Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
If she's going to flake she'll latch onto this as her opportunity to flake. If she says it's okay then it's a fair bet she'll show up."Hey, I'll be about 5 minutes late. Is that okay?"
If they text you they're on their way then the date is still a go. If not, then do something else. If they don't text and do show then it's their own fault for not texting you like they were supposed to."I'm got a couple errands to run. Text me when you're on your way and I'll meet you blah blah blah."
You definitely wanna get that worm up before the date.Pr0lab said:Should I txt her before the date (as a worm up?)
I talked to her on Wed. the date is over the weekend
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
ye I ment warmdavewe said:You definitely wanna get that worm up before the date.
This message can be translated in a wrong way. As in; "i cant wait till our date is over, so i can do other things instead of hanging out with you".Pr0lab said:she actually a friend of a friend.
I believe it's not gonna be a flake, I want to txt to just worm her up, something like "can't wait for this day to be over! how is yours"
What d you think?
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
I'd say that's a bad way to frame the text. It'll put her on the defensive. It's hard to say if she's really interested though. One one hand if a woman wants to date you she'll take roadblocks out of the way, not put them up. And it sounds as if she's hiding behind the logistics so she doesn't have to date you instead of working to overcome them. On the other hand she did offer up alternatives, so that's a VERY good sign. I'd say try to find a middle ground, stick it out for the semester, then see where things stand.Pr0lab said:So this is the situation ...
She claims she has no time because of school, she sends txts and says sorry I can do it blah blah blah... the school is 2hr away so it's not an option to go on a date to her campus and she doesn't come back home often. but this is her last semester. so I am thinking to write something like "was nice to meet you. It was a bad idea to ask you out before school starts and I am also have no time now. I still think you're an interesting person to get to know.
but when fall semester ends you gonna take me out for a coffee for all the troubles"
On one hand she seams to be interested in the date but on the other she goes running(facebook) as opposed to go out with me
How is that? I just have no power in this situation at all, so I try to maneuver as much as I can to give it a chance when she's back.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.