"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

She has a boyfriend, so what.

BB123

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I've been talking to this girl for about 3 months and she has a boyfriend but she slept with me anyways the first night we met. So I've seen her a three or four times sense then; getting drinks and back to my place once. Anyways I keep initiating contact rarely does she however I always get a quick response and she seems very interested.
Recently I invited her to and activity and she said she wanted to go but had to work. Pretty clear she was upset she couldn't come because of work. I also figure that she is having issues with the boyfriend at this point. I cut the conversation saying I would take her when she was free but I failed to set the date at that time. She reallllllly wanted to go.
So a day or two later I thought I should probably set the date...and she will not respond suddenly.
I think I should have been more aggressive when I found out she was fighting with her boyfriend and invited her out then because she couldn't come to the date. Or could she just be testing me to see if I will react? I like the girl but I'm not sure how to react? Wait a few more days? Or ask her what is wrong? I know her current relationship is a bit rocky. Could just be something going on.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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BB123

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If she is having relationship issues should I be more available or less?
 

taiyuu_otoko

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BB123 said:
If she is having relationship issues should I be more available or less?

less. Any overt conversations about her relationship with her boyfriend, and you may come across as trying to be his replacement. Unless you want to, avoid those kind of conversations, lest you become the rebound boyfriend.

lay back for a while, and look around for other girls in the meantime.

let her come to you. don't be needy.
 

BB123

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Well I have tried that before and waited two weeks. She won't initiate contact; only once back when we first met. If I go a week or two without texting her I find out she wants me to contact her through her friends or facebook. I don't know what to make of it.
 

SecondHalf

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BB, make sure it's just about fun, and make sure she's not your only option.

If you have serious designs on this chick for a long term relationship, you'll end up with a liar and a skank.

You would merely be another branch is her hypergamous journey to the top.


SH
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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hockeyfreak79

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BB123 said:
I've been talking to this girl for about 3 months and she has a boyfriend but she slept with me anyways the first night we met. So I've seen her a three or four times sense then; getting drinks and back to my place once. Anyways I keep initiating contact rarely does she however I always get a quick response and she seems very interested.
Recently I invited her to and activity and she said she wanted to go but had to work. Pretty clear she was upset she couldn't come because of work. I also figure that she is having issues with the boyfriend at this point. I cut the conversation saying I would take her when she was free but I failed to set the date at that time. She reallllllly wanted to go.
So a day or two later I thought I should probably set the date...and she will not respond suddenly.
I think I should have been more aggressive when I found out she was fighting with her boyfriend and invited her out then because she couldn't come to the date. Or could she just be testing me to see if I will react? I like the girl but I'm not sure how to react? Wait a few more days? Or ask her what is wrong? I know her current relationship is a bit rocky. Could just be something going on.

She cheated on her BF with you and you think her relationship is a bit rocky? Could be something going on. Wow

She sabotage her relationship dude, she is not a quality chick. SMH
 

Scaramouche

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Dear BB123,
She sounds like she is really worth going that extra yard for!
 
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