The *No Contact* Challenge! ( Read this if you just got dumped)

[TBG]

How long were you with her for?

Not long, like three months.

Basically we went out, the following week she went out with him, a few days later he left the country. We continued dating weekly.

He was always in the background and that was her reason for not wanting to get serious with me. Really I should've walked away the minute I found out about the other guy.

Like I said she seems to have built this relationship up in her head on the basis of two dates and stuff he's said. It wouldn't surprise me if he just seen it as sex last time and easy sex when he's back before he's on his travels again

 

[QuadDeuces]

My long distance girlfriend of 5 months dumped me the day before yesterday through text.
She "loves me, but thinks I will be happier without her, and she wishes me the best of luck in my life".
I didn't reply, then went to a FWB, we had a great date smoked a ton of weed together and I blew 5 loads in 16 hours.

 

[Murk]

Day 13

Checked her instagram (don't judge me), she's gone to see Phantom of the Opera this evening. Before we broke up she had posted nothing since November when we had a mini break, and before that nothing since April 2017 - now she has posted 5 pics in 2 weeks which is 30% of her total instagram. Tempted to block her from it for my own sake. I'm putting way too much thought into this. Still miss her.

 

[European-DJ]

Day 13

Checked her instagram (don't judge me), she's gone to see Phantom of the Opera this evening. Before we broke up she had posted nothing since November when we had a mini break, and before that nothing since April 2017 - now she has posted 5 pics in 2 weeks which is 30% of her total instagram. Tempted to block her from it for my own sake. I'm putting way too much thought into this. Still miss her.

Nobody is going to judge you, because we have all been in the same situation where the urge builds up inside us and we need to act on the impulse.

Personally, I would block her social media profiles; why? Because even though you want her back badly (we all do, regardless of what we do and say), that is not the purpose of NC. The purpose is to gain some distance, get over the person and THEN reflect on whether we want the relationship back or not.

I am probably among the guys with the largest heart-ace after break-ups. I really get attached to people who are in my life for >1 year. Nevertheless, I stay strong knowing that I ALWAYS think back at my relationships acknowledging that towards the end the bad overruled the good.

We all had good times with our Exes; That's what brought us to the NC, because we still have profound feelings towards them. However, whatever caused the break-up and whoever initiate did so because they were not satisfied with the situation. When your heart and brain truly understands this and realizes that the break-up was for the best, then youl'll go days without thinking about her.

 

[Murk]

Wise words

 

[QuadDeuces]

Got dumped Sunday and today I got a friend request on Facebook from a fake dummy profile.

Who could that be?

 

[Gan]

Day 61
Forgot to post yesterday. During the early days of NC I felt like complete sh*t. I felt unmotivated and could not focus on anything I tried putting my mind into. I thought about her so much that I could not focus on my priorities (school, work, etc.) or hobbies. I've been doing pretty good compared to day 1. I've been going to the gym much more often now so my body fat has lowered and I've gotten most if not all of my strength back. I'm also taking up MMA in a few weeks and I'm really looking forward to it. School started about 3 weeks ago so that's another thing to keep me busy. I'm also learning about the stock market and have started investing what I had available, and I am pretty excited to save up more money to add more funds.
Since I got school and the stock market to worry about now, I hardly have time to think about her anymore. She does not come to mind that often, and I feel relieved to be out of that stressful fling. I have absolutely no desire to contact her, and if I don't hear from her either then no biggie.

 

[Murk]

Day 15 - happy birthday to me.

I’m on the train to work from a girls house this morning. Much better than the hb5 I banged last Sunday.

The sex was really good for the first time, she’s really tactile too so I felt the closeness I had been missing since my ex.

I’m in a good place again, I won’t think about her today or care when she inevitably doesn’t wish me a HBD.

 

[TBG]

7 days since I last spoke to her.

I'm not doing too bad. In the grand scheme of things it was a nothing relationship and didn't get far along enough for me to catch too many feels.

Still sucks not being able to speak to that person. It didn't end on bad terms and the offer of 'friends' was there but I refuse to be drawn back in and used as a placeholder and emotional support for some other guys gain.

It still pisses me off thinking back to the times she told me she wanted to die and I'd genuinely concerned because she's attempted suicide twice in the past. I'd be there for her, I'd pick her up and all the while she was planning a future with another guy. A guy that probably has no idea what's been going on in her head recently, oh well that's his responsibility now.

 

[Murk]

Emailed her last night while drunk "I miss you kind mad"

Makes no sense, why on earth did I do it!?!

She didn't reply (rightfully so).

 

[Catfish]

Emailed her last night while drunk "I miss you kind mad"

No offence, but why in this world would you write such embarrassing love crap in the first place? I won't say "learn from it" because I am very confident that you knew before that she won't read that and - in a moment of ecstasy - hop on an Uber and rush over to your place to smash with you all night long. So all I can say is: just stop using your smart phone while drinking for the next few weeks

 

[Murk]

No offence, but why in this world would you write such embarrassing love crap in the first place? I won't say "learn from it" because I am very confident that you knew before that she won't read that and - in a moment of ecstasy - hop on an Uber and rush over to your place to smash with you all night long. So all I can say is: just stop using your smart phone while drinking for the next few weeks

I know it's so cringeworthy, I think I got it out of my system though and happy to move forward.

 

[Billtx49]

I know it's so cringeworthy, I think I got it out of my system though and happy to move forward.

Yes, it’s easier to act on an impulse while under the influence. As you discovered, remnants of feelings and alcohol don’t generally mix well together.

 

[Murk]

I think she probably blocked my gmail account so most likely did not even see the email thank god.

Day 20 - thought about her last night and this morning. What’s wrong with me?

 

[Catfish]

I think she probably blocked my gmail account so most likely did not even see the email thank god.

Day 20 - thought about her last night and this morning. What’s wrong with me?

Wrong is that you don't go out and eat some ass. Stop this stupid "feelings" crap already! You have wasted 20 days so far, this must end!

 

[Catfish]

Let me do an example.

LTR broke up because she thought she misses out on some random dudes **** (of course she framed is as "struggling for some excitement that only a new, fresh love can bring").

Day1: Put her on the plane back home, started enjoying my new freedom. I value myself too much for that kind of bs.
Day2: Had an escort come over, then I smoked a cuban cigar, had some kick ass scottish whiskey and set up Tinder
Day3: Relaxing on the beach, recovering from hang over of last night. Damn, that feels so good to do whatever I want
Day4: Tinderdate, kissclose, no smashing
Day5: Second try on that chick from Tinder, this time ... crazy ass eatery
Day6: Went clubbing, did a lot of chit chat to get back into the game. Got a few numbers, no kiss close tho
Day7: Met a chick from the "3some" app lol. No kissclose, no fc - however, she is bi and totally into threesomes and other kinky stuff. Hopefully i can work out something with this girl at a different time. For the moment, we're just buddies!
Day8: Sitting here and telling you: Don't let some stupid feelings eat away at you. Be dirty, be a dirty wh0re, be something but promise me to not feel "in love" while she is getting ready for the c0ck carousel.

Footnote: Just my personal experience: Tinder usually does not work so well. Why it probably (!!) works for me is because I am personally going for an aggressive DHV money game. I am totally aware that I am probably reeling in gold diggers, but then again ... I couldn't care less. 3some works better, if you are creepy f*cked up and have some crazy fetishes, chances are definitely in your favor.

 

[Murk]

Bro you obviously don’t read my posts here, I have been on dates, I’ve fvcked girls, I’ve cold approached girls, I’ve chat to numerous on OLD - pretty much every avenue I have explored in the last 20 days.

I didn’t even want to spend my future with this girl.

 

[Catfish]

I didn’t even want to spend my future with this girl.

Sorry, seems I have just read the tip of the iceberg then. Well, you seem to be on the right track then. You just have to understand that she is probably testing the waters with a new guy already (easy branch swinging). That is, a woman will never break up with or leave a man if she doesn't have another branch firmly in her grasp. Be aware of the fact that she will not be your LTR ever again...Let that sink in and move on. No need to "miss her hard".

 

[Murk]

I know she was planning to branch as she even went on a date with some nerd during one of our breaks and she was arranging to go for a drink with another guy, “third time lucky” - we kept getting back together so she didn’t go but I know by now she will be searching for new d1ck. I called her out on that and she’s said of course she’s trying to find someone that will treat her right - I couldn’t argue and didn’t really care as I know I’ve been doing worse the whole time behind her back and not really doing nice things her - romantic gestures etc

I am the prize, I am admittedly the best s3x she has had and made her O more than anyone else.

She needs to be happy I treated her like sh1t - she slapped me on 3 occasions and in December I backhanded her in her mouth and cut her lip - toxic. I never want to be that guy - we brought the worst out in each other. But no new guy will be better than me, I’m already trying to bang a hb9 I cold approached a few days ago.

But something about this girl has got me, maybe before it didn’t end on my terms despite me agreeing to the break.

 

[QuadDeuces]

Guys don't over analyze, you'll drive yourself crazy.