"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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To those who still have their v-cards, how far have you gone with a girl?

SoSuave virgins, how far have you gotten with a girl?

  • Virgin and have never kissed a girl

    Votes: 7 20.6%
  • Virgin but have kissed a girl (or first base)

    Votes: 3 8.8%
  • Virgin but have felt up a girl (or second base)

    Votes: 2 5.9%
  • Virgin but have fingered a girl (or third base)

    Votes: 4 11.8%
  • Virgin but have given/received oral sex

    Votes: 3 8.8%
  • I am not a virgin

    Votes: 15 44.1%

  • Total voters
    34

MrJibbles

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I am just curious to see where I stand, sexually-speaking, in comparison with some of the other virgins on this site. Personally, besides never having fvcked a girl, I have never kissed one. Some of us here, though virgins, may have at least gained hook-ups. On what part of the spectrum do you lie, SoSuave members?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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BatJuan

Don Juan
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I think there's some notion that most virgins haven't had sex because they suck with women, or that they will eventually succumb to temptation. When I was 15 years old I posted something on a message board saying I'd wait until marriage, and this guy called me out saying that I should "wait until I grow up" and to get back to him in five years. In the subsequent five year period I had several girlfriends, including the obligatory extreme face-sucking make out sessions, and I even had one chick begging me to bang her while we were alone in this secluded park, but I stood my ground. Five years later I messaged the guy back, much to his surprise, and now at almost 24 years of age, I still haven't changed my views.

I just don't feel the need to be sexually active (despite the biological urges), so my activity is generally limited to kissing. I guess some of the heavy stuff could be considered feeling someone up, but I'm not one of those touchy-feely kind of guys.
 

Eternal_water

Master Don Juan
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when we were little kids growing up and were still in primary school and had very little knowledge of sex, me and the girl next door used to experiment getting naked in bed and doing various things with each other and we always noted it felt good and exciting when my c**k rubbed against her v****a.

Several years later we found out why lol.

I've had one girlfriend when I was 17/18 for around 10 months. we did a fair amount of kissing and our fair share of neck kissing and some full on face sucking makeouts and I touched her up a bit but we never had sex. Eventually she dumped me cos she said we didn't see each other enough.

No action since, still a virgin.
 

Ihateinitiatingalot7

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i'm 24, i've done everything except for sticking it in, so no penetration, i've kissed, made out, fingered, sucked on titties, both have received and given oral sex, but the last time i experienced all of this was when i was 20.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Chamber36

Master Don Juan
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BatJuan said:
I think there's some notion that most virgins haven't had sex because they suck with women, or that they will eventually succumb to temptation. When I was 15 years old I posted something on a message board saying I'd wait until marriage, and this guy called me out saying that I should "wait until I grow up" and to get back to him in five years. In the subsequent five year period I had several girlfriends, including the obligatory extreme face-sucking make out sessions, and I even had one chick begging me to bang her while we were alone in this secluded park, but I stood my ground. Five years later I messaged the guy back, much to his surprise, and now at almost 24 years of age, I still haven't changed my views.

I just don't feel the need to be sexually active (despite the biological urges), so my activity is generally limited to kissing. I guess some of the heavy stuff could be considered feeling someone up, but I'm not one of those touchy-feely kind of guys.

In the past 7 years every single cell in your body has been replaced. You are literally not the same guy you were at 15.

I would not let a little 15 yr old boy dictate my actions.....
 

djokovic77

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I think if you're a virgin at over 21, you should just go up to girls/milfs/ skunks in bars and make a fool of yourself until you find one sl*t that will do it. It really makes a difference after it's over. You can sort of relax. There's a lot of power in it.
 

MM92

Senior Don Juan
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How on earth someone can be in their 20's and still a virgin i'll never know.
 

Eternal_water

Master Don Juan
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MM92 said:
How on earth someone can be in their 20's and still a virgin i'll never know.
If no girls are willing to have sex with you then you remain a virgin unless you take it by force, but that gets frowned upon.

Perhaps after graduation a celebratory trip to amsterdam :mad:
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

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don't

Don Juan
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wtf are you talking about? never heard of paying for it? I was a virgin until I was 26, wish I'd stayed that way for years longer, and put more money in the bank. If you let yourself, and let her, you can ruin your life by involvement with the wrong woman, the wrong time, the wrong approach to life.
 

MM92

Senior Don Juan
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Eternal_water said:
If no girls are willing to have sex with you then you remain a virgin unless you take it by force, but that gets frowned upon.

Perhaps after graduation a celebratory trip to amsterdam :mad:
But they are. If you're a virgin then in 95% of circumstances it has nothing to do with the way you look. It's your lack of "game" that is the reason and that can be sorted out. That's why you're here, right?
 

Eternal_water

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Yes but I don't see your point.

Looks wasn't what I was refering to. I actually like my looks. I look in the mirror and like what I see.

My lack of game is why I'm still a virgin, and my lack of game is very much a part of me. And its what I want to try and improve on.
 

Eternal_water

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Ihateinitiatingalot7 said:
seriously, how are some guys born with game meanwhile others have to struggle to gain it?
I guess its to do with nature, every species has strong and weak.

Also upbringing, if you were raised by a father with game or had an older brother with game you are bound to have picked something up.

My dad is 40 years older than me, stuck in the stone age and I have no brother and 1 sister, so I guess I got femminised a bit.

I need to build the I dont give a **** attitiude neded to approach
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Ihateinitiatingalot7

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Eternal_water said:
I guess its to do with nature, every species has strong and weak.

Also upbringing, if you were raised by a father with game or had an older brother with game you are bound to have picked something up.

My dad is 40 years older than me, stuck in the stone age and I have no brother and 1 sister, so I guess I got femminised a bit.

I need to build the I dont give a **** attitiude neded to approach
yeah it's like for so many guys, it's common sense for them, it's like "game" is instinctual for them, it's like they had "game" in them from day one, i'm not trying to compare myself to them because that is a waste of time, but it's like they were born knowing how to approach and talk to girls, women, but other guys were not. Also, my Dad told me that a lot of guys who grow up with an older sister or sister close to your age, it helps a lot, since i don't have any sisters, maybe that hurt me as well.
 

Eternal_water

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Ihateinitiatingalot7 said:
yeah it's like for so many guys, it's common sense for them, it's like "game" is instinctual for them, it's like they had "game" in them from day one, i'm not trying to compare myself to them because that is a waste of time, but it's like they were born knowing how to approach and talk to girls, women, but other guys were not. Also, my Dad told me that a lot of guys who grow up with an older sister or sister close to your age, it helps a lot, since i don't have any sisters, maybe that hurt me as well.
I think you misread some of my post.

I do have a sister, 1 sister 6 years older than me, which means I grew up listening to her and her friends talking about how they love nice sensitive guys and not being old enough to know better I took it all in.

Also meant years of my mum and sister playing chick flicks and observing how succesful the good guys are in the fictional storylines.

And I had no brother to do guy stuff with, hence growing up to be the nice guy. And now I know better and am working on deleting niceness from myself.
 

Eternal_water

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And If I'm still a virgin at 25 I'm going to amsterdam for a week and I'll be taking some bloody good condoms.
 

MM92

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Eternal_water said:
Yes but I don't see your point.

Looks wasn't what I was refering to. I actually like my looks. I look in the mirror and like what I see.

My lack of game is why I'm still a virgin, and my lack of game is very much a part of me. And its what I want to try and improve on.
...But they probably are willing to have sex with you, you're just too much of a faggot to make it happen.
 

Leporello

Master Don Juan
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DC
Something like 12% of men over the age of 25 are still virgins - that's 1 in 8. Not the norm but hardly uncommon.

I basically lost my V the first chance I got and I haven't regretted it.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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