Sh*t My Dad Says

[Razor Sharp]

Looks like I have a new hero:

http://twitter.com/****mydadsays

"I like the dog. If he can't eat it, or sh*t it, he pisses on it. I can get behind that."

"See, you think I give a sh*t. Wrong. In fact, while you talk, I'm thinking; How can I give less of sh*t? That's why I look interested."

"Universe is 14 billion years old. Seems silly to celebrate one year. Be like having a f*cking parade every time i take a piss."

"War hero? No. I was a doc in Vietnam. My job was to say "This is what happens when you screw a hooker, kid. Put this cream on your pecker."

"HIDDEN roaming charges? Jesus, Sprint has 'f*cking people' down to a science, like they practice it in a f*cking lab on mice first."

"I wanted to see Detroit win. I've been there. It's like God took a sh*t on a parking lot. They deserve some good news."

"Does anyone your age know how to comb their f*cking hair? It looks like two squirrels crawled on their head and started f*cking."

"Sometimes life leaves a hundred dollar bill on your dresser, and you don't realize until later that it's because it f*cked you."

F*cking LOL - will be interesting to see how the tv show pans out. http://gawker.com/5401019/cbs-picks-up-**-my-dad-says-twitter-sitcom

Edit: Aww for the love of Jesus the H Bastard Christ, the f*cking SoSuave cuss filter just wrecked those links. Seriously what the f*ck is up with this sh*t? Are we not grown adults? Why is a site dedicated to spreading buttcheeks forced to use PG-13 language? It makes no f*cking sense at all!

Does anyone know why this gay-ass pottymouth filter even exists? I really hate having to type the f*cking asterisk key when it doesnt capture what I really want to say, god-motherf*cking dammit!

 

[Drum&Bass]

Filter ? what fucking filter ?

 

[Trader]

Looks like I have a new hero:

http://twitter.com/****mydadsays



"I like the dog. If he can't eat it, or sh*t it, he pisses on it. I can get behind that."

"See, you think I give a sh*t. Wrong. In fact, while you talk, I'm thinking; How can I give less of sh*t? That's why I look interested."

"Universe is 14 billion years old. Seems silly to celebrate one year. Be like having a f*cking parade every time i take a piss."

"War hero? No. I was a doc in Vietnam. My job was to say "This is what happens when you screw a hooker, kid. Put this cream on your pecker."

"HIDDEN roaming charges? Jesus, Sprint has 'f*cking people' down to a science, like they practice it in a f*cking lab on mice first."

"I wanted to see Detroit win. I've been there. It's like God took a sh*t on a parking lot. They deserve some good news."

"Does anyone your age know how to comb their f*cking hair? It looks like two squirrels crawled on their head and started f*cking."

"Sometimes life leaves a hundred dollar bill on your dresser, and you don't realize until later that it's because it f*cked you."

Classless and lame.

But I am assuming the OP is under 20, so I will give him a free pass

 

[Wiesman44]

Classless and lame.

But I am assuming the OP is under 20, so I will give him a free pass

I second that

 

[Razor Sharp]

Dammit, I made the most rookie mistake of all - leaving sessions open on my laptop while family is visiting. My punk nephew posted this before upping the ante and writing love notes to warpigs on POF, I just caught him posting that I've "come out of the closet" on Facebook, the little bastard.

Note to self: NEVER hit the "Remember Me" checkbox!

Sorry for the noise bros. And to the 5 people he PMed, that's only half true!

Mods feel free to delete this trash

 

[Sir Psycho Sexy]

Filter ? what fucking filter ?

****ing


lol how did you do that?

 

[Serialized3]

****ing


lol how did you do that?

very simple you cock-garglers