Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Agree with EyeBRollin. Polite and to the point.Hi Brad How are you? On Monday I have plans but on Wednesday in free. I have to make sure you know I have a partner so if you're keen for a friendly drink, I can meet you there?
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
Fvck that. If he wants to get it, then try and get it. It could just be a sh!t test to see if he is going to go for it anyway...if it is, that's the exact opposite of what will actually work...she wants him to show some aggressiveness and dominance not passiveness.Agree with EyeBRollin. Polite and to the point.
I suppose, but if a girl is telling him she is sleeping with a 6'1 basketball player and they will just be friends if they meet for drinks, I think that means she wants to see how desperate he is. And if she testing him before they even meet face to face, what's she going to do when he wants to make a move?Fvck that. If he wants to get it, then try and get it. It could just be a sh!t test to see if he is going to go for it anyway...if it is, that's the exact opposite of what will actually work...she wants him to show some aggressiveness and dominance not passiveness.
What she wants is irrelevant to this situation. What the OP wants is all that is important.I suppose, but if a girl is telling him she is sleeping with a 6'1 basketball player and they will just be friends if they meet for drinks, I think that means she wants to see how desperate he is. And if she testing him before they even meet face to face, what's she going to do when he wants to make a move?
Also, if what she said could be a test, then almost everything out of a girls mouth could be a test. If she said "Let's meet at my apartment and go straight to sex." It could be a test to see how lonely he is and how long he hasn't had sex.
We can't consider everything a test, would make for a long week.
Sounds like another low quality woman looking to upgrade behind her bf back. If she is making plans with you and admitting she already has a boyfriend then this is a low quality woman. I'd say "thanks but Wednesday doesn't work for me. Take care." No counter offer from me then next her.Hi Brad How are you? On Monday I have plans but on Wednesday in free. I have to make sure you know I have a partner so if you're keen for a friendly drink, I can meet you there?
OP is trying to get laid, not fall in love. What's the problem?Sounds like another low quality woman looking to upgrade behind her bf back. If she is making plans with you and admitting she already has a boyfriend then this is a low quality woman. I'd say "thanks but Wednesday doesn't work for me. Take care." No counter offer from me then next her.
Remember guys if she will cheat with you she will cheat on you.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
I guess I still live up to the old man code. Where if a women is taken, even if she wants it out of respect for my fellow man i don't go there. I was taught that being and respecting one an other, that was integrity. It also taught the women in our generation to not play those games because no guy would put up with it. I'm guessing that old man code doesn't exist anymore?OP is trying to get laid, not fall in love. What's the problem?
I guess i am old fashioned. What would your take be if you came home and your lady was ankles high getting it from some strange guy?I personally could care less if they have a BF, husband, sex partner. As long as I want them, nothing else really matters to me.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
"Don't expect you to be. I'm just upfront, so if my confidence or directness intimidates you or is more than you can handle, I know before I waste my time. Now that you know the rules of the game, are you going to play, or do you want to take your ball and go home?"Your 'seduce you' text message is now my headline on POF.
I just got a message.... "what makes you think I'm that easy?"
Golden.
Too overconfident. Maybe that works, but I would've toned it down a bit. It might sound funny in text between us, but unless her interest is sky high, it'd fall flat. id go with what @bigneil said. Very direct to cut the bs, but still is playful and sternI used Awesome! I hope he isn't going to be jealous when I seduce you Wednesday night.. no answer back hahaha lol see what happens
It all depends on how she knows him to be. It works well if it fits with how you typically act. I've used it several timesToo overconfident. Maybe that works, but I would've toned it down a bit. It might sound funny in text between us, but unless her interest is sky high, it'd fall flat. id go with what @bigneil said. Very direct to cut the bs, but still is playful and stern
In all actuality, if you care about what to text back to her, you're trying too hard already.
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.