"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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She Turned Her Cheek When I Went for the Kiss Close. Do I try Again?

ArrJAy

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I have been stuck in the friend zone with a girl I would rate as a 9.5 on a scale of a 1-10 with 10 being the most attractive. She's not a stripper nor a party girl but can have a good time when a good time is to be had. I've been slowly escalating out of the friend zone by turning everything sexual and turning up the kino more and more with every time I see her. Last weekend I was laying with her in her bed with the lights off listening to Coldplay and just talking about dreams and goals. I decided to start kino escalating by getting closer and giving her a back massage while still talking. As I see her enjoying this, I move away and completely stop with the massage in order to amplify her desire for my touch. It worked and she came even closer to me. I noticed this and rewarded it with slow sensual petting of her forearm while also barely hovering my two fingers over the top of her small baby hairs on her arm. She absolutely enjoyed this and we continued talking. After a few minutes of this and seeing the conversation was turning down I told her that if I were to die tomorrow then the one thing I would regret would be not making out with her. I went slowly in for the kiss close after saying this only to have her turn the cheek. She then asked if it were out of my system yet and I said "No" while going back in only to be denied again. I didn't get upset like an AFC but just turned around and continued having a conversation with her like nothing happened. This seemed to really throw her off as she came closer to me and just wanted to cuddle after that. I left in the morning and have now been acting like nothing happened that night. I continue to turn all of our conversations into sexual conversations and always make it seem like she is the one that is talking sexually to me.

Now my question to those who have possibly been through this before is whether or not I go back to the well and try kiss closing again but approach it in a different way or should I just let it be and accept the friend zone? Thanks in advance!
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Brighty

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Truth hurts, but I'll give it to you straight - you're in the friend zone. Even in the way you post I can tell that you're always trying to spin it at every opportunity to make it appear as though you're not in the friend zone with her. You know you're in the friend zone with her, it sucks but you're going to have to face that, we've all been through it at one point or another. It's not going to happen with this girl, the most important thing is getting that through your head. You need to forget about her and turn your attention towards other women.
 

SamTheHobit

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Dude you have nothing to lose persistent is key.. If she doesn't reciprocate... Leave for a few months and come back.
 

Brighty

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SamTheHobit said:
Dude you have nothing to lose persistent is key.. If she doesn't reciprocate... Leave for a few months and come back.

Persistence doesn't work if you're already in the friend zone, if he does this he's only setting himself up for more emotional distress down the road. He needs to move on and forget about this girl. Why devise some sort of plan to go MIA for a few months and return to try again? What in the world makes this particular woman so important to go through that much effort?
 

NewAndImproved

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ArrJAy said:
I told her that if I were to die tomorrow then the one thing I would regret would be not making out with her.
WHOA!

Dramatic, much?

This is the epitome of AFC.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

B

BeDJ

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ArrJAy said:
I told her that if I were to die tomorrow then the one thing I would regret would be not making out with her.
Which Bruno Mars song was this? :crackup::crackup::crackup:
 

Czech

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I've been slowly escalating out of the friend zone by turning everything sexual and turning up the kino more and more with every time I see her.
Why waste your time when you're already in the Friends' zone?

Last weekend I was laying with her in her bed with the lights off listening to Coldplay and just talking about dreams and goals.
Dude, that is so gay. You would have a better chance cranking up Meatloaf and rolling a fat J in front of her.

This seemed to really throw her off as she came closer to me and just wanted to cuddle after that
Is she your girlfriend? Did you just have sex? Why were you cuddling?

Now my question to those who have possibly been through this before is whether or not I go back to the well and try kiss closing again but approach it in a different way or should I just let it be and accept the friend zone?
You answered your own question.
 

Abcd

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I think you're just freaking her out by being too dramatic. Just be a little less dramatic and more matter of fact when you make your move. Don't do so, so much cuddling beforehand, just a little cuddling is OK, then a quick, confident kiss before she really has time to think about it. You're just giving her time to think and react when you should be going with the flow. Girls don't want your spoken analysis beforehand, it makes them seem like the decision maker. You make the decision and the girl enjoys it, they are not there to analyze the situation and decide whether to kiss you.
 

VladPatton

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You're giving her too much, especially if you're Friend Zoned. Start distancing yourself and act like so called "friends". 'Dreams and goals' talks are for girlfriends that are into you, and let's not even get into the cuddling. That is post-banging material & non-applicable for members of the Friend Zone.

As hard as it may be, your interest level needs to drop significantly once you get airlifted and dropped into the Friend Zone, or else you are gone try, try, try, while some other dude is actually plowing her. What then? You gonna go out and buy condoms for her in hope she'll use one with you?? That's AFC city, and you're the mayor at that point.

She wants to be just friends? Awesome, treat her like a buddy with t!ts, that's all.

Good luck to ya.
 

Harry Wilmington

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I told her that if I were to die tomorrow then the one thing I would regret would be not making out with her.
Soooo... you basically told her if you were to die, the only thing you'd miss about her was that you didn't get physical with her. You didn't say you'd regret not getting to know her more; you didn't say you'd regret not being able to spend more time with her... instead, you basically told her you only desire her physically, not as a whole person.

Hmm, I wonder why she didn't feel ramped up to kiss you after that?
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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marmel75

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Never have had this happen...I actually had a time I went to kiss a girl on the cheek and she turned and kissed me on the lips...like a true AFC back then i screwed this up, even though I later found out she made sure no one was going to be home for a few hours when she invited me over(still lived with parents and sister) cause she was hoping I was going to bang her...

I cringe at my former self sometime....
 

The Bat

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ArrJAy said:
I have been stuck in the friend zone with a girl I would rate as a 9.5 on a scale of a 1-10 with 10 being the most attractive. She's not a stripper nor a party girl but can have a good time when a good time is to be had. I've been slowly escalating out of the friend zone by turning everything sexual and turning up the kino more and more with every time I see her. Last weekend I was laying with her in her bed with the lights off listening to Coldplay and just talking about dreams and goals. I decided to start kino escalating by getting closer and giving her a back massage while still talking. As I see her enjoying this, I move away and completely stop with the massage in order to amplify her desire for my touch. It worked and she came even closer to me. I noticed this and rewarded it with slow sensual petting of her forearm while also barely hovering my two fingers over the top of her small baby hairs on her arm. She absolutely enjoyed this and we continued talking. After a few minutes of this and seeing the conversation was turning down I told her that if I were to die tomorrow then the one thing I would regret would be not making out with her. I went slowly in for the kiss close after saying this only to have her turn the cheek. She then asked if it were out of my system yet and I said "No" while going back in only to be denied again. I didn't get upset like an AFC but just turned around and continued having a conversation with her like nothing happened. This seemed to really throw her off as she came closer to me and just wanted to cuddle after that. I left in the morning and have now been acting like nothing happened that night. I continue to turn all of our conversations into sexual conversations and always make it seem like she is the one that is talking sexually to me.

Now my question to those who have possibly been through this before is whether or not I go back to the well and try kiss closing again but approach it in a different way or should I just let it be and accept the friend zone? Thanks in advance!
Is this....is it.....real life?? The hell is this...?

Dude, you're not only in the friend zone, you're also her girlfriend. I mean I don't even....

Coldplay, dreams and goals, back massage, cuddle....and nobody got penetrated? Come on dude...at least don't spend the night with her...

I say you completely forget about this girl, break off all contact, and move on to other women. Nothing good will ever come out of this situation. She will continue to string you along for all the attention you're giving her. I mean, look at this dude...you're putting her on a pedestal....in her mind, you just made her the most important person that has ever lived since if YOU were to die tomorrow, the ONLY thing you'd regret is not kissing her.

:cheer:
 

nismo-4

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You're in the friendzone, you're not getting out, she's not allowing it. Your princess is in another castle. Judge nismo orders you to stop being desperate and go for another girl.

I'm dismissing this asinine case because you know why she's not letting you advance. Get out of my court.
 

bigneil

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This is called the pity peck.

The only escape is to become the After in the Before and After photo.
 

typical

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NO NO NO NO< Next time this happens to anyone you also turn your head and rub your cheek against her cheek and say something silly like "wow I like rubbing cheeks too"

Or some other crap, then continue talking and try again .... the old one step back two steps forward.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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pinkfl

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Sorry =/

She's just not that into you. Don't get me wrong, you sound like a great guy that could be a decent boyfriend that is great with emotional support etc etc but at the end of the day, she's just not feeling you.

The only time I've ever turned my cheek was when I FIRST started going out with a guy and I followed it up with "hey, we just started hanging out and I'm not quite ready for that yet". If you've been friends for a long time she's already made the decision in her mind that you are not a potential.
 
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