"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Should I back way off?

X

xectxny19x

Don Juan
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I've been dating this girl for 7 months. One problem with her is that sometimes she'll seem distant, but every time she sees girls flirting with me, she's all over me. :crazy: Now she's appearing distant again. She'll send me a short text saying where she is, what she's doing, "i miss you," or "i love you," and that's it. I'll back off for at most 3 days and hang out with my friends and some girls, and then she's all of a sudden available any time and anywhere. Honestly, I'm getting tired of this.

It's just that when she's around and affectionate, it's seriously like a dream. Then when she's distant with no explanation whatsoever, in fact, she even tells me she has nothing to do for the day, it's crushing.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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S

SuSHI

Senior Don Juan
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lose her man, I know it's hard, but it will be for the best. But before you do, look around for your next girl. And in the mean while, use her for sex. Play her off like you have other girls interested (if that is not the case) so you can keep getting it, and be on the look out for a girl that will actually treat you right. Cause I hate to say it, but it sounds like your girl is a fickle attention whroe.
 
D

Diaforetikos

Senior Don Juan
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SuSHI said it right. It sounds like she just wants attention. When you give her too much, she ignores you because you gave her what she wanted. She'll keep playing those games because you let it become a normal thing in the relationship.

Like SuSHI said, just drop her and move on to the next girl. She'll keep playing that game if you don't.
 
F

F!DELITY

Don Juan
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To the OP, im in virtually the exact same position...only my relationship is only a month.

Like you, I feel completely sick of this ****...how hard is it for a girl to make the effort to contact you every once in a while!? its as if she doesn't care, right?

Im currently my 3rd day of NC...and the longer it goes on the more pissed off im getting....this could be a major dealbreaker for me with this girl...If it carrys on I'm gonna have to end it...even though when I'm with her its great!

Good luck with your decision man, whatever it is you do.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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