Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

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Bokanovsky

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I know it's hard to believe there are good women, but that belief is the first step to actually finding them.
Oh that is most certainly true. I’m a bit perplexed as to how you managed to conclude that she’s one of them though. Your conclusion is based on what? Stuff she writes about herself on this forum???
 
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EyeOnThePrize

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Oh that is most certainly true. I’m a bit perplexed as to how you managed to conclude that she’s one of them though. Your conclusion is based on what? Stuff she writes about herself on this forum???
The way she writes, her vocab, the thoughtfulness and length of her posts, the fact that she doesn't name call or psycho diagnose other members, doesn't try to dress them down, doesn't get upset when on the receiving end of criticism (this thread being a good example). Comparing someone's issues to your own is a way to relate to them and show empathy, 'I once had a similar issue, this was it, these are the actions I took, this is what I recommend you do'. Her posts are loaded with nuggets of wisdom, you kiddin? To me, her responses have always seemed genuine and on topic to the threads she posts in. BE has also openly picked the brain of members here I hold in high regard, and they responded after seriously contemplating what she brought up, showing her the same respect and attention. Years ago I even PM'd her with my own issues, and she provided valuable advice.

Like I said in my last post, if she bothers you but you have nothing specific to point at as evidence of your claims, then the problem is on your end. Without that proof it's just you being emotional. You may feel jealousy or envy of her success, which is again a sign of feeling threatened, but I feel nothing of the sort. If anything I feel inspired and a sense of camaraderie, and I attribute this feeling to being proud of my own success. I can relate to her pride because coming up is fvcking HARD. And I think she only flexed in this thread because you came at her.

Why would reading positive things about someone's life upset you? The only thing I can think of is it's due to an insecurity.

It's also worth pointing out that divulging personal information, especially missteps, is a very vulnerable thing to do. To put those things out in the open and then not get upset when people try to use it against you, is again very admirable.

When a person is successful, calm, and patient, there will always be others that attempt to exploit that patience. These other people will be more emotional and audacious than they are normally, because they recognize that the person on the receiving end has the capacity to tolerate it. To me, and to anyone aware enough, that kind of behavior is a cry for help. We're obviously willing to talk about what bothers you, but you're wasting your time if you think you'll be able to get under that person's skin for a small ego boost. If fact you're working against yourself by cutting off valuable resources.

Rather than succumbing to emotions and being reactive, let your thoughts lead the way and focus on being proactive. Anticipate anger and release it before it becomes uncontrollable. Your thoughts dictate your emotions, not the other way around. There is value in every interaction, seek it out.

I'm willing to bet that what she says about her life is true. She's even invited you to visit despite your attempts to demean her. If I recall correctly certain members have met her in person and verified that she's legit.
 

Bokanovsky

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The way she writes, her vocab, the thoughtfulness and length of her posts, the fact that she doesn't name call or psycho diagnose other members, doesn't try to dress them down, doesn't get upset when on the receiving end of criticism (this thread being a good example). Comparing someone's issues to your own is a way to relate to them and show empathy, 'I once had a similar issue, this was it, these are the actions I took, this is what I recommend you do'. Her posts are loaded with nuggets of wisdom, you kiddin? To me, her responses have always seemed genuine and on topic to the threads she posts in. BE has also openly picked the brain of members here I hold in high regard, and they responded after seriously contemplating what she brought up, showing her the same respect and attention. Years ago I even PM'd her with my own issues, and she provided valuable advice.

Like I said in my last post, if she bothers you but you have nothing specific to point at as evidence of your claims, then the problem is on your end. Without that proof it's just you being emotional. You may feel jealousy or envy of her success, which is again a sign of feeling threatened, but I feel nothing of the sort. If anything I feel inspired and a sense of camaraderie, and I attribute this feeling to being proud of my own success. I can relate to her pride because coming up is fvcking HARD. And I think she only flexed in this thread because you came at her.
Envy her success? Feel threatened?? WTF are you talking about??? She's a 52 year old divorced single mom. Is that what passes for success these days? LOL. People who are actually successful don't brag about their success to random strangers on the internet. No normal woman would join SS and write thousands of posts about her life. Can you see yourself joining some relationship forum for women and writing thousands of posts, over the course of several years, about your success with women? If the answer is yes, you have a personality disorder too.
I'm willing to bet that what she says about her life is true. She's even invited you to visit despite your attempts to demean her. If I recall correctly certain members have met her in person and verified that she's legit.
You think it was a genuine offer? She is going to invite a complete stranger she knowns nothing about to go meet her family, her kids, her parents, her BF, her exes? :D You, my friend, must be a very gifted individual.

Look, I don't want to argue with you further as there is simply no point in doing so. You are clearly enamoured with BE for some reason and nothing will change your mind. That's fine. She uses this forum for attention and validation and guys like you provide it in spades. Carry on.
 

Guy69JackBlue

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Oh that is most certainly true. I’m a bit perplexed as to how you managed to conclude that she’s one of them though. Your conclusion is based on what? Stuff she writes about herself on this forum???
She describes herself as a "perfect ten" and anyone who doesn't agree is just probably a loser who's just jealous. How much of that nonsense can people tolerate?
 

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Guy69JackBlue

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I'm sensing anger or frustration, which is a reaction to a threat. What do you feel threatened by? What has BE specifically said (perhaps in the context of this thread) that has you so worked up?

If I don't find her insulting or pretentious and can draw value from her posts, wouldn't that mean I'm in a more flexible and advantageous headspace than you?

If a man is fulfilled in life working on his passions, he's generally happier, less sensitive, and harder to upset.
If a man is stagnating, receding, or is otherwise frustrated with life, he's generally easier to upset and more sensitive.

I know it may be hard to hear, but it's more likely that you're unhappy in other aspects of your life and are perhaps more sensitive to opinions that don't immediately line up with yours or support your current lifestyle. Otherwise we would be able to at least write up a decent case against any perceived slights and reach a consensus about exactly what BE said that is mean, pretentious, etc.

In this thread BE has written about her life success and accomplishments to clear any misunderstandings when accused of being broken, and seems proud of her family. Personally I see nothing wrong with that. She hasn't let anything said here upset her as far as I can tell, which is again admirable. Does her success feel like a threat? I'm trying to pin down something that could be perceived as pretentious or insulting. Personally I say good for her, the SS community benefits from people that are living healthy fulfilling lives.

It's not BE that upsets you, or anything else in the world, it's your interpretation. If your conclusions weren't subject to your perspective, then you and I would have the same complaints, or you could easily show me what exactly was said that's insulting. Because I haven't been shown anything of substance to back up these claims and because we can have differing perspectives regarding the same event/thing, the onus is on you to show emotional responsibility, and not let yourself get upset by something out of your control.
I don't need to hear anything specific in one thread or another. It's her extremely narcissistic and elitist way of thinking, that is backed up by absolutely nothing. She will hide the negative aspects of herself and preach some delusional fantasy on here as if it's reality. She has not had successful relationships in her own life, yet somehow she finds herself qualified to preach to males what to do? It is utterly ridiculous.
 

EyeOnThePrize

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Envy her success? Feel threatened?? WTF are you talking about??? She's a 52 year old divorced single mom. Is that what passes for success these days? LOL. People who are actually successful don't brag about their success to random strangers on the internet. No normal woman would join SS and write thousands of posts about her life. Can you see yourself joining some relationship forum for women and writing thousands of posts, over the course of several years, about your success with women? If the answer is yes, you have a personality disorder too.
Once again, you're focusing on the person's character, not the content they put out. And I've asked you to describe what passes as a successful person for you. I've also mentioned that 'perfect' couples, 'perfect' people, that have no relationship issues, would find this place a complete bore. Who are you expecting to be posting here?

I assume it's envy because I've asked you WHY she bothers you, to point to specifics, and you haven't. That leads me to belief that you're salty for personal reasons, out of insecurity. You would have quoted her by now otherwise.

You're right, the average woman probably wouldn't be able to post on SS without getting pissed off or turned off by men here. Yet we have a woman that seems intelligent, articulate, helpful, and able to tolerate the autism of some members on this forum. I get the feeling she's the last one! We used to have a few women posting. What sense is there in dismissing her perspective?

Don't we all have flaws here? Isn't that why we come here? To share our wisdom and contemplate how to improve our lives? To say 'she has issues', 'you have issues', to put others down because they don't have what YOU think would be a perfect life, speaks volumes about your intent and mindset here.

You think it was a genuine offer? She is going to invite a complete stranger she knowns nothing about to go meet her family, her kids, her parents, her BF, her exes? :D You, my friend, must be a very gifted individual.
She probably wouldn't let you get that far, but perhaps meet you for coffee with some of her guy friends or whatever. The extreme you describe is a weak argument.

Look, I don't want to argue with you further as there is simply no point in doing so. You are clearly enamoured with BE for some reason and nothing will change your mind. That's fine. She uses this forum for attention and validation and guys like you provide it in spades. Carry on.
I've given you simple questions to answer because if she's being abrasive or unreasonable I want to know about it. I want to know if I should be wary. Again, because you can't seem to come up with anything other than that she's divorced, I'm skeptical of your claims. You called her out, and she expanded on what you said to provide more context. It came off as a flex because she's done well, and you're offended even by that.

Everyone here posts for validation and attention. You don't post things on a forum so no one can read them.

'Guys like me' seek out and cultivate high value, regardless of the sex or circumstance of the individuals involved. I've asked you reasonable rational questions to root out the problem you seem to have with her, to no avail. I agree, this is a bit of a fruitless exchange because you don't seem to think there's anything wrong with having so much contempt for another person.

I'm open to having my mind changed, your arguments are just weak or nonexistent, no offense.
 

Bokanovsky

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I'm open to having my mind changed, your arguments are just weak or nonexistent, no offense.
None taken. You can only be offended by someone you care about. Obviously, I don't care about random people on the internet.

Like I said, I am not going to try to change your mind as that would likely be a futile exercise. When a man develops oneitis (even if it's for an artificial internet persona), he becomes blind to obvious facts. I have written in other posts why I have a problem with what BE is trying to do to SS. The coles notes version is that she is trying to hijack an excellent and unique discussion forum for men with her narcissistic BS. If you want the long version, you will have to search my post history.
 

EyeOnThePrize

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She describes herself as a "perfect ten" and anyone who doesn't agree is just probably a loser who's just jealous. How much of that nonsense can people tolerate?
I don't care if she's a 10? I judge people based on the content they put forth. That's why I've asked you to point to the content that has you feeling like this, which you can't seem to do.


I don't need to hear anything specific in one thread or another. It's her extremely narcissistic and elitist way of thinking, that is backed up by absolutely nothing. She will hide the negative aspects of herself and preach some delusional fantasy on here as if it's reality. She has not had successful relationships in her own life, yet somehow she finds herself qualified to preach to males what to do? It is utterly ridiculous.
Yes you do need to provide specifics, otherwise you're just brooding and raising your blood pressure for no reason, being emotional and irrational. Show me something rational and concrete to back up these labels.

If she hides the negative aspects of herself then how did @Bokanovsky know about her situation? Obviously because she divulged the info in other threads. So where is the hiding?

I've asked you to define 'successful relationship', since it's subjective. Do you mean a relationship that never ends? I've had relationships where we loved each other greatly and simply grew apart. To me, a relationship ending is not a negative thing.

You seem to think she's preaching, I think she's throwing her 2 cents in like everyone else. At this point I think you're jaded against women or something. If the information was provided in a form that didn't divulge her sex, you probably wouldn't feel this way towards them.

If she was harming the community she would have been banned long ago. She hasn't been, and I'm stepping forward to provide you more context about her, and that I believe she's genuinely a good person trying to help. I'm also here to remind us all that being upset easily can be a symptom of deeper personal issues.

None taken. You can only be offended by someone you care about. Obviously, I don't care about random people on the internet.

Look, like I said, I am not going to try to change your mind as that would likely be a futile exercise. When a man develops oneitis (even if it's for an artificial internet persona), he becomes blind to obvious facts. I have written in other posts why I have a problem with what BE is trying to do to SS. The coles notes version is that she is trying to hijack an excellent and unique discussion forum for men with her narcissistic BS. If you want the long version, you will have to search my post history.
Oh interesting you've written at length about this. Maybe if I have the time and inclination later I'll track that thread down and educate myself.

Claiming I have itis for BE is again a reduction to absurdity in an attempt to bolster your argument, for which you haven't provided anything solid (although perhaps I'll find something in your mentioned thread). Itis for any woman is a quick way to blow your life up and destroy yourself and those around you. Itis usually involves lots of emotions too, while I feel perfectly calm.

The 'facts' I'm blind to need to be outlined, otherwise we can't entertain this campaign of yours. If you find your thread before I do, link it up.
 
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Guy69JackBlue

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I don't care if she's a 10? I judge people based on the content they put forth. That's why I've asked you to point to the content that has you feeling like this, which you can't seem to do.



Yes you do need to provide specifics, otherwise you're just brooding and raising your blood pressure for no reason, being emotional and irrational. Show me something rational and concrete to back up these labels.

If she hides the negative aspects of herself then how did @Bokanovsky know about her situation? Obviously because she divulged the info in other threads. So where is the hiding?

I've asked you to define 'successful relationship', since it's subjective. Do you mean a relationship that never ends? I've had relationships where we loved each other greatly and simply grew apart. To me, a relationship ending is not a negative thing.

You seem to think she's preaching, I think she's throwing her 2 cents in like everyone else. At this point I think you're jaded against women or something. If the information was provided in a form that didn't divulge her sex, you probably wouldn't feel this way towards them.

If she was harming the community she would have been banned long ago. She hasn't been, and I'm stepping forward to provide you more context about her, and that I believe she's genuinely a good person trying to help. I'm also here to remind us all that being upset easily can be a symptom of deeper personal issues.



Oh interesting you've written at length about this. Maybe if I have the time and inclination later I'll track that thread down and educate myself.

Claiming I have itis for BE is again a reduction to absurdity in an attempt to bolster your argument, for which you haven't provided anything solid (although perhaps I'll find something in your mentioned thread). Itis for any woman is a quick way to blow your life up and destroy yourself and those around you. Itis usually involves lots of emotions too, while I feel perfectly calm.

The 'facts' I'm blind to need to be outlined, otherwise we can't entertain this campaign of yours. If you find your thread before I do, link it up.
Stop trying to be Sigmund Freud.

Specific things? How about her responding to the post saying that she thinks she's in an elite class. But I honestly don't care anything about her until she starts talking her garbage.

I can't say what I really think of you for fear of being blocked.

Now we've reached the logical fallacy that all of her nonsense always leads to... You either agree that her sh1t doesn't stink, or you're just a loser. BS.
 

Guy69JackBlue

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I don't care if she's a 10? I judge people based on the content they put forth. That's why I've asked you to point to the content that has you feeling like this, which you can't seem to do.



Yes you do need to provide specifics, otherwise you're just brooding and raising your blood pressure for no reason, being emotional and irrational. Show me something rational and concrete to back up these labels.

If she hides the negative aspects of herself then how did @Bokanovsky know about her situation? Obviously because she divulged the info in other threads. So where is the hiding?

I've asked you to define 'successful relationship', since it's subjective. Do you mean a relationship that never ends? I've had relationships where we loved each other greatly and simply grew apart. To me, a relationship ending is not a negative thing.

You seem to think she's preaching, I think she's throwing her 2 cents in like everyone else. At this point I think you're jaded against women or something. If the information was provided in a form that didn't divulge her sex, you probably wouldn't feel this way towards them.

If she was harming the community she would have been banned long ago. She hasn't been, and I'm stepping forward to provide you more context about her, and that I believe she's genuinely a good person trying to help. I'm also here to remind us all that being upset easily can be a symptom of deeper personal issues.



Oh interesting you've written at length about this. Maybe if I have the time and inclination later I'll track that thread down and educate myself.

Claiming I have itis for BE is again a reduction to absurdity in an attempt to bolster your argument, for which you haven't provided anything solid (although perhaps I'll find something in your mentioned thread). Itis for any woman is a quick way to blow your life up and destroy yourself and those around you. Itis usually involves lots of emotions too, while I feel perfectly calm.

The 'facts' I'm blind to need to be outlined, otherwise we can't entertain this campaign of yours. If you find your thread before I do, link it up.
Is it also possible that you have a tendency to be a white knight or a simp? Not saying you are... Just wondering though.
 

EyeOnThePrize

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Stop trying to be Sigmund Freud.

Specific things? How about her responding to the post saying that she thinks she's in an elite class. But I honestly don't care anything about her until she starts talking her garbage.

I can't say what I really think of you for fear of being blocked.

Now we've reached the logical fallacy that all of her nonsense always leads to... You either agree that her sh1t doesn't stink, or you're just a loser. BS.
I'm not trying to be anything, this is who I am.

You're free to PM me whatever you think about me, you have my word and this post as proof that you won't be banned. Sounds like you're just mad and want to call me names or something, otherwise you'd just post it here. It's cool, I'm a grown as$ man, down to hash things out.

She was directly asked if she believes she's in the top 10% of women, she didn't just come out of the blue saying she's elite. Although now that I think about it I think she hasmentioned And @Bokanovsky had a good point that women can delude themselves into thinking they're in this bracket when they're not. In her case I believe she's actually in it. I think being rich is enough to be in that bracket for most men. Over time sure, all of us will have less to offer our potential partners, but that money attracts for a lifetime haha.

We don't have to agree on whether she's in the top 10%, I'm looking more at why that matters so much to you guys. For some reason you don't want to believe she's in that bracket. I have no idea why, but what difference does it make? That doesn't make her advice any less valid. Anyway PM me, I'll make this my last post here.
 
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Guy69JackBlue

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I'm not trying to be anything, this is who I am.

You're free to PM me whatever you think about me, you have my word and this post as proof that you won't be banned. Again sounds like you're just mad and want to call me names or something, otherwise you'd just post it here.

She was directly asked if she believes she's in the top 10% of women, she didn't just come out of the blue saying she's elite. Although now that I think about it I think she hasmentioned And @Bokanovsky had a good point that women can delude themselves into thinking they're in this bracket when they're not. In her case I believe she's actually in it. I think being rich is enough to be in that bracket for most men. Over time sure, all of us will have less to offer our potential partners, but that money attracts for a lifetime haha.

We don't have to agree on whether she's in the top 10%, I'm looking more at why that matters so much to you guys. For some reason you don't want to believe she's in that bracket. I have no idea why, but what difference does it make? That doesn't make her advice any less valid. Anyway PM me, I'll make this my last post here.
I'm not PMing you.

She's not in top 10% because of lack of looks actually. But I'm not even getting to the point of judging her on that because her personality is too bad to even want to. Her personality is also bottom 10%.

And the reason why it's worth the time to say this is because of how she talks on here like she's some hot sh1t. So it's human nature to want to put her in her place and not just act passive and feminine and put her on ignore. I have more money than she does, but I don't care about that either. And I only ever mention that on here in defense (such as recently when someone said that perhaps I had negativity affecting my personal success).

Life isn't as easy as just "be positive."
 

joesbigship

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I did not say happy relationships did not exist in this world. Please show me where I said this.

I did say that many attractive girls do not feel worthy of love. So they will sabatoge any attempts at a loving relationship. She will try to destroy you because of her inner shame. This hooker is honest enough to express a sentiment that many " normal" girls feel.

You simply have not dated enough to have encountered this.
Still trying to generalize from a single crack skank in a short youtube vid to all male female relationships.

So desperate.

So wrong.
 

DonJuanjr

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Still trying to generalize from a single crack skank in a short youtube vid to all male female relationships.

So desperate.

So wrong.
At what point does generalizing not apply? She's a human for one... Like all humans, she shjts, and farts, and burps. That's generalizing. She's a female... Therefore she has certain chromosomes, anatomy, and hormones... Why is her being an addict that monetizes herself put her in some far off spectrum of human where she doesn't have the capability to share any thought/emotional processes that other females may have?
 

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Pandora

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At what point does generalizing not apply? She's a human for one... Like all humans, she shjts, and farts, and burps. That's generalizing. She's a female... Therefore she has certain chromosomes, anatomy, and hormones... Why is her being an addict that monetizes herself put her in some far off spectrum of human where she doesn't have the capability to share any thought/emotional processes that other females may have?
I appreciate that you get it bro. The joebigship poster is a troll.

This poster says "stop generalizing" because this poster has no real counter points to my original premise. This prostitute is not exactly the same as an average girl but she has the same basic thought patterns. She is not some different species than the normal female. She is just an extreme version of the normal female.

The normal female exhibits the same emotions as this hooker. They just exhibit it to a lesser degree. The same basic model of " if a guy likes me, then he is not the best I can get" applies to many women. Some women will never be happy because they resent any man that truly values them. This hooker is honest and self aware enough to verbally state this.
 

BeExcellent

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I really scratch my head at times why there is animosity toward me personally. The best conclusion I can reach is that there is projection going on from the poster in question.

It’s odd too because in my opinion @Bokanovsky often is insightful in his own content and worth listening to. He doesn’t have to like me personally. He doesn’t have to believe me either. But why would I make stuff up? I don’t make stuff up. Furthermore it would be impossible to keep up a fake facade for 6 years and 5K posts. Utterly impossible.

My invite is real. I’ve nothing to hide on my end. But I do retain some privacy as we all do (if we are wise) because who knows who lurks on the Internet. I have met several people from here in real life. All are solid men. My avatars have always been actual photos of me. Recent photos. That’s all in the vien of being authentic about who I am for frame of reference sake.

I do respond to questions. Meh.

Back to the thread.

Cheers
 

Willie Naylor

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I'm not trying to be anything, this is who I am.

You're free to PM me whatever you think about me, you have my word and this post as proof that you won't be banned. Sounds like you're just mad and want to call me names or something, otherwise you'd just post it here. It's cool, I'm a grown as$ man, down to hash things out.

She was directly asked if she believes she's in the top 10% of women, she didn't just come out of the blue saying she's elite. Although now that I think about it I think she hasmentioned And @Bokanovsky had a good point that women can delude themselves into thinking they're in this bracket when they're not. In her case I believe she's actually in it. I think being rich is enough to be in that bracket for most men. Over time sure, all of us will have less to offer our potential partners, but that money attracts for a lifetime haha.

We don't have to agree on whether she's in the top 10%, I'm looking more at why that matters so much to you guys. For some reason you don't want to believe she's in that bracket. I have no idea why, but what difference does it make? That doesn't make her advice any less valid. Anyway PM me, I'll make this my last post here.
Generally speaking, Incels always find a way to get super wonky about things in an attempt to derail conversations.

Their lives are absolutely miserable and they have nothing to look forward to, so this is the absolute highlight of their day - when they get to find ways to argue with people online. They even have a theme song:

 
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