"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Should i message her?

Physicist.

Don Juan
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So there's this girl that i quite like, we've been talking for only 2 weeks or so(though i knew her from school) and i had invited her on a date, she said she couldn't so like a week after i asked her out again, the message got to her but it isnt marked as "seen" on facebook, about 3 days have gone by. She either full blown ignored me (extremely likely) or she hasnt seen it for some reason(unlikely but i dint see her as the type to ignore me), i havent spoken to her since and I want to message her but on the other hand am resisting the urge quite well.
I should just move on right? It's hurting so much, no other girl in years made me feel so attracted to her f*ckkkk
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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marmel75

Master Don Juan
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Dude...pull yourself together and stop being ridiculous.
 

Thorninmyside

Master Don Juan
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So there's this girl that i quite like, we've been talking for only 2 weeks or so(though i knew her from school) and i had invited her on a date, she said she couldn't so like a week after i asked her out again, the message got to her but it isnt marked as "seen" on facebook, about 3 days have gone by. She either full blown ignored me (extremely likely) or she hasnt seen it for some reason(unlikely but i dint see her as the type to ignore me), i havent spoken to her since and I want to message her but on the other hand am resisting the urge quite well.
I should just move on right? It's hurting so much, no other girl in years made me feel so attracted to her f*ckkkk
She read it, then marked it as unread, then clicked "ignore messages" so you don't ask her again. Move on.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Daniel_March

Don Juan
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I know you are expecting that someone here will have a solution to this. But there is no magic bullet - no matter how much we all would want to believe that she just "did not read" the message. Come on - we've had "Delivered" "Seen" notifications on chat tools for so long that it is easy to read a message without actually opening it. Move on - plenty of girls out there.

P.S. if you really really really want to - contact her 2-3 weeks later - but the likelihood of her responding is very low.
 

Glassguy

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Just ignore. Why punish yourself?

If you ever initiate messaging her again it looks extremely weak.

If you ignore and vanish, she MIGHT find some attraction to how you will walk away.

Remember that most women want what they cant have. Why put yourself out there as if she can have you whenever she "becomes available"?

I have chalked up numerous lays from doing this. A little chit chat and they go cold. So I vanish. Weeks later they message me and ask what I am doing this weekend. I say "Hey stranger, I have a very busy weekend coming up." At that point I vanish again if they dont say "well I was hoping we could get together for a drink".

Sorry, cant this weekend. Maybe next week. I will let you know.

Then I wait several days and reach out. "I have a rare free evening coming up on Wednesday. I am going to grab drinks if you want to join".
Or I just ignore again. Sometimes flipping the script will draw their attention but either way, you just move on to more chicks.

Move on.
 
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