The *No Contact* Challenge! ( Read this if you just got dumped)

[Justme40]

Day 22

I'm on day 22 and I'm having a hard day today . Some days are good some are like today... It sucks! I know things will get better as time goes on

 

[Noyou]

OMG IM LOLIMG HARD

Ok so, last week I got 3 random friend requests from obvious bogus profiles, 2 unknown calls from "unknown," and her next door neighbor checked out my online dating profile.

Also I blocked her and her friends on facebook, granted I can still see the mini thumbnail on some of my older comments, but I noticed the comments are no longer there.

LOL she blocked me or deactivated her facebook.

Obvious ploy is obvious

 

[SoSuave666]

OMG IM LOLIMG HARD

Ok so, last week I got 3 random friend requests from obvious bogus profiles, 2 unknown calls from "unknown," and her next door neighbor checked out my online dating profile.

Also I blocked her and her friends on facebook, granted I can still see the mini thumbnail on some of my older comments, but I noticed the comments are no longer there.

LOL she blocked me or deactivated her facebook.

Obvious ploy is obvious

Should not concern you in the least. It's sad that we have come to a point where game playing is no longer done in person, but rather via social media. My most recent ex, after we split, used to like my mother's comments and pictures and invite her to like certain pages. She also liked all my ex girlfriend's things. Just complete buffoonery. It didn't bother me too much, but then it did start to weasel its way into my mind. I did something I never thought I'd do and I blocked her and had my mom block her too. Fvcking crazy how chicks will do anything for attention.

If I were you, I'd just block her. I'm sure you're past the point of caring, but blocking her will ensure you never have to see her again.

 

[Noyou]

Should not concern you in the least. It's sad that we have come to a point where game playing is no longer done in person, but rather via social media. My most recent ex, after we split, used to like my mother's comments and pictures and invite her to like certain pages. She also liked all my ex girlfriend's things. Just complete buffoonery. It didn't bother me too much, but then it did start to weasel its way into my mind. I did something I never thought I'd do and I blocked her and had my mom block her too. Fvcking crazy how chicks will do anything for attention.

If I were you, I'd just block her. I'm sure you're past the point of caring, but blocking her will ensure you never have to see her again.

The thing is I did, but her comments are set in stone on some of my profile pics that I like.

I just find it funny now that it doesn't bother me anymore, but she is more than likely still trying to get attention. Another key thing is I started going out even more since my job requires me to go out a lot more, I start talking to women and they want to take the "selfie" with me in the picture and tag me in the posts. More than likely she's seeing this and not digging it too much so she wants to see what I'm up to. Some of them I've made good friends with, some of them, there is a spark (if you know what I mean)

Clearly after last weeks events, this would be the case and she clearly wants me to do something rash with all these attempts.

I expect attempts to increase, and I'll just keep going out and having an awesome time.

 

[mikey2012]

Day 1 not contact.

My chick left me 10 days ago to go back to her fiance. (she cheated on him with me, ended their engagement and wanted to be with me for a time) and while i did go no contact and she did come back i let her back in to soon. and before i knew it was reaching out to her every few days.

Called her on the phone. and she at least gave me some closure. said that she wishes i would have shown this affection for her sooner, but she's working things out with her fiance. i asked her if she was going to put he ring back on. conversation got tense. she didn't want to answer. probably because she didn't know for sure.

she wanted to stay friends. told her why that's not possible. hung up the phone she sent me more text asking why. told her again. Cried almost the entire night. Deactivated Facebook, deleted my Instagram and deactivated my Pinterest account. I don't want to be tempted anymore to look at her life through the veiled glass of social media. and now here I am.

I watched some day game videos and honestly for some reason that got me energized. Because I feel that's all i need to do is just let this ish go and get back out there. I haven't thought about her all day. I'll update on day 15.

Man you dodged a bullet. I went with a chick that was married only for one year . In fact she made moves on me before she was married. She actually moved to be with me for a short time and ditched the hubby. Now she's back with the loser who took her back. Why would you even want to be with a woman like that? You know it will end badly. If there's any satisfaction they will probably be divorced in a few years. Marriages that start like that are doomed to fail.

 

[cfdagola]

Man you dodged a bullet. I went with a chick that was married only for one year . In fact she made moves on me before she was married. She actually moved to be with me for a short time and ditched the hubby. Now she's back with the loser who took her back. Why would you even want to be with a woman like that? You know it will end badly. If there's any satisfaction they will probably be divorced in a few years. Marriages that start like that are doomed to fail.

you know she told me, and I also saw it when we were just "talking"

but when she was "planning" the wedding she was sorta a stick in the mud about it. there was no excitement or passion that i saw in my friends new wives.

they were all like OMG lets go here lets look at this, lets do that! they were so excited and happy this chick. she openly said so what i have a ring on. nothing has changed in my mind.

she called it boyfriend 2.0 and for the first 4 months that they were engaged she didn't even call him fiance. there was no passion in her engagement. other than showing off her "pretty ring"

kinda reminds me of my friend katie she got married was with the guy for 8 years. they got married and i believe they were married for 2 years. anyway soon as she got a promotion to leave the state she was GONE in literally 2 weeks. and boom she started dating someone else in her new location.

needless to say the divorce papers are in process. this guy my chick went back to He's posted some pics of her publicly on facebook. she doesn't even look at the camera basically he takes pictures of the back of her head. but she says they're working on things and she is trying to get out of the job she's in right now considering she works with him, his parents and all his parents friends. Maybe she wants to get out because she doesn't want to be working at some crap job with her future husband. I did apologize for getting between them and she said don't because i'm not sorry.

 

[mikey2012]

you know she told me, and I also saw it when we were just "talking"

but when she was "planning" the wedding she was sorta a stick in the mud about it. there was no excitement or passion that i saw in my friends new wives.

they were all like OMG lets go here lets look at this, lets do that! they were so excited and happy this chick. she openly said so what i have a ring on. nothing has changed in my mind.

she called it boyfriend 2.0 and for the first 4 months that they were engaged she didn't even call him fiance. there was no passion in her engagement. other than showing off her "pretty ring"

kinda reminds me of my friend katie she got married was with the guy for 8 years. they got married and i believe they were married for 2 years. anyway soon as she got a promotion to leave the state she was GONE in literally 2 weeks. and boom she started dating someone else in her new location.

needless to say the divorce papers are in process. this guy my chick went back to He's posted some pics of her publicly on facebook. she doesn't even look at the camera basically he takes pictures of the back of her head. but she says they're working on things and she is trying to get out of the job she's in right now considering she works with him, his parents and all his parents friends. Maybe she wants to get out because she doesn't want to be working at some crap job with her future husband. I did apologize for getting between them and she said don't because i'm not sorry.

Forget that low class ho. Karma is a biatch. She won't live a happy life. Do you really want to be in the position of the fiancé ? Imagine getting married and your wife cheats on you. Do you really need think you are going to be happy？Believe me it wI'll end badly.

 

[YeeZus]

So I saw her today. Her manager sits just beside me and she just walked in to have a chat with him. As soon as she said "Hi" I knew it was her but I din't turn around or something but she was around for long. She's been all cool while talking as everything was alright with her and her life and look at me sitting her writing this to vent this out.

I'm currently having a bad time. This new job sucks and makes me more stressed out. Currently looking for a new job wish me luck guys.

 

[cfdagola]

I am sorry to hear this man, but there are some lessons here I would like to point out, for other's benefits, in bold.





You will be better off without her, watch and see.

You're right. I'm starting to thing back to when we were talking. she kept dictating what i need to do.

like she said. "when you see me at work, give me a proper hello and a hug". and one time she came over i just sorta smiled and said hey you and got in the car ready to go. she got in and was like "when i come over to your house make sure to give me a hug and a kiss if you want this to go anywhere serious"

she literally said that man... i'm not even kidding.

there were other instances like that. But i feel she was trying to assert full control over me and when i said uh no... lets just be natural and go with the flow that's when distance formed and she began to associate with her ex more. if she told her ex or whatever he is now to cut his fingers off at the first knuckle he would do it without question. I know this because she had him to the point where HE ASKED HER if it was ok to have a drink or a shot.

he'd be like "sweetie is it ok if i have a drink?"

how do i know this? because we all used to hang out and i saw it with my own eyes and ears.

 

[Fvrthebrave]

So after about 3 and a half years my girlfriend broke up with me the other day. She stated her reason as she "wasn't happy". It was really sudden as we just recently visited family in Colorado and also had a great time at Knott's Scary farm the other night.

At first I went about it horribly, I tried to convince her everything was going to be ok, but we have broken up before. About a year ago I dumped her as I believed that I wasn't into her anymore. After about 3 months I basically begged for her back and she came back with little effort. After texting her the other night she sends me this...

"...And I know you don't want to hear it, but the only reason we shouldn't talk, at least for a little while, is so we can begin to not hurt as much and start to move on. I really hate seeing you like this and that's another reason why it would be good not to talk for awhile because I know that every time you talk to me, I end up upsetting you all over again."

I don't disagree with this, this is honestly the most legitimate response I have ever received from a girl when breaking up, but after about 10 minutes with no response from me she sends me this:

"It took you three months to realize you changed your mind. Maybe that's what I need too."

This is the part that confuses me, she basically told me to move on but she might change her mind about breaking up in a few months... obviously I am taking it as BS.



So I am only on Day 2 of NC and it's really rough. The strangest part is, not long after we got back together, after I had dumped her the first time, I was already questioning my decision. She always had a horrible attitude with people in general. Very rude and disrespectful, yet here I am moping around over her. So what could be going on with me? I honestly couldn't even make a list of things I loved about her... she was really just mean most of the time, to the point where she actually needed medicine to keep herself in check. Yet... here I am... feeling like **** and missing basically my best friend.

 

[christoff522]

Starting again, for 60 days

day 1

Okay, I've finally gathered up enough wisdom and balls to go full no contact for the entire 60 days.

I've blocked her in every way I can think of, deleted her number, all texts, blocked her on fb, blocked my access to sites we are connected on. I am full on ghost. I'm not doing this for her but myself. I need to cut the emotional cord.

I'm tired of looking needy and weak, I'm tired of looking at her fb and feeling nauseous because she's posting i love yous to her new bf. I'm a MAN, not a boy, not a little sissy weakling. I need to act like one.

So, here it is, NC BEGINS!!!

From today Tuesday Oct 14 2014 to Dec 13 2014 I will have ZERO contact

 

[fuko2007]

Well Day what ever. I cant really give myself credit as of this point for all my days of NC. So i guess tomorrow even though i have not talked to her will be day one. I did go out of town this weekend to my friends wedding and had a good time. I went and ate at a few places i have not been since i was with that girl. Strange thing is i could eat. Normally i would be all sad and depressed but i was not.

I don't feel as bad as i did when i posted about her birthday. I finally decided to just let go and that cut that ''Impending loss " feeling for me. I would have to say feeling like your on the verge of loss and not knowing was one of the worst things about this. She and i also were trying to take a last trip and have a good time so we could end things on a good note. But i also decided to can that also. It would just prolong the inevitable and my healing.

Its weird i can feel myself changing and my attitude towards how i would normally act and handle this and how i am doing it now is totally different. The old me would be blowing her phone up begging for her not to do this etc. but i feel rather calm about it now. I also am more consistent with my decision to totally end things and im not flip flopping from should i do it or not do as much. Maybe i am farther down the road to recovery than i give myself credit for? or SS is paying off?.

 

[ZTIME]

Here we Go!

So I read through all of these posts and I must say they are quite enlightening. I wanted to share my current story with everyone to see your thoughts.

I dated a Girl for the last 3.5 years. As with all relationships, mine started off great! This girl was attractive, loving, and nice.

After the first four months of us dating, I allowed this girl to move into my house. Here's the kicker', she has 3 children which she had part time custody. (3 days a week). I accepted it as I truly felt that she was "The One". For 2 years things were fine.

After 2 years things started to go down hill. You see, I helped her to get full custody of her 3 children because she said that this was what she wanted. We took these kids and did everything for them. They quickly became straight A students, and got into sports programs. All on my time and my dime. But that's ok!! I thought that she was "The 1".

Her work schedule and mine never really matched up. I have my own company which I run from 10am - 7pm. She works for someone from 8am-5pm. Due to this schedule I was being told that I didn't spend enough time with everyone, and that I didn't make it to the kids events enough, or that I was not involved with her life enough. (Keep in mind that all of these things were fine before she had full custody). So in an effort to compromise I decided to take off from my business every Sunday to spend time with the family and to leave work 1hr. early twice a week to make some of those practices. This worked for 2 months.

After 2 months went by, Nothing I could do was ever good enough. I would constantly get phone calls telling me that I didn't care because I wasn't home early every night. She would go through my cell phone asking me who I was talking to. She would stalk my e-mail and my face book, (often logging in as me since she had the passwords) she would accuse me of cheating and try to embarrass me in front of my friends and employees.

Things were miserable!! My self esteem was as low as it's ever been. I gained weight, I became depressed, I couldn't go to my own home and relax out of fear for the way I would be treated when I got there. Totally horrible.

In September, This girl ignored me for 3 entire days and on the third day texted me that she was moving out because she has tried too hard and things just didn't work out. So I decided to do some snooping......She has been texting another (single dad) that she met at those football practices I couldn't make. She has been e-mailing, and facebook messaging. So I got mad and DRUNK!!

I went home and as she was sleeping in another room other than mine I started texting her about exactly how I felt. I told her that I couldn't believe she would cheat on a guy who was working to support her and her children (As you can imagine, I used a lot of CRAZY language)! She wouldn't respond! so I yelled that if she wanted to move out I'd help her. I went to the closet grabbed all of her hanging clothes and dropped them over the balcony to the front foyer. Then I went to bed.

I woke up the next morning to a girl who told me she doesn't love me and that she just wants to leave and this is the happiest day of her life. I tried to explain my feelings, but that didn't work. I left and wished her luck.

When I got home that evening, I walked into a house with a lot of missing furniture. Beds, tables, bar stools, lamps, wall hangings, desks, and cabinets. Funny thing was she didn't own any of it. She took every towel, every bed sheet and blanket, and anything else she could put in the moving truck she rented. It was insane.

10 minutes after I got home she walked through the door. I said "Wow, you took a lot of my stuff!" She started to cry and replied, "You're leaving me with nothing!, I had to put all of that furniture in storage and leave with 3 kids! You get your house and everything else in it. You're loosing nothing" My response was, "Today I have lost my best friend, my lover, and my family, and yes I consider them my family". he cried and left.

Exactly 1hr. later she calls my cell phone bawling her eyes out saying something along the lines of she doesn't know what she's doing and hangs up.

You're now up to date on the story!

I'm good at not begging, or calling, texting, or e-mailing even if I'm torn up inside. I did break down exactly 2 weeks after the break up and sent a text. the text said "I've lost my lover and my family and today I feel worse then I ever had in my life" she responded with "Pain is temporary, and You're jus afraid of change. Keep your head up and you'll be fine. I'm always here as a friend if you need me." She further stated that she has lost all love for me and that she wants me to have closure with no pain but things just didn't work.

So I'm now past my first week of NC after that text. It's been 3 weeks that I have not seen this girl. I'm pretty sure that she is now living with the guy from the football field and her 3 children. (5 kids total). She has gone to friends and family and said horrible things about me. (when she left I had to shut down our shared account which she left -$1000. She told everyone she deposited a check into that account and I shut it down leaving her with no money...CRAZY!)

I'm doing this NC for myself, with no hope of trying to win her back. My confused emotions have run the scenario of her coming back, but to be honest I'm not in a good place with myself to even make a rational decision.

I'm good with doing 60 days of NC and revisiting the situation then

Reply how you like folks!! I could use the feedback.

 

[fuko2007]

Ok so just found this out via word of mouth. I had asked that girl a month ago is she wanted to go to this concert with me that was where I was this weekend. She kept giving excuses and everything but turns out she went anyway . I'm so angry right now. I can't even sleep guys .

 

[Noyou]

Ex's friend faved my online profile.

WELP here we go lol

 

[European-DJ]

Day 0

I keep wondering when this will end, i keep getting back to this because of the same girl... 3 years have passed since the start of our first relationship, enough should be enough, but it seems like i never learn.

We stay together each time for 6 months, and then one of us ****'s it up, either it is me, or it is her; this time it is both.

It is a poisonous relationship, the only reason for being in it, and the only reason for staying with her is due to the "artificial - We know each other so well BS", and the amazing sex we have - point blank.

Go **** 10 other girls does not work, neither does spinning plate; i simply have no idea what to do, in order to get passed this girl....

This time, it is not just the usual sadness/ignoring, this time i am feeling somewhat near depression, and this time i have to think of a bullet prof plan in order to stay as far away from this girl, as possible...
- hopefully, this time i can manage to stay away from her, after all, i am 22 years old, i cannot waste anymore time on this girl, the relationship will never last, and it will always be dominated by the lack of trust and lack of "love"... "love" being the initial honeymoon phase of all relationships, before they turn sour.


Well.. Day 0 for me, as i have been in contact with her, tomorow, day 1 starts; wish me luck guys!

 

[European-DJ]

maybe try no contact this time. I know this is the girl that cheated on you like a million times

Yeah... it is,

But it seems like i simple cannot let this one go, i have been seeing loads of other girls, quite a few, only one caught my attention for real, but it just didn't stick, i kept gravitating towards this girl that does me no good...

It is so weird.

 

[cfdagola]

Yeah... it is,

But it seems like i simple cannot let this one go, i have been seeing loads of other girls, quite a few, only one caught my attention for real, but it just didn't stick, i kept gravitating towards this girl that does me no good...

It is so weird.

thing is, is she knows she's got you by the balls.

you will come back no matter what she does. hands down. why should she change her ways? at this point its become a formality.

You need to break the chain's that bind you and show this girl that she can't treat you this way anymore. screw that mess.

I to am having some issues maintaining total no contact. although no ACTUAL contact has been made my ex has been relentless with her social media barrage on me. liking pictures, making jealous comments against any female that post on my instagram. sprinkling little tidbits to the right people letting me know she misses me. posting random love and i miss you quotes all over her pinterest.

its been 8 days so far. but it feels like a month. I want to talk to her so bad and the thing is. i know she's waiting for it to happen. but screw that this chick picked her lame ex over me. that's all i need to keep reminding myself of.

 

[jimmy18]

thing is, is she knows she's got you by the balls.

you will come back no matter what she does. hands down. why should she change her ways? at this point its become a formality.

You need to break the chain's that bind you and show this girl that she can't treat you this way anymore. screw that mess.

I to am having some issues maintaining total no contact. although no ACTUAL contact has been made my ex has been relentless with her social media barrage on me. liking pictures, making jealous comments against any female that post on my instagram. sprinkling little tidbits to the right people letting me know she misses me. posting random love and i miss you quotes all over her pinterest.

its been 8 days so far. but it feels like a month. I want to talk to her so bad and the thing is. i know she's waiting for it to happen. but screw that this chick picked her lame ex over me. that's all i need to keep reminding myself of.

Right now she is no doubt dominating your thoughts, but since she doesn't know that (as you aren't contacting her), you hold the power.

Keep it that way forever by never contacting her again!

 

[YeeZus]

I just feel so Fuc#ed today. I checked her FB profile today and she is happily hugging and kissing her fiance. Feeling like sh!t. I shouldn't have done the stalking but couldn't control myself. I'm getting this abnormal heart beating and heavy breathing man. Feels like I am going into depression :|