my gf and i have been together for about 6-7 months, the relationship is decent, and so on. my dilemma is this; she has been acting weird lately(past week), if i had to explain it i would say that she is trying to act like she doesn't care, saying she'll call when she doesn't(never used to do this), very minimal details about everything, we only hang out once in a while, etc. the list goes on, now as i typed that it sounded like someone that is cheating, but i really don't think she is, however i could be wrong. what could i do to get a better understanding of what she is doing, thinking, etc? also what could i do to throw her a curve, she didn't call one day until later around 9:30 and asked me why i never called all day, i said i was busy, things similar to this?
Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single
She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.
You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.
The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.
throw my gf a curve
- Thread starter swaptrex
- Start date
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Hitman10000
Master Don Juan
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The next time you see her in person, have a talk about this.
Last Man Standing
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Do some reconnaissance!!
DoubleC
Don Juan
She's probably hiding SOMETHING, even if it's not cheating. Like hitman said, confront her about it face to face.
socalrunner
Don Juan
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truthDoubleC said:
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Last Man Standing
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If you want the truth then DON'T confront her!!! Do reconnaissance!!!
passionman
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im starting to see that there are actual dj's on here.
MacDiddy
Master Don Juan
Why even bother with recon... She's cheating and you don't need to know the cold truth.... just make plans to move on and you will have very little emotional trauma.... She deserves better and you better not get in her way.
But mark my words... if you don't move on and if you must know the truth... prepare for a roller coaster ride.
But mark my words... if you don't move on and if you must know the truth... prepare for a roller coaster ride.
frivolousz21
Master Don Juan
its a hard position to be in...you should start getting your mind set on things not working.
I can tell you when you are in a relationship for that long this wouldnt happen if things were right.
you should start planning on a future without her....and see if you can find out whats going and fix it..if you cant..understand that its ok...and there are MILLIONS of women out there
I can tell you when you are in a relationship for that long this wouldnt happen if things were right.
you should start planning on a future without her....and see if you can find out whats going and fix it..if you cant..understand that its ok...and there are MILLIONS of women out there
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
ya thanks for the tips so far, i am pretty good at telling if someone is cheating because unfortunately i used to it also, and i will say if she is cheating she has me fooled.
shes like this one or two days, and then fine for a few days, and so on. should i give her less attention? will this get her attention? if not what will?
shes like this one or two days, and then fine for a few days, and so on. should i give her less attention? will this get her attention? if not what will?
Man, it could be anything. All relationships are going to have their dull moments, and it's just inevitable. If you're young (under 25) don't invest too much time doing reconnaissance work. If you know what to expect if she's cheating, then you will know.
Talk to her briefly and just let her know that if she needs to talk about something or needs help that you will be there. Then leave it alone.
You would have accomplished a few things:
1. Since you claim you can spot a cheater just look for things that would tip you off. You are already experienced enough to determine if she's stepping out on you. If that's the case move on.
2. If she isn't cheating she can count on you, without you constantly nagging her. You don't want to appear needy.
3. By the way enjoy life. Continue enjoying yourself and friends, because she may not be the one, and you might want to find other "girlfriends".
Talk to her briefly and just let her know that if she needs to talk about something or needs help that you will be there. Then leave it alone.
You would have accomplished a few things:
1. Since you claim you can spot a cheater just look for things that would tip you off. You are already experienced enough to determine if she's stepping out on you. If that's the case move on.
2. If she isn't cheating she can count on you, without you constantly nagging her. You don't want to appear needy.
3. By the way enjoy life. Continue enjoying yourself and friends, because she may not be the one, and you might want to find other "girlfriends".
frivolousz21
Master Don Juan
If you live in Toronto or NYCmrRuckus said:
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
justsomeguy1984
Don Juan
As others have said, do NOT confront her. Confronting any woman about a relationship problem will just make things worse.
I don't think she is necessarily cheating on you (although it is possible), but it sounds to me like she is maybe getting a little bored with the relationship. Try to be spontaneous and do some new things.
I don't think she is necessarily cheating on you (although it is possible), but it sounds to me like she is maybe getting a little bored with the relationship. Try to be spontaneous and do some new things.
In2theGame
Master Don Juan
Forget curve ball. Throw her a F---King Screwball followed by a Bean ball. If shes treating you like garbage, Then its time to tell her to take a flying leap and go get yourself two cuties sitting on your lap while sipping in a barcardi O.swaptrex said:
ya i am not going to stress about it to much due to the fact i am enrolled in a college in the top party schools for fall 07, however i do like her and wished we could just have fun without her being a *****. sometimes i think about breaking up with her, but then she starts in with the "i love you so much" and the crying. i guess i will just have to work on things and hope for the best possible outcome.