The official Borderline Personality Disorder thread [Merged]

[Handcuffs]

HOLY MOTHER OF GOODNESS.......I have been mindfvcked.

I had no idea 'BPD' had even existed. I was simply jumping around the MM forum to entertain myself here @ work, and happened to magically stumble upon this thread. I took the time to read every single post, front to back, and I am bewildered how such a personality disorder can be so damaging to one's/significant other's welfare.

I'm not too sure if I feel comfortable absorbing all this knowledge. It's almost as if I feel this knowledge is a bit detrimental to my perception on females. The traits that specifically call out a 'BPD' female closely resembles ALL/MOST females (At least from my experiences). All females are psycho, some are just BEYOND psycho. From the looks of it, BPD's would be labeled as 'BEYOND psycho.'

How can one GUARANTEE that the female they're involved with is a bonafide 'BPD'??? How many BPD traits does a female need to possess to even consider her a BPD to even the slightest degree??? How many levels of BPD are there???

I ask because the woman I'm currently dating could very well be a BPD. Who knows...I sure as hell don't. Before I even consider pursuing the relationship any further than it is (I actually kinda like this girl), it'd be a tremendous help on my end if any of you gurus can possibly & accurately diagnose this woman.

It has only been three months since we've started dating, so I'll try my very best to make fair assessments regarding her behavior.

The following is my best attempt to describe her and her behavior as accurately as possible:

·A hands down HB10, who happens to be in the counseling profession (Psychology) and also models on the side. What a strange mix.....now that I come think about it.

·VERY seductive and VERY cunning. She knows EXACTLY what she's doing. Thankfully, I can sense it.

·EXTREMELY reserved disposition, up until you break through those gates. It's something I've been intrigued by as I am naturally a reserved/low key type of guy, up until I truly get to know a person. Same goes for her.

·I sense a bit of a lost identity. She doesn't know if she should further her education, travel abroad, focus on modeling, etc. A little all over the place I'd say, kind of like a drifter. From my experience though, that's a typical 'woman' trait though. A LOT of them lack direction.

·VERY manipulative, but I see right through that sh*t. I'll actually call her out on in a subliminal fashion..and it keeps her on her toes. I'm sure she's been able to get her way ALL her life just by her looks alone...I shuffled the deck and dealt her my cards. From what I've learned, MOST if not ALL beautiful women have the same fvcked up mindset. It's a power struggle with these types of women, for the most part.

·With that said, she's VERY insecure about her looks. It's amazing how most beautiful women are so damn insecure. It's fvcking mindboggling. She has asked me a few times, "Why don't you ever say I'm sexy? Why don't you ever compliment me?" I laugh it off and think to myself, "Why in the f*ck should I?" I usually reply back with, "OH c'mon now..I compliment you all the time", or something within those lines. Whatever.

·Though she actually mirrors me 'naturally' and vice versa (That's probably why we get along quite well), I've caught her 'TRYING' to mirror me..and I find it hilarious. I'll call her out on it and tell her, "Stop acting"..."You don't even come close to my awesomeness"..."Stop that silliness"....and other random jazz. Oh yeah, I've also looked her in the eyes and said, "You and your games. STOP while you're ahead." She replied back with, "ME? Games...I don't play games", BUT with a "OH SH*T, THIS DUDE SEES RIGHT THROUGH ME" look in her eyes. Funny.

·She's spoken very vaguely about her upbringing (It's a VERY touchy subject with her...I'm not one to twist anyone's arm when it comes to personal issues) But, what I do know is this. I know there was a case of infidelity between her father & mother. I couldn't tell you guys which one committed the act, but consequently, her mother left the household during her beginning stages of her adolescent years. During those years of growing, she would seek attention by rebelling against authority, partying at her empty parent's house, smoke herb, etc. Her mother caught wind of her behavior, and eventually moved back into the household. Currently speaking, I know she's VERY close to her Daddy...and actually pretty close to her Mommy as well.

·She's VERY needy for affection. She LOVES to be hugged, kissed, etc. It's actually pretty selfish in my eyes. She'll also ask me why I hardly call and give her attention when we're away from each other as well.

·She's currently out of town as I write this, and she's been in constant contact with me, more so than usual. Would it be safe to say that the 'fear of abandonment' would be the culprit??

·She enjoys to party (Drink & Smoke)

·I've caught her contradicting herself a few times. I don't know if these were sh!t tests or what not, but I found that very awkward.

·She's always stating that she has 'different sides' to her personality. Almost as if she's proud of it. In my eyes, EVERYONE has different sides. I'm just not too sure how EXTREME her 'different sides' are.

·ONE time, she stated that we were getting a little 'too comfortable.' I guess what she meant was she felt we were getting a little too 'close' for comfort. She said it was 'too much'. I backed off...and she came back running QUICK.
Weird.

·She feels like I criticize her often. She states that, "You make it seem like I'm not good enough." I am ALWAYS completely blown away when she states this as my comments directed at her were in no way directly trying to put her down. She's said that statement numerous times already. Talk about insecurities huh??? Even weirder.

·She LOVES/NEEDS reassurance...I'm telling you...it feels like she has NO CONFIDENCE deep inside. But that's how A LOT of beautiful girls usually are though...at least the ones I've been with.

·I haven't 'rejected' her full blown, but I've done some things where it may have seemed like I rejected her, and she did not take it lightly what so ever. I'd say it's safe for me to say that rejection is a BIG fear of hers.

·I sense a bit of 'childish' behavior in her. Nothing FULL BLOWN just yet...but I know it's there...I just can't take the temperature just yet. I'm not too sure if this is a biggie, because after all, women are best treated like children anyways.

·She states she's definitely the 'relationship' type. I know her last relationship was a bit rocky as her ex-fiance impregnated another woman. As far as her other relationships, I have no history on them. I'm positive she has baggage, I just don't know how heavy, YET.




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That's all my brain is letting me register right now. If any other behavior traits pop up, I'll make sure to edit and update.

Thanks in advance gentlemen!!!

 

[katatonia]

^ Sounds more like HPD which is very similar to BPD, minus the extreme abandonment fear and raging. Those are the main 2 differences I'd say.

 

[Crissco]

Dealing with a BPD Mother

It fuc*in kills me sometimes to know my mother has BPD. I love her dearly but sometimes she just does/says this sh1t that makes me go crazy. Ive delt with women who had BPD in the past, so I can pick it up pretty damn easy now. Like I said knowing your own mother has it, isnt the most pleasant of thoughts.
Any advice?

 

[jophil28]

Too bad you just can't NEXT her !

Limit your contact and set steely boundaries. SOP for adult children of Cluster B parents.

 

[Crissco]

Too bad you just can't NEXT her !

Limit your contact and set steely boundaries. SOP for adult children of Cluster B parents.

lol I wish bro, to bad its my own mother. I live with her too, its not that easy sometimes. Especially limiting contact. The boundary idea might just work, thanks.

 

[Blue Phoenix]

This is War - Resources

lol I wish bro, to bad its my own mother. I live with her too, its not that easy sometimes. Especially limiting contact. The boundary idea might just work, thanks.

Well what you can do to cope with her is to use counter-control, because cluster B people are extremely controlling and use a lot of blackmail (emotional, whatever it takes)

http://www.obgyn.net/displayarticle.asp?page=/yw/articles/Romeopart6
http://www.obgyn.net/displayarticle.asp?page=/yw/articles/Romeopart5
http://home.comcast.net/~pobrien48/Control_freaks.htm
http://www.askmen.com/dating/dating...appens-when-she-has-all-the-control-more.html (probably a BPD game)
http://www.askmen.com/dating/curtsmith_300/366_her-daddy-issues.html

All effective counter-control is rooted in understanding how a Controller manipulates someone’s conscience and uses it against him or her. Understanding how to prevent a Controller from manipulating your conscience is key in learning how to "counter - control." Moral integrity is one of the finest assets a person can possess, but it can attract a Controller the way a "hot target" attracts a cruise missile. The control freak needs to diminish you to feel better. Their mood rises as they push you down. They do not just want to prevail; they also need to believe that they have defeated you. They need you to feel helpless so they will not feel helpless.

The only thing predictable about such a Controller is his extreme unpredictability. It is only after you become intimately snared into him that you discover the soul-grinder that lies waiting to strike. Until then, you may even find him amazingly attentive, sensitive and empathic to your every need. That is why it´s critical to learn how to identify him, because there is a high probability that brutally sociopathic or sadistic-type personality disorders may hide behind his appealing camouflage of muted sensitivity. A BPD is a master at transforming other's sympathy into pity. In terms of being vulnerable to borderline-manipulation, anyone that is capable of compassion, protectiveness or love can be easily deceived by a Borderline.

Even though you can develop a very sophisticated form of personality-detection radar, it will never be as subtle or fine-tuned as a BPD. They have what seem like high-grade, instinctually built-in personality detection systems, comparable to extremely sophisticated phased-array radar systems used in the military for detecting high-speed, small ballistic projectiles, like the cruise missiles used to attack Iraq during the Gulf War. What can be especially disturbing to others about this chameleon-like "change-ability" is that BPDs are oblivious to what they are doing. He is the fox who fools the hunters. Early detection of borderline characteristics can be very difficult.

BPDs are what I call An F-117 Nighthawk stealth strike aircraft, when you see them for who they really are it will be too late!

Another thing you need is to set boundaries to yourself and not be taken in by their emotional blackmail, otherwise you´ll be their dinner. That´s why BPDs easily destroy anyone around them because they use your feelings (emotions) against you and you feel like a monster for standing up for yourself. They break up and go back with you many times, they normally have daddy issues (look for a father), they're trapped developmentally (which is usually between three to thirteen years of age), live in a Black and White World just like the song from Redemption - Black and White World.

Some Arsenal:

Boundaries - Henry Cloud
Too Perfect - Allan Mallinger
Emotional Blackmail - Susan Forward
Codependent No More - Melody Beattie
The Sociopath Next Door - Martha Stout
Surviving a Borderline Parent - Kimberlee Roth
Siren's Dance - Anthony Walker
33 Strategies of War - Robert Greene (lol, use this if you want to show them how to play hard ball!)

Dr. Hare's Checklist (Sociopathic Traits)

1. GLIB and SUPERFICIAL CHARM -- the tendency to be smooth, engaging, charming, slick, and verbally facile. Sociopathic charm is not in the least shy, self-conscious, or afraid to say anything. A sociopath never gets tongue-tied.

2. GRANDIOSE SELF-WORTH -- a grossly inflated view of one's abilities and self-worth, self-assured, opinionated, ****y, a braggart. Sociopaths are arrogant people who believe they are superior human beings.

3. NEED FOR STIMULATION or PRONENESS TO BOREDOM -- an excessive need for novel, thrilling, and exciting stimulation; taking chances and doing things that are risky. Sociopaths often have low self-discipline in carrying tasks through to completion because they get bored easily. They fail to work at the same job for any length of time, for example, or to finish tasks that they consider dull or routine.

4. PATHOLOGICAL LYING -- can be moderate or high; in moderate form, they will be shrewd, crafty, cunning, sly, and clever; in extreme form, they will be deceptive, deceitful, underhanded, unscrupulous, manipulative, and dishonest.

5. CONNING AND MANIPULATIVENESS- the use of deceit and deception to cheat, con, or defraud others for personal gain; distinguished from Item #4 in the degree to which exploitation and callous ruthlessness is present, as reflected in a lack of concern for the feelings and suffering of one's victims.

6. LACK OF REMORSE OR GUILT -- a lack of feelings or concern for the losses, pain, and suffering of victims; a tendency to be unconcerned, dispassionate, coldhearted, and un empathic. This item is usually demonstrated by a disdain for one's victims.

7. SHALLOW AFFECT -- emotional poverty or a limited range or depth of feelings; interpersonal coldness in spite of signs of open gregariousness.

8. CALLOUSNESS and LACK OF EMPATHY -- a lack of feelings toward people in general; cold, contemptuous, inconsiderate, and tactless.

9. PARASITIC LIFESTYLE -- an intentional, manipulative, selfish, and exploitative financial dependence on others as reflected in a lack of motivation, low self-discipline, and inability to begin or complete responsibilities.

10. POOR BEHAVIORAL CONTROLS -- expressions of irritability, annoyance, impatience, threats, aggression, and verbal abuse; inadequate control of anger and temper; acting hastily.

11. PROMISCUOUS SEXUAL BEHAVIOR -- a variety of brief, superficial relations, numerous affairs, and an indiscriminate selection of sexual partners; the maintenance of several relationships at the same time; a history of attempts to sexually coerce others into sexual activity or taking great pride at discussing sexual exploits or conquests.

12. EARLY BEHAVIOR PROBLEMS -- a variety of behaviors prior to age 13, including lying, theft, cheating, vandalism, bullying, sexual activity, fire-setting, glue-sniffing, alcohol use, and running away from home.

13. LACK OF REALISTIC, LONG-TERM GOALS -- an inability or persistent failure to develop and execute long-term plans and goals; a nomadic existence, aimless, lacking direction in life.

14. IMPULSIVITY -- the occurrence of behaviors that are unpremeditated and lack reflection or planning; inability to resist temptation, frustrations, and urges; a lack of deliberation without considering the consequences; foolhardy, rash, unpredictable, erratic, and reckless.

15. IRRESPONSIBILITY -- repeated failure to fulfill or honor obligations and commitments; such as not paying bills, defaulting on loans, performing sloppy work, being absent or late to work, failing to honor contractual agreements.

16. FAILURE TO ACCEPT RESPONSIBILITY FOR OWN ACTIONS -- a failure to accept responsibility for one's actions reflected in low conscientiousness, an absence of dutifulness, antagonistic manipulation, denial of responsibility, and an effort to manipulate others through this denial.

17. MANY SHORT-TERM MARITAL RELATIONSHIPS -- a lack of commitment to a long-term relationship reflected in inconsistent, undependable, and unreliable commitments in life, including marital.

18. JUVENILE DELINQUENCY -- behavior problems between the ages of 13-18; mostly behaviors that are crimes or clearly involve aspects of antagonism, exploitation, aggression, manipulation, or a callous, ruthless tough-mindedness.

19. REVOCATION OF CONDITION RELEASE -- a revocation of probation or other conditional release due to technical violations, such as carelessness, low deliberation, or failing to appear.

20. CRIMINAL VERSATILITY -- a diversity of types of criminal offenses, regardless if the person has been arrested or convicted for them;

It´s impressive how BPDs and Sociopaths traits overlap, both are experts at using "Pity Play". It seems that the biggest difference is that BPDs are driven by their emotions and fears of abandonment, while the Sociopath has no feelings at all. It´s funny that the Sociopath is the one who can handle the BPD as he has no emotions, after him comes the NPD who takes no sh!t and is somewhat immune to BPDs game (he has emotions but not empathy).
http://www.experienceproject.com/stories/Have-Borderline-Personality-Disorder/461161
http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2008/03/27/the-borderline-personality-as-transient-sociopath/

If you´ve been raised by a cluster B parent you will either be one of them (as He or She was your role model), manipulating everyone around you or you will try to be their total opposite; trying to appease others because you´ve been trained to be used and abused. You have no escape unless you take charge of your life by breaking this vicious cycle once and for all (recognizing and protecting yourself from them). The problem is that these people are in a FOG and don´t know they are there. I´m done with this topic, that´s enough! See you around...

 

[boomerick]

second thoughts

 

[Jitterbug]

http://shrink4men.wordpress.com/201...nic-women-mr-guilty-by-loudon-wainwright-iii/

 

[aimchase]

Guys, I can't believe i've actually found somewhere where people can relate to the s**t i've had to deal with.

Met on internet in Spring of 2004.

Met in person about six weeks later. She travelled 200 miles to see me and spent the weekend with me. We slept together first night.
She loved it and came round every weekend, then after about five visits, 'collapsed' and said she was too ill to go home.

She stayed for a considerable time and spoke of her feelings for me. I was far more casual about things but she was 'full-on'. In my inexperience, I was overwhelmed by her commitment to me and accepted her. She threw her job and everything else to move in with me (turned out she's done this with a couple of guys before).

I had a full-time job which she didn't like as I left her at home. One morning she tells me that she's let me down and needs to punish herself. She takes an OD. I go home, she's admitted to hospital. Because her vulnerability took my attention, I lost my job.

Two weeks after this I was out when she called, screaming down the phone. She claimed she had been attacked by an unknown man. I called police and got home. She was severely cut and bruised. Police ordered us out of flat for forensics. She also claimed she'd been raped. After a few days the police confirmed that no evidence of break-in or any other DNA was found. Turned out she manufactured the whole thing and caused the injuries to herself - the cuts being with done with sewing needles.

For some mad reason I considered her to be in poor mental health and wanted to help her.

Relationship then went well for about eight months. She was keen to prove herself to my family, and all went good.

March 05, she falls pregnant. She said she was on pill so 'doesn't know how it happened'. I was shocked and felt a bit numb at first, but understood that I was as much to blame. I then came round to the idea and by the time I saw the first ultrasound, I was hugely proud and excited.

Dec 05, our baby boy is born.

Feb 05 - for next two years relationship is strained due to her suffering PND. She is a chronic depressive anyway and takes daily medication, but it's not helping.

May 07 - Relationship improved for some time and getting on well again. We get married.

July 07 - She wants second child. I always wanted two children. I agreed but voiced that we had to consider the PND issues that it may cause and agree to work through it.

July 08 - second child born, a gorgeous girl

September 08 - ok, now we're kicking off. She goes quiet and distant. I immediately think it's PND. She leaves her computer on one night though, and I find she's having an EA with some guy in London. She declares her love for him and says she's ready to run to him. They're both trading graphic pictures - her of close ups of her pu$$y, him with erections.

I confront her and ask how she could do this considering our newborn. She can't deal with it. She walks downstairs, drinks a half bottle of vodka, then a catalogue of pills.

Nee-naw-nee-naw - ambulance again! She's taken to hospital, is detoxicated, and is assigned mental health workers.

I now see that this is the easy way out. Don't want to deal with the questions? Just OD and turn the sympathy back onto myself. Oh, and I have mental health workers so none of this is my fault, i'm officially sick!

Few days later, begs for my forgiveness. Says it's all just fantasy because she felt so lonely. Says she needs me and her family. I forgive her considering it was EA and not PA, and I want to be a live-in dad to my new family.

Feb 09 - she plays keyboard and joins a band. I encourage her, as do her mental health workers, to find a passion and some self-esteem. Bad mistake!

March 09 - July 09 - she becomes obsessed with the band. She loses 70lbs in weight (i'm seriously not kidding). She plays every weekend. I stay at home being a hermit with the kids, she comes home drunk after each gig, revelling in the attention she's getting (she's very attractive).
She also starts buying clothes with fake credit. Tell me she's borrowing it from friends. She's since been sued. Saying that, not all the clothes were bought fraudulently, she was spending all her money on treating herself, whilst all my cash was going on rent, bills, shopping etc.

August 09 - she's completely gone into another world for some time now. She comes home from a gig at 2am after asking me to wait up for her. I do so. She falls through the front door, then tell me to f**k off when I ask what the hell she's doing. I can't take anymore of this - it's time to call the shots. I tell her i'm leaving her (I was hoping that by going for a while she'd have a wake-up call and realise what she'd done).

She didn't though. But boy do the calls keep raining in. She needs this, she needs that etc etc. I pick kids up at weekends.

Sept 09 - I have holiday so we go out for the day. I take wife and family back, she asks me to stay over. We have a few drinks in the evening. She says she wants to reconcile and take 'baby steps'. I'm torn but still love her. We have mad sex (the sex has always been phenomenal, she'll do absolutely anything and we know exactly what buttons to press with each other).
She then goes to bed early but for the last couple of hours has been texting like mad on her cell phone. I can't help but look (as she says she wants to start again). Turns out they're filthy text messages to some other guy, saying how she's going to deep throat him etc, and him responding with equally graphic messages.
I confront her again, asking why she'd ask me to reconcile when she's doing this. She just tells me to get out and punches me in the back (it didn't really hurt). I leave.

Oct 09 - She asks to reconcile again and suggests a meal one Saturday. However, whilst having the children the day before, she asks if I can get the dog as she's been invited to a hen party in London and is to leave first thing in the morning. I call her cell phone and hear that she's in a car with an OM.
On the Sunday she returns and says that it's 'early days'. It turns out he lives 100 miles away. I later find out that spider caught herself another fly - she's 30, he's 24 and is a bit of a philosophical chap, going through a rough patch. She found him on myyearbook (she gets all her guys through the internet).

She continues to run to OM every weekend from thereon but claims she only said it might be intimate, to 'p*ss me off'. She claims he's a platonic friend.
However, each weekend when I have the children, she refuses to come home at the agreed pick-up times. On three occasions she didn't turn up until the Monday, causing me to miss time off work and eanring me a warning.

I go to my solicitor with an abundance of evidence including a diary of everything that had happened since August, and a catalogue of graphic images that she'd been taking of herself, to post to people online.

To cut this short, we initially start a custody battle but later agree that the children are well looked after. We do cement contact though so she can't keep pulling stunts of not turning up for handover of the kids.

Jan 10 - She comes home from seeing OM at the weekend and comes to my house (whilst I have the kids). She asks how i'd feel about reconciliation. I say a lot has happened and i'm still hurt. I still wasn't strong and a part of me pined for my family back. She 'swears on the children's lives' that there is no relationship with the OM, they are just friends, yet since adding OM's circle of friends on her FB page she updated her status to 'in a relationship'. She claims she's done this because other men keep bothering her and she wants them to leave her alone.
I accept her comment based on her oath (though I won't swear anything on my children). We have a nice evening, and yes, sex.

Since then, she has been inviting me round at times during the week, and even at times during the weekend when OM or 'platonic friend' wasn't about. Each time I visit though (I liked to as I got to spend time with the kids), the cell phone is beeping more than roadrunner. A lot of them are OM, to which she exchanges messages every 30 mins or so.

When i'm having the kids at weekends, she will often say that she'll be around and would like to join us, yet all the time she's away with OM.

The final nail in the coffin was recently when someone forwarded me a message that she'd emailed to OM. She'd been sending him pictures of her masturbating herself. You don't do that with a platonic friend.

Her health worker has pretty much confirmed HPD. She is a manipulative, lying, deceitful piece of sh*t who has tried to keep me in her life for months and months, yet all along has been engaged with other men. OM is no starlet though - at the same time as seeing him, she frequents dating sites, speaks dirty to men on MSN every evening, there's just no let up.

I've also found she was likely having an affair with a bar owner where the band played, just before we separated.

She's in a huge amount of debt, buries her head in the sand in everything. I've now asked her for divorce and have sounded her out on the images to OM. She knows there's nowhere left to hide.

That said, i'd be amazed if she doesn't now scheme a new plan to get me onside.

I just wish I didn't have the kids with her. The kids are my life but her as the mother means contact has to be LC. If I could have just changed my address, numbers, everything, and disappeared forever, I would have.

To anyone who has been through this for years with children in the equation - does she eventually focus her energy on others, or am I to be a target for years and years to come? How do I best deal with things going forward?

Sorry for the inanely long post. I tried to keep it short!

 

[Zodiac]

I typed a long response that I lost due to inactivity so if you want me to clarify things I will. Before I type this just know I am a bit scatter brained so bare with me. My roommate and I both have expeiriences involving Bpd chicks.

Back in my junior year of high school I knew a chick that got raped. She and I made friends really quickly and she sucked me into her world. She was a good friend until one day I began to date a girl.

She made friends with her and slowly over the course of 3 months ruined the relationship between my gf and me. Now I'm not just saying it but she really would do things to ruin it like call me and get me to help her out but then would call my gf and mention he doesn't spend time with you as much as a good bf should, etc... till the point my gf and I broke up. I was back in the depressed mindset and all the Bpd's pawn.

Later on I broke free and never went back. I was at my friend's funeral and she went to help me through it and during it I noticed she was trying to turn herself into the center of attention. I let it go figuring it was a coping thing but I realized she didn't know the guy at all. Later on when her and I were alone I asked her why she did that and she TWEAKED out on me. (She screamed at me, hit me, threatened me and finally tried to act like nothing was wrong all in about 10 minutes) My response was simply; "You didn't know the guy and you disrespected a dear friend of mine by being an attention *****. Now never talk to me again."

I left her before she could damage me further. Later on I found out she cheated on her then bf with a frat guy, got knocked up and now has a daughter. I feel so bad for that child.

Now my roommate on the other hand is in a relationship with a Bpd who is my other roommate. She was the nicest girl in the world and when she moved in with him and I she became a slob, would not clean her dishes, sleep 12 hours a day, would go out and party with her friends but he couldn't do anything with his friends since it would most likely lead to cheating (her own words... Hypocrite?) and would throw tantrums where she would break things and demean him to the point he would not care anymore about anything.

He hasn't left her though only since he himself is damaged to an extent. He dated a girl for 4 years and was engaged to her when she died in a carwreak overseas. He had Ptsd from that and various other **** in his life so he really doesn't care for much (gun in his face, robbed at age 14 or so, been cheated on various times, and much more ****) so he doesn't care at all about life anymore.

Now to those people who say their is something we men have done to be accountable of sorts... complete bull****. I did nothing and I got out before she really sunk her claws into me but my roommate has done nothing to deserve her. These people are horrid and souless corpses that are Satan's children in my opinion. They are very childish and don't deserve to be happy since they are walking human wreaking balls.

**** Bpd girls. That is not bitterness speaking just the truth. If they can't get help for themselves and actually like in the case of my roommate ruin lives. They aren't people in my eyes.

 

[horaholic]

Zodiac, you're gonna have to come up with some better examples than that. That is psycho chick behaviour, no doubt, but BPD is much worse than that. You cant just throw BPD at every psycho chick, cuz they are ALL a little psycho to a degree.

 

[Zodiac]

Zodiac, you're gonna have to come up with some better examples than that. That is psycho chick behaviour, no doubt, but BPD is much worse than that. You cant just throw BPD at every psycho chick, cuz they are ALL a little psycho to a degree.

I don't care if you believe me or not but since I have a roommate that I live with that is a diagnosed one that takes 2 30 mg of Prozac daily, I tend to now look back at the behaviors of crazy as **** women I know or knew and find a **** load of similarities to this girl, hear things from mutual friends that tell me things when we catch up so I get other people that are college students doing various things with their life (Two Criminology majors, an English and a Sociological Psychology majors. I am a Sociology and Criminology major myself) that give their opinions on her as well and all 5 of us kind of agree on this girl that attacked me when I was in the car that night on the way back from that funeral is a Bpd.

For my crazy roommate she was a military dependent american child living in Korea till she was 16 then transferred to the US to go to high school, Dad treated his family like the military does, she had tons of "horrible" relationships with guys (She has NO sex drive. Being roommates I talked to her about it when one day when I came back late in the evening from seeing a girl. She point up asked me why I ****ed just about anything and slowly she forced the fact she hates sex into the mix. All about her even when she asked me a question.) All I know is I'm stuck living with her till the end of summer due to the lease I am in and can't afford to pay the extra money to get out of the lease but the other one that hit me is another story.

She was a victim of rape, no father figure, lives with step father since her mom was a drug addict that was in jail at the time I knew her, known to cheat on a majority of her partners, almost every other word out of her mouth was some type of exclaimation proclaiming how she either hated life or something almost killed her and then she would tell some story that would lead to so much bull**** that was found out to be lies.

Now the biggest thing this crazy ***** did was in front of my eyes the solidifies her in my mind as a Bpd no matter what anyone says was when she tweaked out on me in the car after the funeral as I posted about above, when I called her out on her ****. We were driving and she just was going on in a nice normal tone of voice like it was a regular ****ing tuesday or something. She was so happy around everyone being miserable and didn't really seem to care. The things she was saying at the time were insensative and hurtful to me when I told her she really hurt me then told her my little speech from my last post she screamed at me, hit me across the face and threw my **** in my car around the car, slammed her feet to the point she was trying to break the floor it seemed like at the time, cried in a moaning wail type event. I said nothing and I swear it was like 10 minutes or so she asks if I was hungry. 5 minutes later I dropped her off and erased her from my life by severing ties to her. I honestly could care less if she was a Cluster B or Bpd but I've lived with a Bpd for a bit now and she did EXACTLY what the Bpd does now in that temper tantrum.

From what I have seen from what my roommate deals with, where my female roommate will whine for a back rub, my male roommate won't do it for 5 minutes while he is in the middle of a Call of Duty match; She will A) Run over and hit the controller and **** everything up B) Whine like a dog (I'm being serious) and continue till he gives in C) Just stare in a souless sort of way (Watch any horror movie with a sociopath and watch when they get that look in the eye right before they kill their victim in the film. That's the look I am talking about.) D) Pur like a cat... I can go on with more things she does to be annoying to get your attention until you give her what she wants. Lucky me she already know I won't put up with too much of her ****.
Now for other **** she does like I have posted in the past through various post but found as much as I have posted about: She is lazy as hell to the point she will do annoying childish voices till you just either A) Tell her off or shut up and ignore her which then she pouts and then sits in her room *****ing on the phone to her parents and eventually I or my other roommate get a call from her parents screaming at us after she told them some elaborate story that is nothing close to reality or B) Give in and see a look in her eyes that you just know she got off on treating you like a child. She will cook food and never clean but will freak out if no one else cleans, can party with her friends on a girls night out with other guys but when my roommate even mentions wanting to go out and party like old times she will cry and mention he wants to cheat on her as that is the sole reason he wants to party (Her own words) or my favorite is my male roommate has no female friends due to him getting tired of the crying she would pull when she read he was hanging out with a female friend (He really doesn't cheat period and likes to talk to people so he makes friends with people, girls moreso since they in his words are easier to talk to) but 90 percent of her friends are guys and the time he mentioned it she played the "Don't you trust me card?"

I'm done ranting about this subject. Its not mentally productive and if you want to not believe or doubt what I say then go ahead. The major point I was trying to make the whole first post and I hope people get it is: Bpd women are parasites that take good men, and destroy them till they can't feel anymore. To me they are Satan spawn and after living with one (Not my choice as it was just me and my male roommate to begin with but money troubles changed it to where she lived with us) I honestly understand you probably won't believe me and that's cool.

 

[horaholic]

Damn, that chick sounds like she's perpetually three years old!

 

[brokenupinside]

Wow,I was reading through this earlier in the morning and guess what,my ex calls me out of the blue this morning and she went on and on about my new GF and a whole lot of crap.
She broke up with me 2 years ago and I have had a bunch of emails that I never answered and about a call every two months steady....she did not miss the schedule....again!

 

[Heretolearn]

Guys, I can't believe i've actually found somewhere where people can relate to the s**t i've had to deal with.

so sorry to read that. I cannot offer any advice unfortunately except thanks for sharing and I hope that you make the most of this situation somehow. I truly dont know how you managed through all of this.

Your kids are innocent & a blessing though and I hope you can put your good energy into them.

 

[Disco]

if you have been with a bpd girl you'll know it. it won't be like dealing with women, which is hard enough in itself. at the beginning she'll seem EXACTLY like you...you fall in love with yourself pretty much. you'll spend a year or so with her and the rolls get reversed. the relationship will end with being the crazy one and her almost sucking your strong personality out and onto herself.

 

[Bluntmaster]

if you have been with a bpd girl you'll know it. it won't be like dealing with women, which is hard enough in itself. at the beginning she'll seem EXACTLY like you...you fall in love with yourself pretty much. you'll spend a year or so with her and the rolls get reversed. the relationship will end with being the crazy one and her almost sucking your strong personality out and onto herself.

True story right here. They know exactly what to do in the beginning and once they have you hooked they turn into an evil b!tch.

 

[englishman]

Id get custody of the kids. Keep the silly b1tch of a mother at arms length and hop the kids take after you and not their mother,

 

[Die Hard]

Id get custody of the kids. Keep the silly b1tch of a mother at arms length and hop the kids take after you and not their mother,

Indeed. I am the victim of a BPD mom myself. If BPD's can do what they do to grown up men, imagine what they could do to a helpless child that's totally dependent of her and can't just "NEXT" her... If there's a chance to get custody over the kids, you should fight for it.

 

[jophil28]

In summary,two quotes which fit -

" Never go to be with someone who is crazier that you." Kris Kristofferson.

" If you play with plutonium, expect contamination." Uncle Bernie.