She said yes to drinks but set a time limit. Red flag?

[BackInTheGame78]

What are your thoughts on this?

Seems like she was screening to see if you'd be down for nothing serious and wouldn't end up being clingy like the other guys after a while.

But overall seems like her interest wasn't that strong.

Probably best to not waste time with this one even if she reengages...you'll always be the backup to the backup with her.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

[

What you mean?

If you screen for highly interested girls instead of just mildly interested girls, you avoid situations where you feel it was a great date but the girl didn't and ghosts you after 2-3 hours and $80 spent. Much better rate of return with highly interested girls.

 

[BaronOfHair]

I wasn't expecting sex, so much so that I didn't force it...

Continue not doing so, unless you're idea of a fun = Spending the next five years or so fighting off rape charges in a court of law

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Continue not doing so, unless you're idea of a fun = Spending the next five years or so fighting off rape charges in a court of law

How is not expect sex and not forcing things equivalent to 5 years of rape charge defense?

 

[BaronOfHair]

How is not expect sex and not forcing things equivalent to 5 years of rape charge defense?

He wrote "i wasn't expecting sex, so much so that I didn't force it"... Unless he's hunting cooter in a corner of the globe like this https://m.imdb.com/title/tt1157650/ , "not forcing it" is practically common courtesy

 

[BillyPilgrim]

He wrote "i wasn't expecting sex, so much so that I didn't force it"... Unless he's hunting cooter in a corner of the globe like this https://m.imdb.com/title/tt1157650/ , "not forcing it" is practically common courtesy

Weird rationalization expected and DELIVERED.

Good work sir.

 

[Bigpapa]

He wrote "i wasn't expecting sex, so much so that I didn't force it"... Unless he's hunting cooter in a corner of the globe like this https://m.imdb.com/title/tt1157650/ , "not forcing it" is practically common courtesy

Doubt that kissing a girl means that you forcefully escalate for sex

escalation towards sex is step by step with touching bases first, I really doubt that anyone sane would try to escalate towards sex without going through each base in the right order

 

[Divorced w 3]

This is going downhill fast

I haven’t had a chance to weigh in over the weekend

I will today

 

[BaronOfHair]

This is going downhill fast

OP's adventures are thus far proceeding more swimmingly than Aaron Hale's final day at work

Cause to begin this week on a cheerful note

 

[Sega Genesis]

@holidayad_ fwiw below is an excerpt of a post from a woman on another forum explaining why she decided to not go out with a man again after first meet....

Fairly typical of many women in today's dating culture.

>>When we first met I was attracted to his optimism, his positivity and his…energy, maybe even his leadership. I found him physically attractive but not …emotionally magnetic in a lasting way.<<

She is still single by the way and admittedly an "avoidant." Which is also not uncommon in today's dating culture.

 

[Divorced w 3]

@holidayad_ fwiw below is an excerpt of a post from a woman on another forum explaining why she decided to not go out with a man again after first meet....

Fairly typical of many women in today's dating culture.

>>When we first met I was attracted to his optimism, his positivity and his…energy, maybe even his leadership. I found him physically attractive but not …emotionally magnetic in a lasting way.<<

She is still single by the way and admittedly an "avoidant." Which is also not uncommon in today's dating culture.

Ok thanks Freud, you made your point

 

[Sega Genesis]

Ok thanks Freud, you made your point

My pleasure!

 

[Clockwerk50]

It’s been nine pages, so I can’t recall exactly how you got here. Regardless of how the date or meeting went, you have three options:

1. Let her reach out first. If she doesn’t, you risk the small connection you built fading into nothing.

2. Reach out first and directly ask her out.

3. Reach out first, but don’t ask her out, use it instead to gauge her interest and investment.

Both options 2 and 3 require vulnerability, but that’s a core trait every seducer must embrace to move things forward and bring them to a close the right way.

That said, you’ve already planted the seed and hinted at what the future could look like if the two of you hook up. What’s done is done, and there’s no benefit in overthinking. She should now be in your pipeline, gradually investing more and making more moves than you, while you keep talking to other women, if you still want her that is.

 

[Divorced w 3]

I can’t recall exactly how you got here.

so why give advice?

 

[Clockwerk50]

so why give advice?

Whatever was on the first page is a sunk cost; what matters now is the new development in his story.

 

[Divorced w 3]

Whatever was on the first page is a sunk cost; what matters now is the new development in his story.

Not quite… this woman canceled on him about half way into the thread

sometimes not posting, is an option too, if you’re too lazy to go back and find out what happened

it beats giving commentary that in your own words, you’re throwing **** at a wall

 

[Clockwerk50]

Not quite… this woman canceled on him about half way into the thread

sometimes not posting, is an option too, if you’re too lazy to go back and find out what happened

it beats giving commentary that in your own words, you’re throwing **** at a wall

She didn’t cancel. She asked to re-schedule it. Please see below.

UPDATE:

She just sent me the following messages:

"Hey, hi!

I was thinking it would be better to drive back from the show, and I can't drink beforehand.

Can we leave it for next Friday or Saturday?

Are you available?"
[/QUOTE

 

[Bigpapa]

>>When we first met I was attracted to his optimism, his positivity and his…energy, maybe even his leadership. I found him physically attractive but not …emotionally magnetic in a lasting way.<<

He did not escalate, despite her clearly wanted that

 

[holidayad_]

He did not escalate, despite her clearly wanted that

She sat across from me, not next to me. So I'm not sure if she wanted that as we already discussed.

Still, I touched her thigh and her hands.

And I escalate by the end of the date, kissing her.

 

[holidayad_]

It’s been nine pages, so I can’t recall exactly how you got here. Regardless of how the date or meeting went, you have three options:

1. Let her reach out first. If she doesn’t, you risk the small connection you built fading into nothing.

2. Reach out first and directly ask her out.

3. Reach out first, but don’t ask her out, use it instead to gauge her interest and investment.

Both options 2 and 3 require vulnerability, but that’s a core trait every seducer must embrace to move things forward and bring them to a close the right way.

That said, you’ve already planted the seed and hinted at what the future could look like if the two of you hook up. What’s done is done, and there’s no benefit in overthinking. She should now be in your pipeline, gradually investing more and making more moves than you, while you keep talking to other women, if you still want her that is.

Thanks for your input.

Given the circumstances, would you choose option 1, 2 or 3?