Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

So my son is getting married...

Status
Not open for further replies.

Wyldfire

Banned
Joined
Oct 25, 2001
Messages
9,111
Reaction score
28
He and his girlfriend stopped by today to inform me that they are going to have a baby. He's 18 and she is 17. She's a nice girl and I like her. I've raised my son to take responsibility for his choices and/or mistakes and that is what he's doing. I would have preferred that he wait for marriage, but under the circumstances I'm proud of him for standing up and being a man instead of running away like a lot of guys would do. Her mother offered to give them an out and said if they didn't feel they could deal with this that she would adopt the baby and they could still be as involved as they wanted to be. My son didn't want that...he wants to do what he feels is right. He and his girlfriend love each other and and based on what I see from them they encourage each other to follow their goals and dreams.

Where I live, it's very common for couples to get married very young, and oddly enough, they do quite well. There is less divorce here than you see nationally and people stay together far more often. I actually think this will be positive for my son because he's been sort of unmotivated to do much of anything, but all of a sudden he is very motivated to make some positive changes that will serve him well. He seems very excited about becoming a father. If getting married and having a child inspires him in a positive way then I suppose I can live with becoming a Grandma.
 

ryannath

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 10, 2006
Messages
717
Reaction score
3
So where exactly do you live? Must not be the states because divorce rates are high in every state.
 

sparky0000

Banned
Joined
Apr 27, 2006
Messages
669
Reaction score
4
he is an american. scary that you would think he wouldn't be. american teen girls don't know how to keep their chubby legs closed. just a fact (check the stats).

the divorce rate among teen couples is freaking high. the greater the age disparity between the couple the lower the divorce rate (for the most part). a mature man is coveted in much of the world for this reason.
 

Wyldfire

Banned
Joined
Oct 25, 2001
Messages
9,111
Reaction score
28
ryannath said:
So where exactly do you live? Must not be the states because divorce rates are high in every state.
We live in Maine...one big town and everything else is pretty rural. It's where I grew up and marriages do have a higher success rate here...even those who marry fairly young. The economy sort of demands it as it's really hard to do well when you are single. This area is always about 20 years or more behind the rest of the country, too...much more conservative and traditional.
 

Wyldfire

Banned
Joined
Oct 25, 2001
Messages
9,111
Reaction score
28
sparky0000 said:
he is an american. scary that you would think he wouldn't be. american teen girls don't know how to keep their chubby legs closed. just a fact (check the stats).

the divorce rate among teen couples is freaking high. the greater the age disparity between the couple the lower the divorce rate (for the most part). a mature man is coveted in much of the world for this reason.
I'm 41 and there are quite a few high school sweetheart couples I went to school with who got married right out of high school who are still married almost 25 years later. The area is a bit different than most places in the US.

I'll check this thread a little later...I have a Sociology Final tomorrow and I want to shoot for a perfect score on it.

I know a lot of people here are against marriage and would advise him to pressure her to get an abortion. He doesn't want that. He wants this baby and wants to get married. No one pressured him...it was his idea. I also have raised all of my kids not to buy into feminist messages, especially my sons...and to never feel guilty for being male. I've stuck up for them in school when things were unfair for them as boys as well. So he's not being taken advantage of and he is aware of how unpleasant divorce and all that can be. So I'd appreciate it no one posted telling me to "make" him change his mind. I'm going to support his decision and be there for him as best I can and any input about how to best do that would be most appreciated. I'm naturally good at being supportive, but someone here might have ideas that I haven't thought of, so those kinds of responses are quite welcome! Thanks guys...
 

wayword

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 13, 2006
Messages
1,482
Reaction score
21
Location
BFE
Wyldfire said:
He and his girlfriend stopped by today to inform me that they are going to have a baby. He's 18 and she is 17.
Lmao...you really think this is going to work out? :crackup:

Er, congrats, granny! :crazy:

Too bad he doesn't have a strong father presence in the house to lay law down and set his ass straight. Too late now. And I hope you guys don't apply for welfare or any social programs cuz I don't want my tax dollars paying for your irresponsibility.

Get real here - you know damn well 18 is too young for an LTR...much less baby & marriage. Again, your female mind is too weak not to just say FVCK NO, KIDDO!
 

THE_ADDMAN

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 27, 2005
Messages
821
Reaction score
4
Age
37
Location
Newmarket, Ontario
Congratulations on ur son's getting married. :)

may it be long and fulfilling for him and his fiancee
 

DJDamage

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 6, 2004
Messages
5,666
Reaction score
103
Location
Canada
Wyldfire said:
I'm proud of him for standing up and being a man instead of running away like a lot of guys would do.
Sounds to me like he is still a naive boy. Just out of highschool with no real direction or prospect's, getting a high school girlfriend pregnant without being careful and using a condom.

Wyldfire said:
I know a lot of people here are against marriage and would advise him to pressure her to get an abortion. He doesn't want that. He wants this baby and wants to get married.
You make assumptions about people "on here" most members on here are against bad marriages and usually what leads to a bad marriage is a bad start. A guy that has yet to find himself right out of highschool should not and is not ready mentally to be a father or a husband.
 

SamoJednom

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 12, 2007
Messages
124
Reaction score
0
Congrats Wyld,

In my country about 10 yrs ago it was unheard of to get divorced .... Pretty much you marry and stay together forever...

But when my family moved here people from my country started to divorce left and right me being in USA of course lol.

O and Wyld, study up on proper baby care, diapers and what not :D
 

ValleyDJing

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 15, 2006
Messages
1,533
Reaction score
14
Location
California
:up:

My mom would probably disown me if I told her I got some chick pregnant right now. Props moms.
 

SamoJednom

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 12, 2007
Messages
124
Reaction score
0
Hot damn didn't know Wyld was a woman. My apologies Wyld, went in to "harass" a troll thinking you were a guy.

-SamoJednom
 

ValleyDJing

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 15, 2006
Messages
1,533
Reaction score
14
Location
California
skip_to my lou 781 said:
how old are you man? its creepy a dude that old is on here. stay out of the high school forum!
You're stupid! Leave.
 

Wyldfire

Banned
Joined
Oct 25, 2001
Messages
9,111
Reaction score
28
First off...I'm a woman, not a dude...but I'd actually rather be treated like any other "dude" on here.

wayword...a big part of the reason my son feels it is so important for him to stand by his girlfriend and be a responsible father is because his father is a lousy Dad. And he does have strong male role models in his life. He has three uncles who are married to my three sisters...all of them married at least 20 years, fathers and good, responsible men. I've also done a very good job instilling good values in my children. They were using birth control, actually. Sometimes it doesn't work...and my 6 year old is proof of that as well.

My son really isn't ready for this, but no one really is...however, he's determined to try his best and be responsible...and no matter what happens I am very proud of him for behaving like a MAN and not a boy.

And thanks to those who offered congratulations. I'm concerned about the situation, yes...but I feel I've done a good job raising my children and I think he'll be a wonderful father.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 10, 2003
Messages
15,515
Reaction score
62
Location
Galt's Gulch
Wyldfire said:
...My son really isn't ready for this....
I suggest that they attend a few premarital counseling sessions.
 

CLOONEY

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 11, 2002
Messages
3,021
Reaction score
5
Congrats Wild.

If its different in your area of the world, then go for it. Cultures change both nationally, and within countries (as in your case).

As for the statistics of marriage, these are some signs of chances at a successful marriage:

Courted more than 6 months.
Both over 21.
Have many mutual friends of both sexes.
Both desire children (in this case, looks like it is so).
Similar level of education.
Both religeous.
Parents and friends heartily approve of the marriage.
Both free of sex hang-ups.
Income will be enough to live on without outside help.
Broken up temporarily 2 times or less.
Both partners close to each of their parents.
Both popular among peers during youth.
Both get along with their intended mother\father in-laws.
Both showed obedience toward significant adults, such as parents, relatives and teachers.

7 or more of these correct, and you have an average chance at a healthy marriage. The higher, obviously, the better the chance.

This comes from a phsycology book. So take it as you will.

But Wild, congrats again, will be fun being a nan, especially though now that you can play with your grandchild and not have the ultimate responsibility and you will be young enough to enjoy them with high levels of energy (we all know that is needed)!!
 

sparky0000

Banned
Joined
Apr 27, 2006
Messages
669
Reaction score
4
can somebody please cue the banjo music.

one nice thing about this is that mobile homes have come a long way in the past 20 years. not as many flats as they once had.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top