Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Silliest/Funniest Pick-up lines

Flabbergasped?

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I will like to say that these are NOT for field usage. It's me trying to have a little fun on the interwebs XD. I'm going to post some idiotic lines that I've heard/used, and you can do the same. Be wary of using them in actual practice, because pick-up lines don't work.

I made this one, it rocks my box: "Do you work at Office Depot? 'Cus you're fine like .5 mm lead"

"Are your parents terrorists? Cus you are the bomb" <=== said this one to a paki girl just to see what reaction I could pull out, she just laughed.

"How about you sit on my lap and we'll talk about the first thing that pops up." <== Some girl actually did it, and I said "So, did you hear about the stock market?" A jolly moment.

"Are you tired? You've been running through my mind all day." <== So common, but probably the worst.

"Did it hurt? When you fell from heaven."

Another one I made up in those glorious AFC days: "The police will be at your house in 24 hours." <== They're usually curious as to what this is since it sounds so random. Then, I say, "You stole my heart, that's a felony around here."

Again, don't use these. They're for a good laugh only.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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dannowillbookem

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another one is

(looking at the screen) you look familiar... meh probably because i've seen a million threads just like this
 

Steg

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"Do you sleep on your back?"
Yes/No
"Can I?"

I'm Exo,btw. Lost my goddamn e-mail and password.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Alittude

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Do you raise chickens? Because you sure did raise my ****k
 

GloriouslyInsane

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Well i remember this one time that i overheard one of my buds saying to a girl "you're so sweet,your father must be a candymaker(well this is not the goddamn english word but anw you get the point)" , so i put a little twist to it and said "nah,she's SOOO beautiful her father MUST be a plastic surgeon",of course i didn'r know back then this was a semi-neghit.
 

MuayThai

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A good response for "I have a boyfriend" is...

"so I don't wanna **** your boyfriend"

I've used it a few times, with positive results.
 
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