If you only want her as a friend, it shouldn't matter. Besides, you can never know if she ACTUALLY likes you unless she outright says she does or starts doing things like kissing you.Vypros said:You're social experiment is causing her to like you.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
If you only want her as a friend, it shouldn't matter. Besides, you can never know if she ACTUALLY likes you unless she outright says she does or starts doing things like kissing you.Vypros said:You're social experiment is causing her to like you.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Actually it DOES matter, because if the girl is starting to like him and he's just playing around with an experiment he is going to HURT her.jaymo said:If you only want her as a friend, it shouldn't matter.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
This is a good experiment but what I don't hear about you doing is going out and constantly meeting new women. I'm not trying to bring you down here because your experiment is great as far as having a friend goes but expanding your social circle will expand your inner-world too (Scientifically proven). Ie. The brain creates new maps and connections and expands based on your external world also.Jayer said:MacAvoy
you may be right. But does it matter as long as I'm the one in control?
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Jayer said:I see this girl as only a friend
I have to agree. You post something new like after MONTHS. If you were really friends, you'd see her more than once every few months. This is a back burner relationship, nothing close to friendship.MacAvoy said:Sounds like your not good enough friends with her to get any benefits. It doesn't sound like your even in the friends zone, your in the semi-interested but he keeps sluffing me off, so I'll keep him on the backburner as a backup in case he ever smartens up kinda thing.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.