Someone Please Kick My Ass

[onemorerobot]

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHH!!! I am a freakin jackass. I finally have the perfect moment to ask for this girl's phone number and I **bleep**ing blew it. I'm so pissed at myself right now. Why God? Why do I **bleep** balls so much? She obviously likes me, so why can't I get up the nerve to just ask her??? I need a swift kick to the face and balls. Who's first in line?

 

[Quiksilver]

But...

You don't have any!

 

[onyx]

rejection is better than regret...always rememeber that ****

 

[Gubby]

Hahaha, man, you care too much. Kicking yourself about won't help. This may be asking for too much.. but you should try thinking of this sh'it as a little less important.

OH NOES I DIDN'T GET LAID. I bit like those last 18x365 days huh? Funny how you've survived that long! EVERYONE knows that more than a fortnight without getting a girl is usually fatal to males!

Do you have a hobby? Possibly a career or school?

Girls define themselves by how well they can attract the opposite sex. Men have bigger fish to fry.

 

[onemorerobot]

This has nothing to do with getting laid. I'm not looking to simply bang this girl.

 

[donjuanjovi]

Stop thinking of all the horrible thing that probably arn't going to happen, and think of the positive things that will come of this if you ask her! Just as quiksilver's sig says "You miss 100% of the shots you don't take"
What if hockey players never shot at the net for the fear they may miss and be made fun of by their team mates for a crappy shot?

Just Do It!

 

[Gubby]

This has nothing to do with getting laid. I'm not looking to simply bang this girl.

My advice still goes. Replace get laid with "have a super meaningful relationship".

Seriously, you can't muster the balls to do it because you are taking it WAY TOO SERIOUSLY. What's she gonna do? Punch you?

The only remedy for taking oneself too seriously is to laugh at yourself. Go on. Laugh. Don't you look dumb? Think of how ridiculous it all is. Whatever you want to do to this girl it can't be soooo much better than anything else that ever happened to you. You have a favourite restaurant? You like eating there? Do you ever get totally nervous when you're about to go to this restaurant? What if the food takes too long to come? Maybe there could be some accident and the restaurant's closed? WHAT IF THE RESTURANT BURNED DOWN?!

Come on, slap yourself in the face, you know you want to.

 

[onemorerobot]

haha, point taken.

 

[donjuanjovi]

What's she gonna do? Punch you?

:box:

:crackup: :crackup: :crackup:

 

[Distant Light]

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHH!!! I am a freakin jackass. I finally have the perfect moment to ask for this girl's phone number and I **bleep**ing blew it. I'm so pissed at myself right now. Why God? Why do I **bleep** balls so much? She obviously likes me, so why can't I get up the nerve to just ask her??? I need a swift kick to the face and balls. Who's first in line?

It's not that much of a big deal getting a number doesn't guarantee nothing but if you will never see her again you should've went for a number.