"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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texting girl

pyros

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Hi.


I met this girl at my ballroom lessons. We danced together for a bit, and at the end of the class, we just talked for 8-10 minutes because she was in a bit of a hurry. I asked for her number but since she's a foreign student, she said she did not know it. So I suggested to add her in facebook, she agreeded and gave me her full name.

Now, I did not add her as a friend in FB because it kills all the mystery, so I just sent her a FB message two days later suggesting we go out to grab a drink.

Im thinking that it might have been better if I had talked to her a bit more, or on another occasion and then ask for a date (since we just briefly talked, but the mood was good).


Suggestions? Could I have done better?


Thanks.
:cheer:
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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bigneil

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If a woman claims her phone number is not stored in Arabic Numerals, it's safe to say she is not interested.

Here's another bad sign:

"What is your number?"
"I forget."
 

pyros

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Hi.

I mean, the girl is from Sweeden, but shes in my country styuding, so I asked for her number here, but she has not memorized it. I think that is pretty normal.
 

switch

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^for guys:normal
for girls:no
but still there could be the chance that she didnt know her number...if she was interested she would say something like:
"ok let me get my phone and give you a miss call" or something like that...
anyway wait and see how she replies to your message
 

Ringleader41

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Just because the girl is from Sweden doesn't mean she's mentally retarded. Sweden is a first world country you know.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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izza

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I'm going to suggest something radical, namely that if you build a genuine connection with a lady, she might even just tell the truth.

Anyway, what you did sounds fine. Omg, "keep the mystery" you're trying too hard. Sounds like you're focused on results rather than making your dreams come alive. Instead of asking "does this maintain mystery" I suggest asking "do I genuinely want to friend her on fb?"

A lot of guys are so desperate they don't genuinely do what they want. They end up trying too hard and not doing what they truly want.

Izza
 

Pimp-sicle

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Im thinking that it might have been better if I had talked to her a bit more, or on another occasion and then ask for a date (since we just briefly talked, but the mood was good).
Why do you feel this way? Did she respond to your FB message yet?

To answer that question about it really depends. If you create attraction quickly and the girl is receptive, then asking her out then and there will work well.

However what I like to do, esp when I KNOW I will be seeing the girl regularly wherever it is...... is to create tons of attraction, be seen as the outgoing fun guy in the group and then NOT ask her out. I know, I can feel everyone on the board being like "whaaaaaa!" In my experience this create tons of attraction, value and when the girl see's you chatting with other girls and having a great time she will be more intrigued.

If she doesn't respond to your FB message don't bring it up. Just continue flirting with her in the dance class, then periodically pulling away your attention and once you feel she's showing more interest ask her out again. Instead of doing it over FB, I'd do right there in person so you can read her body language and get a better gauge of her interest.







PIMP
 
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