation with my ex. And things with her have been on and off again. I suppose if I were to unfriend her, it’d impose a certain element of finality to the whole thing and that’s probably a good choice. I haven’t been contacting her or anything.

On Thursday I went out to the bar and got too drunk and blacked out. I woke up Friday morning with some random girl next to me. I kicked her out and just spent my day kinda hung over.

Then last night, the girl that I had been trash talking to hit me up and asked if I wanted to hang out. But I was too hungover so I told her that I had to work in the morning, but we should make plans for when I’m free. She hasn’t responded yet but I’m sure she will eventually.
 

dude99

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 1, 2016
Messages
2,550
Reaction score
3,105
Age
53
Bro she cheated on me
When they cheat on you, you cut all ties, including facebook, and you walk away. They no longer exist. You dont trash talk, insult or speak bad of them they are just someone you used to know and now are no longer a part of your life-- ever again.

Trash talking shows you are still harboring feelings for them. Harboring feelings for a cheater is counter productive. You cut ties. You walk away.

Yes. Delete her from your facebook.
 

Rawksteddy

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 29, 2019
Messages
47
Reaction score
24
Age
34
When they cheat on you, you cut all ties, including facebook, and you walk away. They no longer exist. You dont trash talk, insult or speak bad of them they are just someone you used to know and now are no longer a part of your life-- ever again.

Trash talking shows you are still harboring feelings for them. Harboring feelings for a cheater is counter productive. You cut ties. You walk away.

Yes. Delete her from your facebook.
Okay. Deleted
 

logicallefty

Moderator
Joined
Apr 26, 2006
Messages
6,000
Reaction score
5,151
Age
52
Location
Northeast Florida, USA
This is why I don't have a FB in my real name. I only use it for work (police) with phony names and phony friends. There is just no risk over reward for having social media anymore, IMO. With texting and long distance phone calling a thing of the past, we can connect to anyone in private without the world knowing. That's my favorite option.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

Top