LearningSlowly
Master Don Juan
Im going to get a new passport in the morning, but yeah you definitely can. Gotta think about what to tell my parents. I'll talk to you on facebook.
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Yeah Josh recommended something along the lines of referring to my car as the "sexmobile", but I'll describe that more in a little bit.Jack Wealthy said:I used to hate your texting, now I don't mind it. I still don't like it. It just seems corny, like you're texting her while pulling the troll face or something. But the actual direction you text is good, you're a bit too easy to get but that's a problem I only just got over. I would reccomend less sexualisation of them (less compliments, cutie, I was thinkin about you, etc.) and more sexualization of yourself and the scenario. Like "this beach we're going to is sexy." or more likely something about you to interacting, over texting you can be ultra confronting like that and say stuff that would normally be forward.
Also, nice to read something new man. Push it.
Jelly of meeting up with Josh![]()
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
Which girl? HB Destiny?Jack Wealthy said:About the one before that one: Take steps back, give her room, then come back in.
Thanks man, nice to hear from you for onceMindgamez said:Well done BPH. Man it sucks for you guys for loosing your targets at the party. BPH, I like how you stepped back from Grace and told Learning about the situation. I would've done the same for my bro.
About the mall when you had a terrible reaction, did you tell her about her behavior?
Too bad obhe was shyer than you guys. I'm around this level myself and I'm still taking small steps.
It's great to have a friend from the forum with you so you can analyse what you did and think about what you've done right or wrong. You seem like a cool dude BPH![]()
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Write about it? Start a journal bro.ohbe said:Had a great time with you guysGlad the forums are back up.
Hmm. Just the fact that its a facebook message makes me not too happy about this one. But hey, I got my only LTR by messaging her on facebook. I was kinda goofy though, plowed through any creepiness and sent her a video of a chimp on a segway and just kept talking.BPH said:After that I just walk away and everything's fine. Then later on Facebook I find her and decide to message here, and here's how that went:
Me: Hey are you that girl I met at work today?
Her: yeah!
Me: I don't want this to be weird but you are really sexy, are you free this saturday?
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Don't. If she won't reply to a facebook message, she definitely won't give you her number.BPH said:Might chill with HB Carla this weekend. I don't have work this weekend so I won't be seeing HB Alex. By the way, she has not replied to my Facebook message. I'm thinking about either waiting another week until I see her, or just messaging her again to give me her number.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.