Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
The money for it got wasted on the Cold War / Vietnam War / Korean War. So did the dreams of Gens X Y Z.cola said:What happend to the american dream?
Honestly, I don't know. Hell, I got one now claiming to be pregnant, but I don't trust her any farther than I can throw her.cola said:Did you have kids?
No.cola said:Were you married?
Yes.cola said:Are you really 50?
Yes, and I occasionally screw 'em too.cola said:Do you talk to women that are 50+?
No.cola said:Are you financially succesful?
I been wondering about it for decades.cola said:Just wondering
Feminism happened. The powers that be put women into the workforce by boggling their brains through T.V., magazines, etc. As women entered the workforce, men's jobs simply disappeared as women filled those slots. Therefore there was a massive trickle-down effect. Men who should be holding decent jobs are now working at 7-11 because they have been bumped down due to too many people in the workforce. But the powers are happy because now women are slaving away at the 9 to 5 just like men and paying taxes.cola said:What happend to the american dream?
Nope.cola said:Did you have kids?
No. I was engaged once but broke it off.cola said:Were you married?
55.cola said:Are you really 50?
Rarely. I'm so young for my age (both in looks and in demeanor) that women in their 50s seem ancient to me. Mid-30s to mid-40s is my comfort level.cola said:Do you talk to women that are 50+?
Yes. 2 businesses and a thriving music career.cola said:Are you financially succesful?
What makes you ask?cola said:Just wondering
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
The 30s is really the first decade of adulthood. For me, I still didn't have a clue about women. This didn't change until my late 40s. I would say that ideally your 30s could and should be your best years in regard to women, but it all depends on the individual. Looking ahead the 40s and 50s seems amazingly old, but looking back it's not that way at all. From this vantage point, it's not "Wow, I'm old and you're young". Rather, it's "We're all adults" and people in their 30s, 40s and 50s all seem about the same.SteR said:Since we're targeting the older gents here, I have a couple of questions:
Are your 30s really the best years of your life as a man? (in terms of attracting women)
Knowing what you know now, not just in regards to women, what key advice would you pass on to the younger generation? (and I mean 'key' since this is a rather open-ended question and I'm sure you could give a thousand answers)
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Its always pleasable to read this man, he point at whats bad without venting or any persecution attitude at the same time he makes clear whats good and what is useful to be done.Atom Smasher said:The 30s is really the first decade of adulthood. For me, I still didn't have a clue about women. This didn't change until my late 40s. I would say that ideally your 30s could and should be your best years in regard to women, but it all depends on the individual. Looking ahead the 40s and 50s seems amazingly old, but looking back it's not that way at all. From this vantage point, it's not "Wow, I'm old and you're young". Rather, it's "We're all adults" and people in their 30s, 40s and 50s all seem about the same.
So for me, my best years with women are my 50s. For you it might be 30s. Sexually, there is almost no difference between now and when I was in my twenties. When I was in my early twenties my 35 year old boss said that sexually he was just the same, and in my infinite wisdom I said to myself "Yeah, right". LOL, he was ancient to me.
I can happily report that even into your 50s you remain virtually the same sexually. I notice no diminishment at all, except perhaps that I have better self-control, that I don't need sex to validate my manhood.
Good times are ahead, young men! Back in the 1960s, 40 was considered OLD. Nowadays people stay younger much longer. If you guys could actually see me you would be shocked. You would be certain you were looking at a 35 year old.
For question #2:
Learn self-discipline. Undoing bad habits is massively, MASSIVELY difficult when you're older.
Value yourself above women. Realize that this is our world and that we need to reassert that. It is the natural order and our birthright. Every man should consider himself a King, taking care of his people, respecting and helping them but severely punishing outright disrespect.
Read between the lines.cola said:What happend to the american dream?
Money in the wars and it's a lot smaller than in the 80's.
Did you have kids?
Never have, probably never will.
Were you married?
Never, probably won't.
Are you really 50?
I'm really 50 divided by 2.![]()
Do you talk to women that are 50+?
Hell Yeah! I took a couple of women over 60 into chambers. I can't stand young women.
Are you financially succesful?
Not yet. Can't wait to get there. Much more prospects and time with the family.
Just wondering
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
to younger guys, get your sh1t together asap, health, keep your weight down, work out, dont overdo the partying and do not let a woman be only source of your happiness, you will end up more miserable 99% of the timecola said:What happend to the american dream?
Im not American but 'the dream' was an aspiration, a glorious one but feminism put the bot into that, now its a nightmare.
Did you have kids?
4
Were you married?
yes, 21 years, a reasoanbly good marriage for the most part but had this site been around 30 years or so ago, it wouldnt have happened and wont again of that I am pretty certain.
Are you really 50?
very nearly
Do you talk to women that are 50+?
yes, but they are a strange bunch, they want to be married and settled down more desperately than a 25 year old wants a child. its not going to happen with me, I dont know about other guys but the 'wall' although being hit by many women at 40, really becomes a physical trainwreck at 50 for women, the good looking women at 50 + are very few and far between.
Are you financially succesful?
not really but Im independant, good career and a decent wage
Just wondering
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
zekko said:
Knowing what you know now, not just in regards to women, what key advice would you pass on to the younger generation?
Get your house in order, especially financially. Do what you have to do to maximize your income, whether it be education, extra hours working on your business, whatever. Live simply within your means, save for the future, study about retirement, invest in retirement. It comes around more quickly than you might think, and I would take the attitude that you'll have to pay your own way. The quicker you start and the harder you hit it, the better off you'll be. I don't plan on working my whole life.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.