"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Transitioning to phone help

S

sigma335

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Ok so im trying to number close this girl on pof. New to online dating. Here is the last message she sent me. First contacted her a few days ago.

Her: hey, dont think that i am smart and everybody loves me ok, just kidding but im cool and no, i dont like to cook but sometimes i do do u


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What I have written to send her(would be my 3rd message sending her). I have failed to get past 1 or 2 messages with a few girls now and only number closed 1 fugly chick to give me some confidence.

Me: I like to eat more than I like to cook lol Hey playing email tag on here is pretty lame. How bout you give me your phone number and we go from there?



I feel like it is too scripted. Also english is not her 1st language. I am not sweating this chick(HB 7.5) btw but trying to improve my skills here. Thanks.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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D

DondottaJuanpappa

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sigma335 said:
Me: I like to eat more than I like to cook lol Hey playing email tag on here is pretty lame. How bout you give me your phone number and we go from there?
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^^^This was good to seal the number deal.

sigma335 said:
What I have written to send her(would be my 3rd message sending her). I have failed to get past 1 or 2 messages with a few girls now and only number closed 1 fugly chick to give me some confidence.
Click to expand...
^^^This on the other hand shows signs of neediness and seeking approval.
 
L

lakeshore

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i don't like your response at all.

Every girl that messaged me back more then once I was able to number close with this.

"So at what point do we exchange numbers?"

"mine is xxx-xxx-xxxx"

Then they either call me or they leave their number on the following email.

Simple.


So, just write:

I'm cooking right now!

So at what point do we exchange numbers?

mine is xxx-xxx-xxxx
 
S

sigma335

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DondottaJuanpappa said:
^^^This was good to seal the number deal.

Ok

^^^This on the other hand shows signs of neediness and seeking approval.
Click to expand...
Trying to fix where I thought I was going wrong. Previously I went for the number after the initial message. My mindset is a work in progress.

DondottaJuanpappa said:
Do you know what it is you want from her?
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She is cute and has some qualities I like in a woman. As of right now...I want to see if she looks like her pics irl.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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I

Iceberg

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sigma335 said:
Trying to fix where I thought I was going wrong. Previously I went for the number after the initial message. My mindset is a work in progress.
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I don't know much about internet dating, but I like your approach. You're too cool for the email exchange, let's stop dancing around on the internet and exchange numbers. Sounds good to me, man.

Definitely don't water that down with "At what point do we exchange numbers?" It just takes all the testosterone out of what you already wrote, and makes you sound like a tax accountant.
 
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