"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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The Bruce Wayne/Batman Method

Fatal Jay

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Was at church service today, my ex gf goes there also, we haven't talked in months. She did the fade away method on me. Instead of the afc move talking to her during church services, I ignore her and leave church as soon as service is over (usually after church, everyone stand and talk). I have lost 30 more pounds since we been dating. Whenever I am there people flock around me and talk to me and I can feel her eyes on me the whole time, I said one word to her today at church during service which was "hey" and continue talking to other people during meet and greet time.

I call this the batman method because, whenever I'm around her presence I do what I need to do, and I am gone, no trying to see what she been up to or anything. I apply this with all women in my life, I do what I need to do with them and then I'm gone, that's what women loved about bruce wayne/batman they don't know what he is doing in his life, they just see what he does, and then he is gone, and I believe women love that, for the fact that so many thoughts are bouncing around in their brain about this man. Things like "who is he dating" "why is he not paying attention to me" " where is he going, is he going to see a girl"?

The bruce wayne/batman method.


Fatal
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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betheman

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I dont understand this, you usually talk and people flock around = good!
she shows and you piss off??? you're kicking yourself in the balls here surely?
the bette rmove is to continue to have thme flock around you but keeping a 'polite' distance between you and the ex.
maybe I read it wrong?
 

yyc12

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This is the typical way men deal with breakups. Can someone explain why women see this as being hostile towards them or even immature? I don't see how doing what you need to do for yourself as anything wrong.
 

Fatal Jay

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betheman said:
I dont understand this, you usually talk and people flock around = good!
she shows and you piss off??? you're kicking yourself in the balls here surely?
the bette rmove is to continue to have thme flock around you but keeping a 'polite' distance between you and the ex.
maybe I read it wrong?

that's exactly what I do, maybe I didn't speak enough on the meet and greet part of the service is when people flock around me, and I keep a polite distance to her, but today she happened to be right behind me, my seat was behind me, so when I turned around she was there. So I said hey and continued to talk to others.

yyc12 said:
This is the typical way men deal with breakups. Can someone explain why women see this as being hostile towards them or even immature? I don't see how doing what you need to do for yourself as anything wrong.
Women think this is hostile or immature, because your not feeding her ego, you not doing what males in her past have done.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Fatal Jay

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Exactly because if you 100 percent ignore her, that lets her know she got to you.
 
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