"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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The Still Unanswered question: C+F vs Charm

onthepath

Don Juan
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hi guys
i wanted to hear your experiences in adopting these two different schools of thought
i've been having some great success with C+F and a don't give a **** attitude - but i'm attracting the wrong girls for me
i attract the more confident (nice quality) but more arrogant and b!tchy girls

so i wanted to try going the other way. i've heard, but never witnessed of charming men, who although use flattery, dont wind up being a kiss ass, and still end up with the cool chicks, and especilly the more LTR chicks

i got this ebook How to Win Friends and Influence People and i've listened to the first chapter or so, and it's talking about prtty much being pleasant, and less critical of others - it's some pretty inspiring stuff i might add

anyway, can you guys shed some light on the subject
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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check_mate_kid_uk

Master Don Juan
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C&F is part of charm, thats like saying what is better a car or a set of car wheels.
 

Qmanchoo

Don Juan
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Here is way I look at it.

Wit is very charming to women.

C&F, _in part_, is a concept that helps you project a witty side to your personality. However, all the C&F things you say are somehow related to busting chops.

Is it healthy to always want to be subtley insulted by someone? Depends. Some women have a different emotional responses to it than others, however I've noticed that C&F attractes more of the "bad girls" thand "Good girls".

You can be witty, and as a result very charming, without busting balls.

Problem is that a lot of people aren't exactly witty. Or if they are it's not on call...only when they "are on a roll" so to speak.

That's where the concept of C&F helps you out.

As an extremely smart...off-the-wall-witty...and successful friend pointed out to me a long time ago "Busting balls got some women attracted to me, but wit worked on everyone and then I had my pick"
 

McKindley

Senior Don Juan
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I'm never ****y with girls. I just can't pull it off (and trust me, I've tried). But I'm always funny. So I'll be charming and funny, but not ****y. You can project plenty of confidence without being ****y. ****y always seemed like fake confidence to me (but hey, it might not be with you. That's just the way it feels to me when I'm doing it).

As long as you're funny and charming and not self depricating you're doing fine.

Part of the reason I don't like the ****y thing is, I hate it when I just met a girl and she starts trying to bust my balls. I'm just thinking, "hey, I don't know you. quit trying to bust on me."

But hey, if it works for you, use it. It just doesn't work for me.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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