She wished me happy birthday after 6 months of no contact

maxalton

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I had a close relationship with a girl I liked. We weren't exclusive, but we were close. "Good friends" as she put it. To make a long story short, I became needy and clingy and it started to increasingly turn her off. Of course, I didn't realize my behavior until it was too late. She was becoming cold and distant. Until I pursued one final time through text and she pretty much dumped me/blew me off, in July. In the breakup text-exchange we had where I was being needy and acting like a beta, she acknowledged how we were "good friends" as she put it, and basically told me that how I was acting in that moment was turning her off more (thats essentially what she was saying). I mustered the strength not to contact her ever since. We're still friends on facebook/instagram. We dont talk, but we can see eachothers pictures/statuses obviously. Her birthday was in September, and I had the strength not to reach out. My birthday was a few days ago and she messaged me happy birthday, after 6 months of not speaking. I just think it's unnatural for somebody to wish somebody else a happy birthday when they've been on non-speaking terms for several months (and I ignored her birthday.) Of course, there's the possibility she's "just being nice" but what's really the point of "being nice" when she pushed me away and we havent even spoken for several months? What kind of behavior is this? Is she dipping her toe in the water?
 

C00lAF

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She wants to see if her puppy still remember her.its like giving a dog up for adoption and checking on it from time to time to see if he is still happy to see you or remembers you with no intention of taking it back,you break the dogs heart again and listen to it despretly barking to get your attention and left dissapointed when he thod that he is going back home.
 

Milano

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Yeah my ex did that after 3 months no contact, I called her on her bluff cause I wanted to see if she was up for sx and she said she only wanted to say hi. She got the attention she wanted and won.

Another girl in my class wished me merry Christmas after no contact for several months. They are just testing the waters, if they care they would invest in a proper message.

I failed twice here, trick is to not respond to any "hello", or "how are you?". Force them into investing or GTFO
 

bigneil

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After 6 months, you are (we assume for the love of God) over her, so it can't hurt to try again. Relationship dynamics change every 3 months (especially if your birthday is around now) so don't play any games. You might even just come clean and tell her you had feelings for her before. Here is where that romantic stuff works if she ever had any feelings for you.
 

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exhausted

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After 6 months, you are (we assume for the love of God) over her, so it can't hurt to try again. Relationship dynamics change every 3 months (especially if your birthday is around now) so don't play any games. You might even just come clean and tell her you had feelings for her before. Here is where that romantic stuff works if she ever had any feelings for you.
You think 3 months can change a person?
Or a girl would be willing to try again? I dont see it, they move on in 5 mins while we men spend months healing. ****ing ****s.
I wouldnt be able to get back with an ex that i loved just to bang, for some reason if i truly loved them it will just **** me up or id develop feelings for them again id assume.

Other girls i saw for short or long periods that didnt get serious i can bang anytime as if i was changing their tire.
 

Infern0

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Ignore it.

Only respond to pretty much a direct approach in cases like this.

Happy birthday ain't ****.
 

maxalton

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She wants to see if her puppy still remember her.its like giving a dog up for adoption and checking on it from time to time to see if he is still happy to see you or remembers you with no intention of taking it back,you break the dogs heart again and listen to it despretly barking to get your attention and left dissapointed when he thod that he is going back home.
but whats the point? I can see her being cold and ruthless like that if I mistreated her, but I didnt. I acted like a beta sure, but I never mistreated her to where she would want her to do something vengeful like that
 

maxalton

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Are any of u familiar with Coach corey wayne on youtube? Somebody had a similiar situation and he said it's a low-risk way for her to put her finger in the water and see what things are like. who knows?
 

Von

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I cant believe girls have time to waste like that.

If a girl do that (Breakup, NC for months and you guys have history or sex).. she à waste of time.

She does that for her ego and its sad she has to go back in her past to find it.

In these case you reply: "who this?" or you do nothing.

However if you wanna be funny write this: "Hey Britney, I am free for sex, at X hour at our usual spot, bring the whip".. if she repliés anything "what you not britney, well if you are à girl and sexy, join us"
 

Roober

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How close were you guys? secks? To be honest, I am a bit torn on this one myself. I don't think my ex will ever reach out, but if it is a communication that doesn't warrant a response, not sure how to respond...

You can ignore - either she will text again or realize she lost and not try again. To me, by texting after 6 months, that says she is thinking about you. If this woman is attractive as has options, she has no reason to message you. Also could be that she broke up with another guy, and it looking for something secure...

"thanks" - will open conversation or not...

Or try the corey wayne approach "Nice to hear from you, I would love to see you." - she will think she still has you hooked or she will legitimately try to see you...

REgardless of the choice, treat her like a plate... she doesn't warrant any attention from you... she is the bottom of a deep barrel
 

bigneil

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You think 3 months can change a person?
I'm saying that every 3 months the dynamics of a relationship change, for every person, in every relationship. Look at your relationships and you will observe how they often end, stumble or restart after 3 to 6 months exactly. This is not a coincidence.

You think... a girl would be willing to try again? I dont see it, they move on in 5 mins while we men spend months healing.
Not for me. I've been dating 2 strippers half my age, one for 3 months, one for 2 months. They both initiated texts offering love, dates, excitement and hearts within the past 24 hours. Meanwhile 2 other strippers initiated and a bartender asked me out. These girls aren't going anywhere, they'll be around. Just be their best option.
 

Roober

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Not for me. I've been dating 2 strippers half my age, one for 3 months, one for 2 months. They both initiated texts offering love, dates, excitement and hearts within the past 24 hours. They aren't going anywhere. Be their best option.

I'm saying that every 3 months the dynamics of a relationship change, for every person, in every relationship. Look at your relationships and you will observe how they often end after 3 to 6 months exactly. This is not a coincidence.
So what would you do? Treat her like a brand new girl?
 

l_e_g_e_n_d

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You think 3 months can change a person?
Or a girl would be willing to try again? I dont see it, they move on in 5 mins while we men spend months healing. ****ing ****s.
Not true, if you're a high-value man and dump a girl for poor behavior, and disappear entirely after the break-up, you will be imbue her thoughts for a very long time.
 

maxalton

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How close were you guys? secks? To be honest, I am a bit torn on this one myself. I don't think my ex will ever reach out, but if it is a communication that doesn't warrant a response, not sure how to respond...

You can ignore - either she will text again or realize she lost and not try again. To me, by texting after 6 months, that says she is thinking about you. If this woman is attractive as has options, she has no reason to message you. Also could be that she broke up with another guy, and it looking for something secure...

"thanks" - will open conversation or not...

Or try the corey wayne approach "Nice to hear from you, I would love to see you." - she will think she still has you hooked or she will legitimately try to see you...

REgardless of the choice, treat her like a plate... she doesn't warrant any attention from you... she is the bottom of a deep barrel
Yeah idk what it means. I actually like this forum. Other forms like loveshack or enotalone are filled with people who mustve faced massive rejections in their lives because their typical responses to peoples questions are "MOVE ON. MOVE ON. IT MEANS NOTHING. MOVE ON."

I was thinking maybe she did it to ease her guilt or to back up her claim several months ago when she said we were "good friends". But at the same time-- several months go by, I ignore her birthday, and then she makes her presence known on MY birthday? I feel like its not something totally harmless like "she was just being nice." why be nice when you coldly pushed me away and we havent spoken in several months? And to answer your question, she is attractive and has alot of options with men.
 
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bigneil

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So what would you do? Treat her like a brand new girl?
No. Treat her like a girl who was romantically involved with you and who you couldn't forget. Hopefully you have improved in the meantime, either physically or financially. Now is the ideal time to ask her out - when she knows you, is reaching out to you, and your feelings have faded.
 

LARaiders85

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but whats the point? I can see her being cold and ruthless like that if I mistreated her, but I didnt. I acted like a beta sure, but I never mistreated her to where she would want her to do something vengeful like that
The Cardinal sin of relationships is disappointing them and wasting their time, NOT objective misbehavior.
 

maxalton

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It's meaningless. Don't overthink and don't break no contact with her.
im not going to break no contact, unless she messages me something worthy of a response. But thats one popular belief that I find online which I dont understand-- "its meaningless." Is she just a robot who wishes anybody and everybody happy birthday regardless of the fact that they're on non-speaking terms?
 
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