"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Should I back way off?

X

xectxny19x

Don Juan
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I've been dating this girl for 7 months. One problem with her is that sometimes she'll seem distant, but every time she sees girls flirting with me, she's all over me. :crazy: Now she's appearing distant again. She'll send me a short text saying where she is, what she's doing, "i miss you," or "i love you," and that's it. I'll back off for at most 3 days and hang out with my friends and some girls, and then she's all of a sudden available any time and anywhere. Honestly, I'm getting tired of this.

It's just that when she's around and affectionate, it's seriously like a dream. Then when she's distant with no explanation whatsoever, in fact, she even tells me she has nothing to do for the day, it's crushing.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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S

SuSHI

Senior Don Juan
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lose her man, I know it's hard, but it will be for the best. But before you do, look around for your next girl. And in the mean while, use her for sex. Play her off like you have other girls interested (if that is not the case) so you can keep getting it, and be on the look out for a girl that will actually treat you right. Cause I hate to say it, but it sounds like your girl is a fickle attention whroe.
 
D

Diaforetikos

Senior Don Juan
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Northern California
SuSHI said it right. It sounds like she just wants attention. When you give her too much, she ignores you because you gave her what she wanted. She'll keep playing those games because you let it become a normal thing in the relationship.

Like SuSHI said, just drop her and move on to the next girl. She'll keep playing that game if you don't.
 
F

F!DELITY

Don Juan
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To the OP, im in virtually the exact same position...only my relationship is only a month.

Like you, I feel completely sick of this ****...how hard is it for a girl to make the effort to contact you every once in a while!? its as if she doesn't care, right?

Im currently my 3rd day of NC...and the longer it goes on the more pissed off im getting....this could be a major dealbreaker for me with this girl...If it carrys on I'm gonna have to end it...even though when I'm with her its great!

Good luck with your decision man, whatever it is you do.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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