Hey team. I went on 3 dates with a girl. Definite chemistry and a lot of fun. Kissed her on the second date and she came over on the third. We did the deed and she was asking about sleeping over. I told her that I usually don’t do sleep overs this early. She got pretty angry and things got awkward. She ended up calling it a night and left. I tend to not do any sleep overs until there has been a talk regarding exclusivity. What do you all do?
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Sleeping over?
- Thread starter Cavalier
- Start date
What happens, IN HER MIND, is that she comes to see you as WORTHLESS simply because she hasn't had to INVEST anything in you in order to get you or to keep you.
You were an interesting diversion while she had nothing else to do. But now that someone a little more valuable has come along, someone who expects her to treat him very well, she'll have no problem at all dropping you or demoting you to lowly "friendship" status.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.
FlexpertHamilton
Master Don Juan
I have never quite separated sleepovers from commitment, but I don't tend to do them early on, at least the first few weeks or month or so. Personally I don't like them, but literally 100% of women get indignant about sleepovers after a certain point.
Pierce Manhammer
Moderator
Just make sure to change the linens between plates and look for their hair everywhere…
I don’t mind sleepovers either. But it’s case by case.
I don’t mind sleepovers either. But it’s case by case.
I'm with Howiestern, I have no issue with it. I just tend to shoo them out the door as early as possible come the morning.
Just remember women tend to be upset 'right now'. If she likes you she'll respect it in another moment.
Just remember women tend to be upset 'right now'. If she likes you she'll respect it in another moment.
Hah. I swear redheads are the worst for this!
Just because a woman listens to you and acts interested in what you say doesn't mean she really is. She might just be acting polite, while silently wishing that the date would hurry up and end, or that you would go away... and never come back.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.
EyeOnThePrize
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@Cavalier
That's pretty cold and makes it seem like all you wanted was sex with a random object, since not letting her spend that same night implies you don't like spending time with her as a person at all, and that the dates were just fake shiit to get your diick wet. I think most self respecting women would get upset or cut ties unless you had a good reason.
What's the problem with letting girls crash and fuucking em again in the morning?
That's pretty cold and makes it seem like all you wanted was sex with a random object, since not letting her spend that same night implies you don't like spending time with her as a person at all, and that the dates were just fake shiit to get your diick wet. I think most self respecting women would get upset or cut ties unless you had a good reason.
What's the problem with letting girls crash and fuucking em again in the morning?
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SW15
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I don't think it's a big deal. I also wouldn't read that much into it in terms of her desire for commitment either. Are you not wanting her to sleep over due to not wanting to commit to exclusivity or be pressured for exclusivity?
roaming shark
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I avoid them especially early. It generates unnecessary and superficial attachment
BackInTheGame78
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I will let them stay over but I won't stay over at theirs for a while. I'm at my best in the mornings in regards to sex.
IKO69
Master Don Juan
Well you piped her man, she's in the palm of your hand now. Emotions are running high - she will probably push you more and more to become serious and that's really what her outburst was all about.
Don't worry about her being upset. She will likely hit you up soon. I think you did the right thing. If you don't do sleep overs with girls you barely you know, then that's that. If you are firm about it she'll respect you more
Don't worry about her being upset. She will likely hit you up soon. I think you did the right thing. If you don't do sleep overs with girls you barely you know, then that's that. If you are firm about it she'll respect you more
Doctor Europeo
Moderator
You had sex, you won. At that point, I wouldnt mind letting her spend the night.
FlexpertHamilton
Master Don Juan
I sleep much better sleeping alone.
There are studies that show married couples who sleep in seperate beds get far better sleep.
Biggest issue for me is the fact that I like it around 64F which is too cold for 100% of women. They also want to cuddle which also warms me up way too much to sleep. And if you're a very light sleeper it's hard to share a bed no matter what, since they'll wake you up constantly with their tossing and turning or snoring.