"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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The Worst Pain Of All.. Tooth Pain?

zekko

Master Don Juan
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Yeh I'm pretty sure tooth ache is worse
I might believe that if a woman told me (that it's worse than childbirth). Here's my toothache story:

I had an infected tooth and went to the dentist, got started on some painkillers and antibiotics. For whatever reason, whatever he gave me wasn't touching the pain, so out of desperation I started taking a few other things to make it stop, because it was driving me crazy (Yes, bad idea, I know, don't do this kids - I was young and stupid). I went to work and worked a full shift in misery, and I kept popping different analgesics along with the prescription. But still nothing touched the pain.

So I got off work, drove home, got into my yard and I became extremely nauseous (from all the pills I had taken, I'm sure), and I sunk to my knees in the grass and vomited. Funny thing, right after that I felt fine and my tooth stopped hurting, and it was fine from then on. Either the antibiotics finally kicked in, or the toxic level of painkillers I had taken finally did the job. But again, don't try this at home.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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