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Single Because Everybody Thinks I’m “Claimed” By My Best Friend

TheCharmingGuy

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I have a best friend who I have known for several years. She is a girl. We are very close and we care about each other, but not on any sort of romantic level. Nonetheless, every girl I meet shows no interest in me because they all think that I am “claimed” by the girl who is my best friend. I have tried to tell them that we are not dating, but it seems they think that we are really “cute together” and refuse to accept that we are NOT a pair. I feel lonely as I cannot ask out a girl because they think that I am already hooked up with someone else. When I talked to my best friend about it, they apologize, and say that they are having similar problems as me. Does anybody have advice for myself and my friend to break through the stereotypes?
 

Romanemp22

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I would suggest don't go out with your bf girl at places you want to meet and hook up with women. Women will always categories you even if you're with your sister. Also is your friend maybe c0ckblocking you that you don't know, does she sometimes hit on you subconsciously?
 

TheCharmingGuy

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She never hits on me, although to an outsider it definitely might look like it. As for dating, it is in the unwritten rules of our friendship that we do not want to date. And I still wouldn’t risk my best friend for a relationship that wouldn’t work out anyway. And thanks, I will try going places without this girl when I want to hook up. :)
 

CAPSLOCK BANDIT

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Women are masters of notspeak, where if directly confronted they say not, but when asked what she wants, will talk about the thing she can't have.

You are not claimed romantically but socially, I have had similar issues with 2 women in my life but the wall of Sex was broken very early on in both instances, so we just bang every now and then.

In these situations it's basically your job to either blow up the relationship or profit from it in some way, otherwise, in the great words of Patrice O'Neil, "you'll be her little time boy"

I've been time boy before, it's brutal.
 

BackInTheGame78

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I find this hard to believe...women LOVE guys that they think are "off limits"...something they find exciting and taboo about it...

More likely that is just an easy excuse to use
 

Black Widow Void

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Welcome aboard.

While some women from afar might be intrigued with a man that they perceive as taken, your situation strikes me as different.

My observations aren't put downs, but they lead me to wonder if these are the dormant obstacles.

I suspect that you've chosen this female to be your friend because
A: She provides you some emotional fulfillment (women sometimes emotionally cheat on their boyfriends, but never sleep with these guys)
B; You like her as more than a friend, but either you haven't tried to attempt things further or she's made it known she's not interested.
C: You are getting something from this female friendship that you cannot get from a male friendship (think about this one for a while) .

Again, these are not put downs.

Seeing as though your moniker seems to be a reference to "The Smiths." (and while they were an excellent band) I'm not sure that any self-identification toward Morrissey is an image that you'd want to project (to women, that is).

From reading your first two postings, it's my opinion that you like the girl *more* than just your "friend." I take it that you don't want to risk the friendship by making your true feelings known...or is it that you already know her feelings toward you?
 
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coyote_astro

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If she offered to suck your di*k on a Saturday evening, would you really say no? Be honest.
 
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