Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

She broke up with me over text need help.

vic1234

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 26, 2020
Messages
27
Reaction score
13
Age
33
So I received this two message from her today and now she want us meet for dinner on Friday then fly to holiday to Maldives....below are messages what do you all think?


1) We couldn’t talk calm anymore, we have other dreams and priorities. You want to move somewhere faraway I want to stay here , you dream about child soon, I need my time . We have other past other cultures. I think it’s the best way for us


2) I loved you so much and I thought that we can build our fairytale but we both know what we want and I think we have both to strong characters. I can’t even imagine that one day I would be kissing someone on stage and you taking it easy .... we can still be friends if it’s possible if not then I ll also understand
 

ShePays

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 13, 2019
Messages
2,146
Reaction score
1,684
Location
Southeast USA
So I received this two message from her today and now she want us meet for dinner on Friday then fly to holiday to Maldives....below are messages what do you all think?


1) We couldn’t talk calm anymore, we have other dreams and priorities. You want to move somewhere faraway I want to stay here , you dream about child soon, I need my time . We have other past other cultures. I think it’s the best way for us


2) I loved you so much and I thought that we can build our fairytale but we both know what we want and I think we have both to strong characters. I can’t even imagine that one day I would be kissing someone on stage and you taking it easy .... we can still be friends if it’s possible if not then I ll also understand
Who's paying for that? Is she paying?
 

ShePays

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 13, 2019
Messages
2,146
Reaction score
1,684
Location
Southeast USA
Am paying money not issues have been paying mostly because she is not that ok finace wise..
Do what you like, but it's pretty s hitty of her to dump you and then to stick you with the check for the opportunity to whoo her back. Don't do it, if it'll put a financial strain on you. Whatever you do, don't allow yourself to be emotionally manipulated.
 
Last edited:

vic1234

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 26, 2020
Messages
27
Reaction score
13
Age
33
Do what you like, but it's pretty s hitty of her to dump you and then to stick you with the check for the opportunity to whoo her back. Don't do it, of it'll put a financial strain on you. Whatever you do, don't allow yourself to be emotionally manipulated.
Might then just pay dinner drinks then bring her home some sex and then I become indifferent. I really miss last sex with her and am gone Mia...
 

image

"If you love women, you must read the SoSuave Guide to Women. It's fantastic!"

ShePays

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 13, 2019
Messages
2,146
Reaction score
1,684
Location
Southeast USA
Might then just pay dinner drinks then bring her home some sex and then I become indifferent. I really miss last sex with her and am gone Mia...
Better yet, if you're just gonna blow her off, anyway...tell her to pickup the check for dinner, in expectation of your picking up the tab for the trip...
 

Barrister

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 28, 2018
Messages
218
Reaction score
219
Age
34
So I received this two message from her today and now she want us meet for dinner on Friday then fly to holiday to Maldives....below are messages what do you all think?


1) We couldn’t talk calm anymore, we have other dreams and priorities. You want to move somewhere faraway I want to stay here , you dream about child soon, I need my time . We have other past other cultures. I think it’s the best way for us


2) I loved you so much and I thought that we can build our fairytale but we both know what we want and I think we have both to strong characters. I can’t even imagine that one day I would be kissing someone on stage and you taking it easy .... we can still be friends if it’s possible if not then I ll also understand
Again, she is trying to lure you in to being an orbiter. This type of dialogue will continue for months if you let it. In the meantime, she will be going out and hooking up with other dudes while talking to you about your "fairytale" with her. Not to mention the more you talk to her the harder you are going to make it on yourself.

No contact with her and start talking to other women. That is what you need to do.
 

Barrister

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 28, 2018
Messages
218
Reaction score
219
Age
34
Might then just pay dinner drinks then bring her home some sex and then I become indifferent. I really miss last sex with her and am gone Mia...
You aren't indifferent at all though. You came and posted about it here to us so she obviously is important to you.

If your no contact has truly made her realize she made a mistake and rekindled things for you then great. I would be careful though about her giving you "just enough" to keep you hanging on while in reality it is still sh1t and in reality you're just an orbiter. That is the way those messages read. She has no intention of you two being together long term - but I think that is what YOU want.

For sex I would explore other options. There's plenty out there that won't have the same emotional strings that you will experience with her.
 

vic1234

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 26, 2020
Messages
27
Reaction score
13
Age
33
Thanks much I will see her and make it great evening for her then go Radio silence no contact forever with her . From Saturday till ever
 

EyeOnThePrize

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 9, 2019
Messages
640
Reaction score
859
Age
29
@vic1234
You are proving my point. You are effectively BSing yourself and pretending to be indifferent when you really aren't. As @Barrister mentioned you wouldn't have made this thread and you wouldn't be asking how to respond to her messages if you were indifferent. The forum is littered with threads like this where men are deceiving themselves into thinking they are being indifferent. If you've been doing things conditionally with her then you haven't been true to yourself, you've been having a very transactional relationship.

This is why I'm saying just go ghost until you get your sheet together. You decided to follow @ShePays advice and say 'ok' but you aren't listening to the rest of his advice, which is to stay silent. You will look for any excuse to interact with her and BS yourself that it's not affecting you when it is.

You need to distance yourself from her until you can think straight.

I'm willing to bet after Saturday you will start to feel like you could have made it a better time for her, and will make up another reason to contact her.

Obsessing over your last impression on her is a trap of the mind, don't fall for it. If you meet with her do it for you, not for her. But your heads screwed up right now so my vote is don't talk to her, don't meet her, and to focus on other women or on self improvement.
 
Last edited:

bcude

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2019
Messages
511
Reaction score
754
Age
38
Am i understanding this correctly.
She broke up with you and goes on how different you guys are blah blah, but now wants to have dinner and go to the maldives aka one of the most expensive places you can think of with you, and you're expected to pay for it all. Is that correct?

The answer is no. Dude, she broke up with you over TEXT and you want to reward that behavior and be humiliated in the process by being used financially aswell. Even if you want anything from her ever again, she will have to work hard for it. Things are different now because of her actions, she has no priority in your life anymore.
She has to feel the consequences of her actions.
By answering and complying you're basically telling her she can p1ss on you and you will still come and pat her on her back. Now is the time to show you've a backbone. Rise from the ashes like a phoenix. You need distance from her, that's very apparent.
 

BeTheChange

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 28, 2015
Messages
1,476
Reaction score
1,110
Don’t try to spin the truth. My point was clear from the outset: butthurt men ignore women. It’s a low class way of dealing with the situation.
No it isn't.

Law 36: Disdain things you cannot have, Ignoring them is the best revenge


You choose to let things bother you.
You can just as easily choose, not to notice the irritating offender, to consider the matter trivial and unworthy of your interest. This is the powerful move. What you do not react to cannot drag you down in a futile engagement. Your pride is not involved. The best lesson you can teach an irritating gnat is to consign it to oblivion by ignoring it.

You are the king, and you ignore what offends you.

You should take very few grievances to heart, for to do so is to give yourself groundless worry...Many things which seem important [at the time] turn out to be of no account when they are ignored; and others which seem trifling, appear formindable when you pay attention to them

Desire often creates paradoxical effects. The more you want something, the more you chase after it, the more it eludes you. The more interest you show,the more you repel the object of your desire. This is because your interest is too strong - it makes people awkward, even fearful. Uncontrollale desire, makes you seem weak, unworthy, pathetic.

Contempt is the perogatvie of the king. Where his eyes turn, what he decides to see, is what has reality; what he ignores and turns his back on is as good as dead.

If choosing to ignore someone enhances your power, it follows that the opposite approach - commitment and engagement - often weakens you.

One man tries with all his might to seize the goddess, and only loses his time and his trouble. Another seems, to all appearance, to be running out of sight: but, no: she herself takes a pleasure in pursuing him.

Instead of inadvertendly focusing attention on a problem, making it seem worse by publicizing how much concern and anxiety it is causing you, it is often far wiser to play the contemptuous aristocrat, not deigning to acknowledge the problem's existence.

Remember: the powerful response to niggling, petty annoyances and irritations are contempt and disdain. Never show that something has affected you, or that you are offended - that only shows that you have acknowledged a problem. Contempt is a dish which is best served cold and without affection.


-----------------
 

vic1234

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 26, 2020
Messages
27
Reaction score
13
Age
33
The amount of wisdom being oozed in this forum is on another level.thanks guys. Most of your advice are point on and very painful because they are true to read... am so much greatful and I wish I knew all this bofore... Everything would be totally different now. But nothing have been lost yet
 

ShePays

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 13, 2019
Messages
2,146
Reaction score
1,684
Location
Southeast USA
The amount of wisdom being oozed in this forum is on another level.thanks guys. Most of your advice are point on and very painful because they are true to read... am so much greatful and I wish I knew all this bofore... Everything would be totally different now. But nothing have been lost yet
Just gotta remember, once she breaks it off, the boyfriend experience is no longer on the table. However, she can have the EX boyfriend experience, where she comes over to your place, if you're available, and brings gifts and offerings....and you don't get emotionally involved...again.
 

Carson02

Don Juan
Joined
Sep 29, 2019
Messages
22
Reaction score
18
Age
118
Might then just pay dinner drinks then bring her home some sex and then I become indifferent. I really miss last sex with her and am gone Mia...
Has she apologized or even expressed regret for breaking up with you? You are validating her and will soon be buying her an expensive meal. Don’t be surprised if she withholds sex from you as a lure for future contact.
 
Last edited:

image

Put away your credit card.

You can now read our detailed guide to women and dating for free - Right Here!

vic1234

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 26, 2020
Messages
27
Reaction score
13
Age
33
Has she apologized or even expressed regret for breaking up with you? You are validating her and will soon be buying her an expensive meal. Don’t be surprised if she withholds sex from you as a lure for future contact.
She has not. But Instead blamed me for whole thing,so I want to give her flowers when she come to my place Friday.then I will bang her then we go dinner and bang her again and Saturday bang her before she leaves then go no contact . By doing this she will learn a lesson
 

vic1234

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 26, 2020
Messages
27
Reaction score
13
Age
33
Just gotta remember, once she breaks it off, the boyfriend experience is no longer on the table. However, she can have the EX boyfriend experience, where she comes over to your place, if you're available, and brings gifts and offerings....and you don't get emotionally involved...again.
She has not. But Instead blamed me for whole thing,so I want to give her flowers when she come to my place Friday.then I will bang her then we go dinner and bang her again and Saturday bang her before she leaves then go no contact . By doing this she will learn a lesson
 

vic1234

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 26, 2020
Messages
27
Reaction score
13
Age
33
Am i understanding this correctly.
She broke up with you and goes on how different you guys are blah blah, but now wants to have dinner and go to the maldives aka one of the most expensive places you can think of with you, and you're expected to pay for it all. Is that correct?

The answer is no. Dude, she broke up with you over TEXT and you want to reward that behavior and be humiliated in the process by being used financially aswell. Even if you want anything from her ever again, she will have to work hard for it. Things are different now because of her actions, she has no priority in your life anymore.
She has to feel the consequences of her actions.
By answering and complying you're basically telling her she can p1ss on you and you will still come and pat her on her back. Now is the time to show you've a backbone. Rise from the ashes like a phoenix. You need distance from her, that's very apparent.
She Instead blamed me for whole thing,so I want to give her flowers when she come to my place Friday.then I will bang her then we go dinner and bang her again and Saturday bang her before she leaves then go no contact . By doing this she will learn a lesson
 

bcude

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2019
Messages
511
Reaction score
754
Age
38
Personally i think it's petty with these revenge plays to try to teach her something eventhough you're full of anger and disappointment right now, rationalizing you're only after s3x and think that's going to show her. Fact is, you're wasting your precious time on someone not worthy of your time anymore. Your complete silence would communicate the most effective lesson but that's hard to comprehend when you're like a drug user needing his fix. You've got so much wisdom here as you said, read this thread again and again.
Buying her flowers and dinners is not going to teach her the lessons you want to teach her, quite the opposite. She's using you.
 
Top