Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Talks Wayy Too Much...

amnbyrd

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Alright so I was helping my friend study when he logs on his and his wifes myspace, I noticed this girl on their friendslist and said she was hot. To sum things up he told his wife who is friends with her and she got my number and we've been talking. I dont have a myspace so I emailed her pics. Started talking yesterday and today I met her while she was on break at work. Anyways she says Im cute and theres def signs of interest but the main problem here is she talks wayy too much. I mean she'll just go on and on and wont even let me get a few words in. I just got of the phone with her-after 3 hrs-(I know bad thing to do) I told her I had to get some sleep. ANyways this girl is a virgin and seems to be an overall good girl though whos been in too many relationships with guys just trying to get her in bed. She pretty much told me about all and I mean all her past relationships. Anyways just venting here-trying to decide if I wanna persue anything with this girl-any input on the talking too much or anything else?
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Sir I

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amnbyrd said:
Alright so I was helping my friend study when he logs on his and his wifes myspace, I noticed this girl on their friendslist and said she was hot. To sum things up he told his wife who is friends with her and she got my number and we've been talking. I dont have a myspace so I emailed her pics. Started talking yesterday and today I met her while she was on break at work. Anyways she says Im cute and theres def signs of interest but the main problem here is she talks wayy too much. I mean she'll just go on and on and wont even let me get a few words in. I just got of the phone with her-after 3 hrs-(I know bad thing to do) I told her I had to get some sleep. ANyways this girl is a virgin and seems to be an overall good girl though whos been in too many relationships with guys just trying to get her in bed. She pretty much told me about all and I mean all her past relationships. Anyways just venting here-trying to decide if I wanna persue anything with this girl-any input on the talking too much or anything else?

three hours on a phone???? and you say know a bad thing to do? clearly not, by staying on the phone for 3 hours you just shown that you have way to much time on your hand. allways get down to seeing someone in person have a drink somewhere, if she then sill keeps talking on and on and on.. than you either change the subject or you bail
 

MacAvoy

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I'm not even going to help you because I know your not going to do what we say. Your post screams "I want to go to AFC'ville, can you help me get there"
 

Mavrick

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I dated a girl once who was so boring. We would sit there, and I would talk, and it was like I was talking to a brick wall. I guess you could be thankful she has something to say.

You need to control the frame though, dude. Once you tell her you have to go, then go. Don't stay on the phone with any chick more than TEN minutes. If she wants to talk, it should be face to face. Also, the more information you give her about yourself over the phone, the less interesting you'll be when you meet her.
 

DJDamage

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amnbyrd said:
ANyways this girl is a virgin and seems to be an overall good girl though whos been in too many relationships with guys just trying to get her in bed.
What you just said here doesn't add up.

How can she still be a virgin if she has been in so many relationships?! I doubt she is telling the truth.

aren't you trying to get her in bed too?! because if you aren't then there is something wrong with you too.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Faded Image

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When a girl tells you about her past relationships and you're just meeting her, you're purchasing a one way ticket to the friend zone.

How old is this girl?
 

MotownMack

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When a girl tells you about her past relationships and you're just meeting her, you're purchasing a one way ticket to the friend zone.
Meh, some conversation along these lines is pretty normal and expected, and I would even argue a little necessary for a girl to feel like you know her. But this sounds overboard.


Anyway, back to your question-I can't deal with that either, dude. And talking non-stop usually goes hand in hand with stories about people you don't know and may never meet, depressing stories, drama involving girls who've done her wrong.. blech....

No thanks.
 

The Deacon

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It depends on what you want, and what boundaries you want to set. You can definitely get a date with this chick, but she's probably going to be a blabbermouth and totally not-fun to be with. I hate blabbermouths. If you want to bed her, just be prepared to look yourself in the mirror and discover that you are another one of those jerks trying to get her into bed. If you just want a celibate relationship, then go for it.

She talked to you for 3 hours? And told you about her past relationships? She's probably got baggage man, and the fact that she's willing to share it with you so quickly means that she is probably really insecure about the way she feels about herself...
 

dannyegg4575

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Don't over analyze everything. Maybe she's nervous, maybe she is a little chatty in trying to open you up, maybe she wants you to approve her. Whatever the reason, take your time because you are given the rejection card. Take it.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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amnbyrd

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Yea Im def gonna tak back control of the situation. I'd hate to mess this up. Guess I'll just see how things go.
One more question-I know most say a lot of txting if bad so what do you do when the girl txts a lot about everyday stuff like school or justa bout anything else?
 

dannyegg4575

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when it does happen, let her. let her wonder where you are and what you're doing.
 

amnbyrd

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ARe you saying just dont reply at all? How does that usually work out? In a good way or do girls get mad if you dont reply?
 

dannyegg4575

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no, im' not saying that. I'm saying do your own things. You're a busy guy aren't you? let her think about you. let her say "wtf??? this is the first guy who didn't reply to me so fast!" get it?

and who gives a f<ck if she's mad? You're busy doing more important things.
 

Mavrick

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amnbyrd said:
ARe you saying just dont reply at all? How does that usually work out? In a good way or do girls get mad if you dont reply?
Dude, girls love guys who don't care as much as them. It gives them something to prove to themselves.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

Read more...

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