"The Kiss of Death Mistake"
You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?
Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.
One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.
Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.
tips on hiding emotions?
- Thread starter wildchild
- Start date
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
OrlandoDaHash
Don Juan
You don’t have to go nuts with rage when you’re angry, nor do you have to cry like a baby when you're sad, but it is important to show respect to your feelings and let them be. They are here to help you. If you don’t they will come back to hunt you in forms such as anxiety, depression, suicidal ideas, etc.
Anaxibios
Don Juan
I've been trying to have a what the hell attitude, and it makes me less susceptable to these emotions.
In my opinion it is the internal dialogue that is most effective in combating these feelings. Just keep telling yourself that you're the "catch" and she is being stupid
."She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
-HPNOTIQ-
Master Don Juan
To explain:
Its like going to Vegas, winning $1000 on a slot machine. CHA-CHING! Instant happiness.
Now..let's say you felt lucky and decided to go to the crap tables now. Unfortunately, the house cleaned you out and left you only $50 of that $1000.
Now let's look at the 'point of view' from this situation.
You can either be pissed off and emotionally feel like a loser. Or, you can have an attitude of a winner. Hey..you're up $50!!!
Using quotes from the movie "Swingers" starts to get a bit trite around this board. Remember that scene when the fellas were in Vegas...you need to ACCENTUATE the positives in your life.
Change your point of view. You've got good health, money enough to own a computer and internet access, and the motivation to be on this site and learn about being a man, and not just chasing women.
Once your point of view is changed, hit the gym and release some good ole fashioned endorphins to get on that natural high...the great side effect to the gym is a body you can be proud of. Now how can that depress a fella?
OrlandoDaHash
Don Juan
Anger is the best emotion in this case. It gives you strength to handle rejections or mind games. But it's very important to know how to handle this emotion. Get angry, feel the anger with every cell in your body, feel the power it gives you and then assert yourself with firm and self-confident attitude. But don't blow up in rage, because that’s not the way this works. Stay in control.
I disagree. The mind can influence emotions as much as emotions can influence the mind, but they are two different autonomous parts of the Self.
To explain:
If I’m married to a woman I hate, work at a job that I despise and live in a polluted and dull small town I will feel depressed. Sure, I can change my point of view and start to appreciate everything I have, but that’s not the answer. I may feel better for a couple of weeks or even months, but the original feelings of depression will return because I have done nothing more but masked my true feelings. It would be better to acknowledge my life sucks and do something about it.
It can if he has to go back home to the wife he hates.
Mr. Delicious
Senior Don Juan
So what i am saying is you should be glad you are able to show emotions well its healthy just dont overdo it -HPNOTIQ-
Master Don Juan
I'm an optimist...my parents had very little..and I put myself through college, 2 degrees, and have little worry because things ARE ALWAYS WORSE.
to take your quotes:
I could be married to a woman I hate - I can be a pessimist about having a bad marriage...or I can be optimistic about change.
I could live in a polluted small town - I can be a pessimist about it...or have the optimism to change.
I NEVER said to mask your feelings or emotions. But, to have a negative attitude like yours isn't healthy. I'd like to crack my old college psych books and return with a synopsis of how depression and negativity sets in.
But why acknowlegde that life sucks?! Why acknowledge that you are a loser?! - Will this promote a healthy change?
hahaha..its funny to ever say that one's life sucks..there are people in this world with HIV, comatose, or stuck in wheel chairs and these people still go out and try to change the world.
Fellas...NEVER EVER acknowledge that your life sucks. ALWAYS accentuate the positives. If there are negatives in your life...understand them, then change them.
CHANGE YOUR POINT OF VIEW...CHANGE YOUR POINT OF LIVING.
READ MY QUOTE
OrlandoDaHash
Don Juan
On the other hand, there are things in life that cannot be changed or be influenced upon. Here’s where your examples of HIV, comatose or wheel chairs would come in. A healthy response in this case is the will to acknowledge the unchangeable and accept it as it is.
But on the overall, I think we agree. Accentuate the positives and (if possible) change the negatives.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
-HPNOTIQ-
Master Don Juan
werd up homie
Julius_Caesar
Don Juan
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Never resist, accept, then act. That is the way to freedom. Because then you see that you DON'T HAVE TO BE EMOTIONAL AT ALL. Emotions are there, but they don't need to be.
Read the Power of Now, that sh*t works.