"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Some things I have been pondering on for awhile now...

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BenPW-DJNewbie

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Firstly, I realised being popular isn't everything, so I am over that. But..how can I be really respected, and wanted by my friends, and girls.

Another question, how, just by a girl looking, can I make them notice me and not just see me as 'another person in the crowd'? I don't want to be a person who just blends in.:(
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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NINJA PIMP

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1. You need to respect yourself before you can expect that from other people. You sound very insecure and nobody respects a sensitive wimp.

2. You shouldn't have to do anything to make a girl notice you. Don't fall into the PUA trap of wearing ridiculous gear or performing like a monkey for attention.

Definitely take care of yourself and look your best, but realize that is still only a small part of one's presence. You need to exude the right kind of energy and charisma to really stand out. The only way you do this is to be as uninhibited and fun to be around as possible.
 
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BenPW-DJNewbie

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One more thing?

I'm not insecure and needy, I dont give a fvck what anyone thinks of me and I always stand up for myself and not in a vain way, but I love myself, and I'm always imrproving myself.
I have an important couple of questions now.

firstly, how do I be fun, charismatic, great person to be around? some examples please?

secondly, is talking alot less a better thing and should I be a bit quieter? I talk quite abit? Just wondering...
 

Interceptor

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firstly, how do I be fun, charismatic, great person to be around? some examples please?

A "fun" person is usually one who has a humorous view on things. He is social, friendly, engages people in conversations, and alwasy has something witty to say.
He is adventurous, and takes a positive spin on life and its circumstances.

A "Charismatic" person is one who knows how to display their inner personality. One who knows how to smile, stand, exude confidence and self assuredness. He has a flair for expression, verbal and non verbal. He has a certain skill or trait that stands out, which makes others drawn to him for his excellence in it.

A "great person" to be around is one who always lends a helping hand to friends, is non judgemental and non critical. He lets others be themselves, and encourages them to greatness and free expression. He compliments people genuinely and has no hidden agenda. he is a true friendly companion. He gives advice when asked, and has comapssion for others when they make mistakes. He has patience and always smiles easily.




secondly, is talking alot less a better thing and should I be a bit quieter? I talk quite abit? Just wondering...


Talking in measured sentences is the best. Say what you have to say, and say no more.
Don't feel like you have to have a say in everything. Do not feel the need to have to voice your opinion to everyone on everything.
Wghen you do speak, be aware of your voice tone, speak deeply, and and witrh conviction in what you have to say...otherwise shut up.
DO not cut off other people when they're talking. Do not try to be louder than others so you can be "heard". Just express your opinion when it's necessary. Otherwise you will come across as insecure, and needing approval and attention from others.
 
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BenPW-DJNewbie

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Much thanks for your answer, Interceptor. If you have any form of IM, maybe we could talk abit more about this? If not, ah well. Cheers again. :)

Ben
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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