"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Too late to approach?

bennymd

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Since there is a 3 second rule, is it too late to approach if you go way past that? What if you were getting IOI's?

Problem is, I'm talking weeks past. I guess I'm still recovering from a break-up (long term relationship), but I want to get back into dating now. I've noticed I've been getting a lot of IOI's from a few cute girls at the gym. I sometimes catch their glances and I notice they'll frequently come near me. One girl always manages to subtly hop on the elliptical next to mine when I start my workout.

It's weird though, I definitely feel this tension but it seems strange to try to bust out with some opener after all this time. It's like if I wanted to approach them, why didn't I do it a month ago and wait all this time? I'm guessing I should just chalk it up to lesson learned, and to try to approach faster in these situations next time. Besides, I feel like there's been so much expectation built up my anxiety would be through the roof.

But I'm interested in hearing if anyone else has been in this situation before and successfully opened anyway? Or if anyone else has some advice? Thx.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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rocky_mtn

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No, the 3 second rule is a technique not to chicken out. I think the 3s rule is misunderstood. Its from the moment you actually decide to make your approach, you have 3 seconds to follow through so that you don't chicken out. It may take minutes or hours to scope out a joint, make your rounds, make eye contact, see who is single and who isn't.

When the moment is ripe to approach then use the 3 second rule, but it can take some time to get setup for the right target.
 

bennymd

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Thanks, I get that point. I probably shouldn't have even mentioned the whole 3 second thing I was just referring to it. Any advice on the specific situation?
 

Bay area pimp

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You might want to make sure your balls are still attached. It's never too late. Just dont put it off any longer :up:
 

Krang!

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Blah - the rules are guidelines to get you into the right mindset, the right attitude - not absolute truths. Way more worth than reading the bible over and over again is to go out and gain some experience with your newfound knowledge. A well analyzed C&B is worth gold!

Now on your specific situation, I can't see the problem. Sounds like a great oppurtunity to say "Hi" next time... seeing that you guys have seen each other around alot it would be a natural thing to do eh? Take it from there and remember to have fun! :up:
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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