Dante420
Master Don Juan
Now that my social proof is gone, I have no friends to bring people around with. I'll prolly sound desperate anytime people wanna make plans, what to do now?
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
So I Lost My Friends, How Am I Suppose to DJ Now?
- Thread starter Dante420
- Start date
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Tyson420
Senior Don Juan
uhhh How did you manage to do that?
Dante420
Master Don Juan
Tyson420 said:uhhh How did you manage to do that?
Me and my best friend kinda lead our clique, we don't normally hang out with the rest so it was normally just me and him chillin with the girls and we'd meet up with the others for blazing and other stuff we did, but he had more rapport with them.
Me and him ended up not friends and as a result me and the rest aren't friends, so now I am going to have to work on building a new circle before I move across the country a few months from now.
Since your moving anyway... concentrate on getting in the gym, getting some new clothes and getting some money in your pocket. Worry about a new social circle when you get there. Make this a mission and stay committed.
Dante420
Master Don Juan
Thank you sirWarrior74 said:Since your moving anyway... concentrate on getting in the gym, getting some new clothes and getting some money in your pocket. Worry about a new social circle when you get there. Make this a mission and stay committed.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
moneyisking
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Sep 8, 2009
- Messages
- 626
- Reaction score
- 11
same thing happened, although i didn't un-friend my friend, he simply had to drop out from one semester to get some unfinished business done, but he's coming back next sem, so we gona blast the f-ck out of this city.
BTW, about your situation, I kind of had to make new friends again after my friend left for a while, b/c i really never hung out with others than him and his buddies and some of my buddies, but it was mostly me and him. I learned a lot thanks to his absence. Mainly don't get bogged down making friends. Just be cool, a man, and have fun. Don't be a serious dumb azz. Then they will mostly think you're cool. One big thing I learned is that you must act, not react. Meaning go say hello to him and her first in parties. It's simple as "hey I don't think I got to know you, whats your name?". and then just be HAPPY and FUN you. I learned a lot from absence of my friend, and now, I have a lot of friends, find parties somehow, and get to know more friends. Hope you do well too
BTW, about your situation, I kind of had to make new friends again after my friend left for a while, b/c i really never hung out with others than him and his buddies and some of my buddies, but it was mostly me and him. I learned a lot thanks to his absence. Mainly don't get bogged down making friends. Just be cool, a man, and have fun. Don't be a serious dumb azz. Then they will mostly think you're cool. One big thing I learned is that you must act, not react. Meaning go say hello to him and her first in parties. It's simple as "hey I don't think I got to know you, whats your name?". and then just be HAPPY and FUN you. I learned a lot from absence of my friend, and now, I have a lot of friends, find parties somehow, and get to know more friends. Hope you do well too
sageproduct
Banned
Kinda similar situation for me, but I'm losing my friends by choice...they're AFC, mostly douches, and the girls in the group are ugly prude btiches, except for one who is hot and whips all my guy friends...annoying as fck. Kinda hard to just jump into another group tho.
I usually don't like this guy but his advice here is golden. There's a saying; The best friend you can have is money. Get some money saved up. Buy some nice things. Go get in the gym. People will talk to you and you will be okay. People are drawn to strength, not weakness.Warrior74 said:Since your moving anyway... concentrate on getting in the gym, getting some new clothes and getting some money in your pocket. Worry about a new social circle when you get there. Make this a mission and stay committed.