So I just got my heart ripped to shreds...

[QuadDeuces]

Go pound the benchpress, rip apart the squat rack, pick up your helmet and get back in the field!

 

[lizardking82]

Been there, done that. Do not avoid the pain you're feeling, to begin with. Live through it.

Second of all, she was being the tampon to your emotional weaknesses. She left now so there is no tampon anymore and your wounds ache. This is merely the fact she left. The fact she left might bruise your ego a bit and since you got used to her somehow, breaking an habit is sometimes painful, too. But do not mistake this one. Look inside yourself. What is worrying you? Probably got childhood issues left unresolved, of the kinds you would laugh if someone told you, but they are there. We all have them, I think.

Second of all, if you don't wanna date for some time, fine. Do not date. Do not force it. When you feel like dating again, go for it. Do not force it now in a desperate attempt to make yourself feel better. Hit rock bottom, than use the girls (among other things) to gain self confidence. Good luck

 

[Reykhel]

This is perspective. The girl is a nobody.

Valuable so much as in a brief footnote in your story.

"Chin up. There are plenty more fish in the sea". Boring, but completely right. It's a scarcity issue.

You are the value. Women are so replaceable that it's absurd

You've merely lost perspective. You'll gain it back soon enough.

Terrible advice, Davey boy.

Endorsing that he get back in the field asap shows you don't understand where the guy is coming from and shows
a real lack of world experience and understanding. I'm surprised you didn't send a link from Chateau Heartiste to back up what you're saying...
Clearly your experience comes from reading blogs and banging on your keyboard......and following the other mgtow extremist like his
little lap dog endorsing everything he says.....oh wait......

The guy has just wrote a thread entitled "So I just got my heart ripped to shreds...", so he's obviously emotionally fragile right now....going
right back out an gaming is probably not the best solution for him right now.

I know Davey boy (erroneously ) believes he's giving value......but he's wrong. Why? Value is like currency. People view value in different ways according to their needs and wants. It's like if Davey took his English pounds and went to France (hypothetically speaking, if he were ever to travel outside of his village. Imagine) and he tried to use his English pounds. To him the English pounds are valuable, but to the French they are worthless. The value they want are Euros....

...just like when he gives advice based on his sexual strategy and paradigm of the world. To him it seems valuable....for normal fully functioning people it's worthless. (for example people who work don't have the time to stand outside their local supermarket eating a sandwich and approaching a hot woman every 2 minutes............whether that's real or make believe is beside the point)

 

[Reykhel]

Wow....this guy must have me on speed dial or something..........never seen anyone on this forum respond so
quickly as this puppy. Must have several alerts or something.....

I could have sworn that he said he had me on ignore.........but yet he still responds. Just like he says he has @9Volt on ignore....but
chases him around the forums, needing to get the last word in and always telling him "haha I have you on ignore...."

Seems what this poster says and what he does are two different things.

Someone like that must be taken with a grain of salt. Their word is suspect.

Impresionable young men that take this walter mitty serious, think again.

 

[Reykhel]

Is this thread about @Konada 's problems, or yours?

Am I on ignore or not........

He keeps saying I am.......yet he keeps responding to me.......

Is this website about Davey pushing his paradigm or is it about catering to the needs and personal development of a variety of different men from a variety of different cultures and experience?

For the good of @Konada and for the impressionable young men on the website, fraudulent currency must be pointed out. If it wasn't so fraudulent and Davey really believed in his own value, he would not get so bothered when his "advice" or authenticity of his "advice" is pointed out....

Again, the op has stated that he is emotionally very vulnerable, he's stated that he's not too fond of spinning plates that he get's bored easily.................obviously in my opinion he would be better addressing his boundary issues and fixing the holes that are there......rather than running out and jumping "back in the game".........
.......if he's already feeling "hurt" how is jumping straight back in the ring going to heal those wounds and address the underlying issues.....
....it won't......in fact...."getting straight back in the game" while one is feeling emotionally vulnerable is a bit naive and risks destroying someone's already fragile confidence......

I'm not suggesting that he go to therapy for the next 6 months to a year and then get back out there.........but there is no rush. Surely people have seen emotionally vulnerable people not being able to handle any type of rejection and what happens......they then tend to become more reclusive...............

There is no rush. If you got injured in the ring (a nasty nose break or something) would you jump straight back in the following day? Nah anyone would any intelligence would heal firstly and build back up little by little.....

It's easy to sit at your keyboard when you're a fantasist and type "rah rah bro....you the fvcking man. Eat more raw meat. Lift more on your squat. rah rah. Get back out there and show them bytches that you the prize"....

...Then reality enters the equation.

Beware the snake oil salesman.

 

[Juanto]

Have to say, I tend to agree with Deesade here. Maybe not immediately, but definately in my view the best way to put this girl behind is to date new girls, and meet new people.

 

[Urbanyst]

So what happens when/if the money runs out?

Smart people don't let that happen.

 

[Reykhel]

When I was last feeling like this, speaking with other women was hugely enjoyable.

Didn't even have any intention of escalating. Just enjoyed flirting. Gaining back perspective after a case of oneitis in a light-hearted manner.

Of course, you can disagree. But the constant long drawn-out personal attacks are typical of a spiteful little man.

As I told you before, the difference between the caring and uncaring arsehole.

https://heartiste.wordpress.com/2011/12/22/caring-vs-uncaring-*******ry/

Google "Heartiste uncaring *ssholery".

You Sir, are most certainly the former. Not good.

LOL

Oh my god, this kid is priceless.......I had just told him that I was surprised he had not backed up his advise
with a link to chateau heartiste...........and what does he do........he bases his "assessment" on me being an uncaring arsehole...on a manosphere wordpress blog by chateau heartiste .......and even provides the fvcking link!!!!!!!!!

All of his theory is just regurgitated from other manosphere blogs.......bonecracker and chateau heartiste are seemingly his
favorite.........

Boring void of original thought and void of personal experience.

Your posts scream that you don't give a damn about your fellow man, not even members of your own family. You do what you
want after all......Well at least in your fantasy world.

I think you it's evident that you see yourself in that blog, projecting your nasty "qualities" on to me will do no good.

Go on now, spam post the link to that blog...............

 

[Reykhel]

@deesade

Beautiful projection.......We know quite well who is the shameless liar. You were found out, kid. We both know.

Daygame fantasist and they are all buying your lies......

 

[9Volt]

Terrible advice, Davey boy.

Endorsing that he get back in the field asap shows you don't understand where the guy is coming from and shows
a real lack of world experience and understanding. I'm surprised you didn't send a link from Chateau Heartiste to back up what you're saying...
Clearly your experience comes from reading blogs and banging on your keyboard......and following the other mgtow extremist like his
little lap dog endorsing everything he says.....oh wait......

The guy has just wrote a thread entitled "So I just got my heart ripped to shreds...", so he's obviously emotionally fragile right now....going
right back out an gaming is probably not the best solution for him right now.

I know Davey boy (erroneously ) believes he's giving value......but he's wrong. Why? Value is like currency. People view value in different ways according to their needs and wants. It's like if Davey took his English pounds and went to France (hypothetically speaking, if he were ever to travel outside of his village. Imagine) and he tried to use his English pounds. To him the English pounds are valuable, but to the French they are worthless. The value they want are Euros....

...just like when he gives advice based on his sexual strategy and paradigm of the world. To him it seems valuable....for normal fully functioning people it's worthless. (for example people who work don't have the time to stand outside their local supermarket eating a sandwich and approaching a hot woman every 2 minutes............whether that's real or make believe is beside the point)

MGTARDS say "mgtow" is whatever you want it to be while needing to label it.

MGTARDS also say what they want whether it makes sense or not, contradicts themselves etc.

There's quite a few closet mgtards on here. Easy to spot as the same bs can be found being spewed by other mgtards online, in videos, blogs etc.

Reclusive social outcasts, mental midgets, and gullible "human relations scientists", cartoon characters etc. miserable morons the lot of them.

 

[fastlife]

Take away your options. What are you? Take away your money. What are you? Basing your self-esteem on external material rather than what your abilities can manifest is just a temporary band-aid to the void all of us have. As per spinning plates. Not many can say when they are stripped down to their bare-d!ck that they are enough. If you want to talk about value, it is this. Not your money, not your options. Those are all but manifestations of your inner abilities.

Bro, you probably don't see it now, but what you're going through now is the exact process by which you reach the kind of mindset above. Every time you get over something that hurts, it provides proof to your mind that you get over things & nothing really changes. The problem is that most people will use whatever rationalizations ("I didn't really like her anyway," "She was a slvt") to never face the real pain of rejection ("Why don't I feel like I'm enough?").

Now where 'Pick Up,' or even 'Spinning Plates (since technically you have to pick up a plate at some point), has an advantage is that you're exposed to rejection & success much more rapidly than you would be with the occasional comfort traps of serial monogamy or MGTOW.

There are no shortcuts--you knew going in that this girl wasn't what was right for you at this point in your life BUT the idea of being her seemed a lot better than the idea of going back out and cold approaching more girls, some of whom will reject you and tell you to fvck off--and who knows when you'll meet another girl like her, etc... What you're feeling now is what scarcity feels like--and you don't have to spin plates to have abundance but you sure as hell have to always know when to walk away--and do it.

 

[BeExcellent]

Sigh. Well that sucks. You wanted sex and she wants to save her chastity for the man she marries. She is principled. Her virginity matters to her. So many here are so jaded they can't see that such a woman might really exist. They don't acknowledge such a woman's value.

There exist such women. This one has dismissed you as too sexually pushy.

You valued her principles in spite of yourself and you realize she is a rare bird. It hurts that someone who values themselves does not also value you....

But alas you wanted different things. She knows you value sex more than you value her commitment to remain chaste. So you are fundamentally incompatible in her mind & she has withdrawn.

You are young yet & don't realize how rare a girl this is. And that is OK.

Men who think every woman has sex prior to marriage are mostly correct...but even very experienced men don't know what to do with women like this. That's how rare such women are as you get older. So running into a woman who is actually serious about her virginity throws men for a loop.

Women like this are the most sought after. She knows it. She will exchange her chastity for a serious commitment/marriage and she is not going to settle. I am teaching my girls the same. I'm sorry this happened but I'm not shocked.

Take your time & get over it. You'll be OK.

 

[Konada]

Sigh. Well that sucks. You wanted sex and she wants to save her chastity for the man she marries. She is principled. Her virginity matters to her. So many here are so jaded they can't see that such a woman might really exist. They don't acknowledge such a woman's value.

There exist such women. This one has dismissed you as too sexually pushy.

You valued her principles in spite of yourself and you realize she is a rare bird. It hurts that someone who values themselves does not also value you....

But alas you wanted different things. She knows you value sex more than you value her commitment to remain chaste. So you are fundamentally incompatible in her mind & she has withdrawn.

You are young yet & don't realize how rare a girl this is. And that is OK.

Men who think every woman has sex prior to marriage are mostly correct...but even very experienced men don't know what to do with women like this. That's how rare such women are as you get older. So running into a woman who is actually serious about her virginity throws men for a loop.

Women like this are the most sought after. She knows it. She will exchange her chastity for a serious commitment/marriage and she is not going to settle. I am teaching my girls the same. I'm sorry this happened but I'm not shocked.

Take your time & get over it. You'll be OK.

To be honest and I will definitely get roasted for this. Sex was the last thing on my mind when we were making out, albeit it got a little more intense than last time. I just can't wrap my head around how she can pull a 180 so fast.

 

[bigneil]

Some thoughts:

1) I fell in love with a girl who I never had sex with in 2015 (and I could have as we had spent the night at a hotel). I moved away just hours after last seeing her naked in bed (on another date) and love her to this day, though we never spoke again. Sometimes you meet a girl who has such a pure aura you want to preserve it, so you don't have sex. Elvis didn't have sex with Priscilla Presley until their wedding day. That said, it's a bad idea to date a girl and not have sex with her (within a few dates). It causes weird issues such as blue balls.

2) If you kissed a virgin, that's on par with having sex with a Millennial. Credit where due.

3) Why are you declaring it over? Women always revert back to their average behavior over the course of the relationship. Ignore the extreme highs and extreme lows.

4) Women who are extra accommodating, extra sweet, or extra sought after MUST blow men off more - they can't please everyone all the time. Cut them more slack and give them extra space.

 

[marmel75]

Why are you getting attached so fast? Are you that desperate for any type of validation the first one to give it to you is worth her weight in gold?