Sex but no LTR

[becker]

Long time since I've been on this board, doing a lot of field stuff. Anyways, I've come to the conclusion that as far as I go, I can get a girl in bed, but apparently I have trouble getting into any LTR with them. I think my biggest problem has been that when a girl asks me the whole "where do we stand" question, I get sort of freaked out and don't want to sort of give into what seems like the power struggle and and sort of give some cryptic answer and just try to wait for her to give in first, which doesn't seem to work out well. For all you LTR masters, what do you do when you transition from sex to LTR? I suck at it.

 

[blinkwatt]

Do not give them a straight answer. When any girl ask me any question like that I look into their eyes and use "you'll see" or "you will find out in time". It drives them crazy and they come with "what does that mean?" and just stare into their eyes. This way you could continue on in the relationship as YOU want with no bars. Truth is no one wants to be held down or felt obligated that they must do this or that because they are someones gf or bf. Just use those lines and play your cards how you want to,not off a fixed deck.

 

[resilient]

Just don't be stupid like me in my last relationship where I said something along the lines of "I can't be in this relationship having sex with you if I know I'm not the only one sleeping in your bed." It had nice needy desperate guy writen all over that sentence. If she knew I had other options she would be fighting to keep me in her bed possibly.

I think I could have kept tapping that if I hadn't forced her to a decision to dump me because I was looking for exclusivity instead of letting her make up her mind naturally instead of being pressured to. I'm learning to trust the DJ bible and its values will uphold my respect as a man and to never ask for exclusivity again -- she has to ask me.

I like someone's signature quote on this board "A man is only as desperate as his options are."

 

[MightyMate]

I also had this probklem. It was easy for me to get # or even **** many woman. But not to have LTR. Maybe i didnt want LTR with em donno. Anyways now im fine.

 

[becker]

It's crazy though, I always hit a wall once that point in the relationship comes up, because I'm sort of paranoid about it. Used to be better when I didn't know as much, darn it.