"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Took bad drug

mrpickles666

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I took a tranquilizing pill that activated my depression. I was standing in front of this girl silent and in my head while my friend was talking to her (he wasn't trying to game her, he was just making friendly conversation). I had my hands behind my back (one hand cupping wrist) and he made a joke "you're standing like a soldier." In response to this she mimicked a soldier's stance and I laughed it off saying "I am a soldier." I'm worried that I conveyed stiffness and uptightness.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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TheVirtualMind

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What is your question?
I'm trying to figure out the same thing...

Hell, I'm trying to figure out if this belongs in "Discussion," "Health and Fitness," "Anything Else," or "Unusual Techniques in Seduction."
 

mrpickles666

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My question: would me having my hands behind my back (hand holding wrist) coupled with my friend's observational joke of it and her response (mimicking standing like a soldier) leave a permanent impression of me being stiff? The question comes from my negative depressed thoughts. I'd like to talk to her when I'm in a better mood but I feel awkward now because of what I did. Chances are I'm gonna see her again but I'm concerned that I've started to burn a bridge with the demeanor I had tonight
 

mrpickles666

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My game is often affected by my depression. When I'm down on myself, my ability to be a DJ gets impeded by my medical condition. I did a foolish thing by taking a drug that exacerbated it and I feel bad about myself. I need to learn how to talk to girls inspite of my moods.
 

Yewki

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My question: would me having my hands behind my back (hand holding wrist) coupled with my friend's observational joke of it and her response (mimicking standing like a soldier) leave a permanent impression of me being stiff?
The answer to your question is irrelevant. You should be asking different questions.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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Chamber36

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Don't take any drugs dude.

Work on your confidence. Keep studying/working, keep your house clean, keep yourself clean, brush your teeth, comb your hair, dress well, be polite.

And don't be a "Woe is me!!" type of guy. That's the biggest turn-off ever, unless you want to attract chicks that cut themselves.

Finally: Someone telling you that you are like a soldier is a compliment imo.

What are you some kind of hippy anarchist that hates anything to do with discipline and masculinity? Be a fvckin soldier.
 

mrpickles666

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Don't take any drugs dude.

Work on your confidence. Keep studying/working, keep your house clean, keep yourself clean, brush your teeth, comb your hair, dress well, be polite.

And don't be a "Woe is me!!" type of guy. That's the biggest turn-off ever, unless you want to attract chicks that cut themselves.

Finally: Someone telling you that you are like a soldier is a compliment imo.

What are you some kind of hippy anarchist that hates anything to do with discipline and masculinity? Be a fvckin soldier.
Funny you should say it was a compliment. I actually told the guy I had a problem with what he said earlier today and we are no longer friends. The comment itself didn't bother me. I projected my low mood onto it and it did. I regret standing near my friend and that girl at the time. It left me vulnerable at the wrong time for me. When I'm not in a bad mood, I have no problem socializing. Especially with girls.
 

FairShake

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I'm sure she forgot about it.

He probably forgot it until you told him he had a problem with it.

You need to forget about it.

No relationship hinges on one single momentary interaction.
 
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