my gf and i have been together for about 6-7 months, the relationship is decent, and so on. my dilemma is this; she has been acting weird lately(past week), if i had to explain it i would say that she is trying to act like she doesn't care, saying she'll call when she doesn't(never used to do this), very minimal details about everything, we only hang out once in a while, etc. the list goes on, now as i typed that it sounded like someone that is cheating, but i really don't think she is, however i could be wrong. what could i do to get a better understanding of what she is doing, thinking, etc? also what could i do to throw her a curve, she didn't call one day until later around 9:30 and asked me why i never called all day, i said i was busy, things similar to this?
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
throw my gf a curve
- Thread starter swaptrex
- Start date
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Hitman10000
Master Don Juan
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The next time you see her in person, have a talk about this.
Last Man Standing
Banned
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Do some reconnaissance!!
DoubleC
Don Juan
She's probably hiding SOMETHING, even if it's not cheating. Like hitman said, confront her about it face to face.
socalrunner
Don Juan
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truthDoubleC said:
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Last Man Standing
Banned
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- 3,956
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If you want the truth then DON'T confront her!!! Do reconnaissance!!!
passionman
Don Juan
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im starting to see that there are actual dj's on here.
MacDiddy
Master Don Juan
Why even bother with recon... She's cheating and you don't need to know the cold truth.... just make plans to move on and you will have very little emotional trauma.... She deserves better and you better not get in her way.
But mark my words... if you don't move on and if you must know the truth... prepare for a roller coaster ride.
But mark my words... if you don't move on and if you must know the truth... prepare for a roller coaster ride.
frivolousz21
Master Don Juan
its a hard position to be in...you should start getting your mind set on things not working.
I can tell you when you are in a relationship for that long this wouldnt happen if things were right.
you should start planning on a future without her....and see if you can find out whats going and fix it..if you cant..understand that its ok...and there are MILLIONS of women out there
I can tell you when you are in a relationship for that long this wouldnt happen if things were right.
you should start planning on a future without her....and see if you can find out whats going and fix it..if you cant..understand that its ok...and there are MILLIONS of women out there
“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”
Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.
I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.
Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules. Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.
ya thanks for the tips so far, i am pretty good at telling if someone is cheating because unfortunately i used to it also, and i will say if she is cheating she has me fooled.
shes like this one or two days, and then fine for a few days, and so on. should i give her less attention? will this get her attention? if not what will?
shes like this one or two days, and then fine for a few days, and so on. should i give her less attention? will this get her attention? if not what will?
Man, it could be anything. All relationships are going to have their dull moments, and it's just inevitable. If you're young (under 25) don't invest too much time doing reconnaissance work. If you know what to expect if she's cheating, then you will know.
Talk to her briefly and just let her know that if she needs to talk about something or needs help that you will be there. Then leave it alone.
You would have accomplished a few things:
1. Since you claim you can spot a cheater just look for things that would tip you off. You are already experienced enough to determine if she's stepping out on you. If that's the case move on.
2. If she isn't cheating she can count on you, without you constantly nagging her. You don't want to appear needy.
3. By the way enjoy life. Continue enjoying yourself and friends, because she may not be the one, and you might want to find other "girlfriends".
Talk to her briefly and just let her know that if she needs to talk about something or needs help that you will be there. Then leave it alone.
You would have accomplished a few things:
1. Since you claim you can spot a cheater just look for things that would tip you off. You are already experienced enough to determine if she's stepping out on you. If that's the case move on.
2. If she isn't cheating she can count on you, without you constantly nagging her. You don't want to appear needy.
3. By the way enjoy life. Continue enjoying yourself and friends, because she may not be the one, and you might want to find other "girlfriends".
frivolousz21
Master Don Juan
If you live in Toronto or NYCmrRuckus said:
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
justsomeguy1984
Don Juan
As others have said, do NOT confront her. Confronting any woman about a relationship problem will just make things worse.
I don't think she is necessarily cheating on you (although it is possible), but it sounds to me like she is maybe getting a little bored with the relationship. Try to be spontaneous and do some new things.
I don't think she is necessarily cheating on you (although it is possible), but it sounds to me like she is maybe getting a little bored with the relationship. Try to be spontaneous and do some new things.
In2theGame
Master Don Juan
Forget curve ball. Throw her a F---King Screwball followed by a Bean ball. If shes treating you like garbage, Then its time to tell her to take a flying leap and go get yourself two cuties sitting on your lap while sipping in a barcardi O.swaptrex said:
ya i am not going to stress about it to much due to the fact i am enrolled in a college in the top party schools for fall 07, however i do like her and wished we could just have fun without her being a *****. sometimes i think about breaking up with her, but then she starts in with the "i love you so much" and the crying. i guess i will just have to work on things and hope for the best possible outcome.