"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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shes clearly not interested, gave me email?

big weezy

Master Don Juan
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i just tried picking up this girl in starbucks just now.. turns out she spent the past 3 years back in my families country which threw me off my game as i got too excited.

anyway i f'd up the first 5 mins of convo and she was like 'i need to get back to my application'

then she packed up after 5 mins.. and i tried attempting to engage convo with her to attract her to make up for my poor showing first time round. was under time pressure tho. negged a bit.

anyway i suggested we get together.. and then she gives me the whole fake number thing.. how should u react to this? i knew what she was doing but didnt want to say anything.. felt agrieved tho.

what should u do when she gives u a fake number and u call it and it fails? i told her.. 'it doesn't work' then shes like 'give me yours' i generally dont want to give my number out to girls cos i know that means they're not interested. but i wrote it down anyway. maybe i shoulda said 'its cool dont worry i'll see u around' cos by giving my number she knows im interested still, but saying no then she'll feel shes lost me even if she doesnt want me.

she then proceeds to give me her email saying 'i dont do phones..' im like 'what? how do u not do phones..' she had a phone out on the table with her i saw and she goes 'i didnt bring my phone' i didnt say anythign about seeing it i dont know if theres any point really.. she gives me her email and goes 'i dont do phones i do email' i go 'you're making this very difficult' then i go 'well i dont do email'

she said bye but i didnt really acknowledge her in more than a friendly way.

not interested. my fault for not gaming her properly. i might as well throw away this email address, shes lying to me that she didn't have a phone.. should i have said something about seeing 1 on her table just before?

its just insulting my intelligence really.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Mr. Suave

Don Juan
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Haha what are you worried about? You should just be pleased with yourself for trying. Also honestly I would have just taken her email and left, not said much more. If she doesn't want to give up her number there's no need to make a big deal about it, to be honest it's not like the phone is some magical type of conversation device. Most people just text now anyway so it really isn't much different.

You should've got her email, sent her a message on there and see what happens, sounds like you got a bit stand off-ish which you shouldn't have done. If she doesn't get back to you on e-mail it doesn't matter too much but I would've tried it.
 

Aaron B

Master Don Juan
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she's proven herself to be a pain in the rear

Women in general are difficult enough to deal with, why try to get with one of the more glaring examples?
 

Mantis Toboggan

Master Don Juan
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With 99% of your pickups happening at Starbucks, man I hope you're not a coffee drinker.

That Starbucks stuff would make me jittery and nervous just talking to my mom.

Maybe you should find a bar to hang out or something. A place with depressants and not stimulants.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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