"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Should I let my dog die a virgin?

O

Obsidian

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Well, I don't think this dog needs an LTR necessarily. You can always let him pimp the hor dogs. A chihuahua may be a bit of a stretch, tho.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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WhiskeyRox

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The reason your dog is a virgin is because HE'S GAY! Brittany spaniels? Get a MAN'S DOG, like a german shepard or a rottweiler! Who cares if your prissy little pansy spaniel gets laid. Too many worthless yappy dogs in the world anyway. Anything under 45 pounds is a rodent.
 
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Francisco d'Anconia

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F

Francisco d'Anconia

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WhiskeyRox said:
The reason your dog is a virgin is because HE'S GAY! Brittany spaniels? Get a MAN'S DOG, like a german shepard or a rottweiler! Who cares if your prissy little pansy spaniel gets laid. Too many worthless yappy dogs in the world anyway. Anything under 45 pounds is a rodent.
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Yeah, everyone knows that Spaniels are emo.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Jariel

Jariel

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Whoa there I know it's hard to find decent women, but surely things aren't that bad! Whatever you are thinking of doing to your dog or having it do to you is between you, him and animal rights movements, but give it some thought first! :)

Just kidding. I had a good laugh from this thread.
 
L

Last Man Standing

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The llittle hor chihuahua dug a hole and was in my yard and my dog was all over her - I think she's too small for him - he'll probably split her in half!! I picked the little hor up and shot her over the fence and the look on my dog's face was as if he wanted to kick my ass!!

I put boards along the fence to keep the little horny dog out and went to wash my car - after I finished I went to the backyard and she was there again with a seemingly satisfied look on her face and all starry-eyed!! I quickly looked at my dog - he was chilling out on the bench smoking a cigarette and had a martini in his paw - I was like ohhhhhh no!!!! Did they do it?

I guess I have to wait and see if she has an orange and white spaniel mix - how many months is that?
 
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Obsidian

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haha, you shouldn't be assuming that your dog is so innocent
 
C

CLOONEY

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Last Man Standing said:
The llittle hor chihuahua dug a hole and was in my yard and my dog was all over her - I think she's too small for him - he'll probably split her in half!! I picked the little hor up and shot her over the fence and the look on my dog's face was as if he wanted to kick mt ass!!

I put boards along the fence to keep the little horny dog out and went to wash my car - after I finished I went to the backyard and she was there again with a seemingly satisfied look on her face and all starry-eyed!! I quickly looked at my dog - he was chilling out on the bench smoking a cigarette and had a martini in his paw - I was like ohhhhhh no!!!! Did they do it?

I guess I have to wait and see if she has an orange and white spaniel mix - how many months is that?
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aaaaaaaaaahahahahaahahahahahahaahahahahhahhaha. That is some funny sh*t!!!!! hahaahahahahaha.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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R

Raikojo17

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lol nice fransico. that was hilarious

but LMS i can help you out man. my dog is a virgin and not a hor dog. i never let her go out anywhere alone. i have to be with her. and if she escapes i chase her down. she's a good little angel who wont give it up until marraige

she'd be perfect for your dog, if he likes taller women. she's hot too:up:
 
K

Kid Quick

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Since you have a purebred you could charge a stud fee for breeding. Make some money and give Rover some excitement.
 
penkitten

penkitten

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dude, call the vet and get him on the stud list.
someone will call and tell you they want to breed their spaniel with yours. tell them how much your fee is, it is usually whatever a puppy costs.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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